jamdaar0

i tend to use the diversion tactic a lot, if i can see him drifting off or getting a bit annoyed or violent i mention his favourite animals, or try to talk abotu soemthign hes interested in.

oh my god that sounds like my son too.... he does exactly the same sort of thing, getting violent and screaming out in a controlled way randomly and he just wants to have a hug . hes only 3 , what do you do, hes starting nursery in a week

yes i need somone in midlands too

ok got an update i took the advice on the forum and opted for a quiet sit down together with the manager and my coleague to work things out it turns out he had issues with sharing his "industry secrets". he was just a bit insecure about me coming there and knowing too much about the technicals and didn't want to share his knowledge with me. I explained about the aspergers and that I'm not too good at communicating anyway and will back off if i get a negative response, so he seemed to listen and things went pretty ok today. he was very pleasant and helpful. I also backed off a bit asking questions about his "industry secrets". the company seems pretty encouraging and willing to help people who have difficulties which is nice to know. just wanted to thank everyone who replied and gave some sound advice! jam

thanks kinda i think mainly im having problems with doing written assignments the practicals im find i ernjoy and do really well at but struggle with understanding whats required for the written assignment. i only did the masters because it deals with the practical creative work i do, and wasnt prepared for all the theory and written work involved. other issues im having are related to adhd and finding it really hard to research or read journals and also sit down to write assignments, some times i sit down to write it and I end up getting up again and again to walk about every few minutes. it seems it takes me so much longer then everyone else to do a simple written peice of work. I spoke to my lecturer about it and he said not to worry and ask as many questions as possible, because in class I seem to be the only one in the dark. anyway got my latest Assignment done on saturday, took me all day, and i just had to force myself to sit down and WORK! rushed through most of it and managed to pull it together, by telling myself get it done and tomorrow i can chill with family and play some xbox360. i have spoken to student enabling and they said to go see my gp, so im seeing him this thursday once i get a proper diagnosis then i can get soem proper help from the uni. as for the work issue, im not guna run away im guna stick it out a bit more and try and understand why i always feel like that and try to work with it. thanks to everyone on the forum because its been SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO helpful. jam

ok I have been thinking a lot and looking back i think i have a problem whenever i start a new job the last place i worked i only lasted two months, and i freaked out and had to leave, but somehow managed to keep some part time work going there. but i do remember after 1 month gettign really down about being good enough for the job, and finding it hard to speak to people, and i thought i wasnt fitting in, even to the extent i phoned my old manager (fromt he job before the last) at the museum up and asked fro my old job back. I liked it at teh museum it was quite secluded. and i just got on with my work and my manager she was such an understanding and lovely person and made me feel ok in the job. so the same thign is hapenign again, i do still think the other guy is blanking me, but i am still going through the same thign again of panic, of not feeling upto the job, wantign to leave, not fitting in... i think its a pattern, because i still phone up my old place and ask fro my old job back on the whole of it everyone thinks im a successful person, doign really well, but i know its just so hard not to run away from it. and i have to face the fact that this will probably be the way i feel when i go somewhere new. any advice....... on the upside i graduated from my post graduate diploma last week, despite havign no prior qualifications, and it was soemething i never thought i could ever acheive, It was a funded course for people who work in the industry, and my work got me in. I am now doing the masters course, but finding it really dificult, went to see the student enabling centre today because im finding it really hard to concentrate and do my research and lectures, because i havent been in educational situation for a long time, its a proper battle. like trying to reign in a wild dog on a leash. anyway student enablign told me to see my gp first so that i could be diagnosed with it properly or else they will not be able to help me. they did give me a dyslexic self assessment ??? form which i filled in and handed back. any ideas on the gp thing because im almost 30 now they guna think im being silly. like why now..... you survived this long it's like i never knew , and to find out now after so long....... i dont knwo wether its a releif to find out or not. i dont even knwo hwo to tell people, because they dont beleive me, they just treat it liek a joke.nt mind but noone takes it seriously. they all just think your doing ok. but im trying to explain why i do certain things and why i am the way i am and that it really does effect me in my day to day life jam

thanks Karen the forum is very useful resource as I'm really new to all this stuff. Canopus, i really like the aspergers technical site. the information i found on it was more encouraging and concentrating on the positive aspects of aspergers, which is more what i would want to show employers. jam

thanks canopus that aspergers technical link is great. very handy indeed. pearl; your right I have maede it clear to my manager giving him examples of when I have collaborated with others and even asked him to get some feedback from others I have worked with. because there is noone else I have a problem with. kinda; yes I think u are right. I think I have been overthinking it. whatever it is I think the best thing is to be honest and talk about it. I still don't know why he is behaving in this way. and ur right I don't want to go down an adverserial route. I have spoken to my manager and made it clear that I want to resolve the siuationa d make it work and if it is something that I am or am not doing then I will do everything to rectify it. I have immaculate references from previous employers, some of my workmates understand the situation and agree that his behaviour is wrong. but they don't understand why i'm taking it so hard or seriously. they say just keep your head down and keep working hard. eventually you will be working independantly. but at the moment I'm stuck with him and its hard for me and stressful. I didn't relate this situation to aspergers but my manager suggested that it might be and requested some info. I did explain it might be why I find it hard to talk to him because of the negative responses I have received. will update you on how it goes.

yes im referring to post problems at work everythign im finding just doesnt fit, my manager just wants info about aspergers at work because they dont have a clue. but I think your suggestion about writing my own information sheet is FANTASTIC, i would never have though of that and it makes sense. it would allow me to add information and tailor it to my main concerns and problems. thanks Mate! <'> I think i will start to do that. Jam

hi ime new to the forum. I have just recently in my late 20s learnt that I have aspergers and dyslexia. ihave been having problems at work recently I moved to a new company and they have a huge open office layout. previously ihave worked alone or in relative seclusion. so its hard so many people ambient noise. loads of uncomfortable moments but nothing I can't handle. I have a problem with a co worker. we both do the same work. and I was brought in to help with his workload few days a wek. since I have been here he just ignores me. won't give me anything to do. if I approach him for help he acts like I'm dumb or as if I am annoying him. its been so frustrating and I have thought about leaving, but for me it really is a dream job. something I would never have thought was possible. It took me 3 months to pluck up the courage to approach a manager about how I felt. the aspergers came up in the meeting and I said that it has never been an issue for me at previous workplaces and downt effect my professional work. iknow he (coleague) is being rude to me and ignoring me on purpose because I have two very good people who help me out and I help them out. my manager has requested some info about aspergers. but all the info online points to the fact that I am rude can't communicate. say wrong things. and therefore the problem is ME. but I know for a fact the guy has just been blanking me. I have spent a lot of time studying my profession and reading technicalmanuals obsessively so I think he might be jealous, or intimidated. but I am not a big ego or a showoff quite the opposite and willing to learn all ican. I feel that the aspergers is guna make it worse and his bullying will be overlooked and the root of the problem made out to be my condition. would appreciate any advice or guidance. jam

my manager at work has requested soem information about aspergers i was wonderign if anyone had some leaflets or information resources that would be ideal to give an employer, and that wouldnt put them off. jam