nettie

hi tree like you a felt very alone and friends and family didn't understand. I'm new to this site but already I feel among friends, I've had some great advice which will help me. Good luck for tomorrow. Take bids adice and try and write things down and give them a copy. My mind used to go blank and I couldn't concentrate because the twins were usually causing havoc and I never got to say everything I wanted to. you have to wait so long for these appointments so you need to tell them everything. You are doing the right thing getting your daughter assessed...the earlier the better . let us know how it went . we'll be thinking of you. nettie

Thanks for making me welcome Brook: I found the link helpful and will let the boys know about it. thanks annie: I agree, it is much more important that the boys are happier and stress free than to aim for a load of GCSEs. You mentioned that Alex does education other than at school. Can I ask what he does ? as when the boys are not in school and are at home they are not doing anything. When they were in Yr 10 I managed to arrange for a couple of taster courses at the college through the school to college link programme. The school are supposed to arrange this ! Nothing has been put into place for Yr 11. I will have to chase them up again !! I will be very intrested to hear how Alex gets on with his work exp. Will the employer be told of his difficulties ?. As it didn't work out before for the boys I am nervous about putting them in that situation again, but I'm sure the school will be pressuring them to do so. So any advice would be really helpful. nettie x

Hi. I'm so glad I've found this forum. I have been looking at the different posts for a couple of weeks now and for the first time in years I don't feel so alone. You are such a friendly bunch of people and the support you give each other is invaluable -I just wish I'd found you sooner then maybe I wouldn't have cried so many tears! I am mum to 16yr old identical twin boys who have both just been dx with AS. I also have an NT 18yr old daughter. The boys have had a SEN since they were 5yrs old for a "specific complex language disorder". I have always felt that the boys behaviour was different even as babies. The social communication difficulties were always put down to the language disorder - how wrong they were!!! The boys have always gone to mainstream school with a Learning Support Facility attached to it. School life has always been very hard and things got so bad when they started High school due to bullying, sensitivity to noise, struggling to make and maintain friendships, lunchtimes and games lessons a nightmare ...I could go on ! that by Yr 10 they could no longer cope, G had a breakdown and he ended up being seen by CAHMS. It broke my heart to see them suffering so much emotional pain. I could have done with knowing you guys !! I knew this was due to something much deeper than a language disorder and I started looking into AS. Now a year later we have a dx. They have a drastically reduced timetable and only go into school for a couple of hrs a day so alot of their anxiety has been alleviated. However their education has suffered and they will leave school with virtually no qualifications. The boys chose to do a Unit Award scheme and Work exp as part of their exam provision when thy chose their options in Yr 10. This also is not working out very well ( another story !) Has anyone else's teen done work exp yet ? I am seeing the Head of the Support facility on Thurs to see where we go from here, maybe a vocational college course. Is college life the same as school life ? I worry about their future but I'm trying to be optimistic. I'm sorry my first post is so long I'm sure I could write a book on the last 16yrs ! I think the moral of my story is to get a dx when the children are young and get the right support. I think if this had been the case with us I would have pushed for a place in a special school, then maybe things would have turned out differently ?! xx