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wishingwell

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Posts posted by wishingwell

  3. Posted · Report reply

    Don't under-estimate that - it's a BIG step. Particularly, if as you've said, J's dad displays 'more than a few' AS traits

     

    My son's dad had a horrible school life which left him totally confused and with many hang ups with regards to himself. No-one ever understood him, he says his mother would go to bed when a problem arose and talk to no-one, so other people where free to deal with him in whatever way they choose.

     

    When our 1st son was born and problems began her advice was, "Oh his father was like that", SO what did U do? "Nothing he's grown out of it." Unfortunately they still have a very volatile relationship.

     

    Back to our son, in the early days when I was first trying to find out what was causing our DS to behave in certain ways he said very little. As time passed and we learned more and started to get through to DS we talked more, Dad was learning about DS and himself along the way and the more he discovered the more help he was to his DS and me. He was able to tell me how DS was feeling about certain situations and explain how he felt DS would best react. We have had some very good help with things that I wouldn't have felt where necessary but to DS they where the cause of the problem. He attends all important meetings and is an excellent negotiator he never leaves a meeting until things are put right .

     

    With regards to J going to matron I think that he should, so long as she can offer some understanding words of advice and be prepared to listen. Your son needs to have some-one that he feels he can trust, my son's head teacher was the one he went to when he was anxious or had done something inappropriate he listened to her because she was the boss over the school. Luckily for him she also had a very good understanding of AS and was able to reroute him back to class feeling much better.

  4. Posted · Report reply

    Great work Tjolodo! :thumbs:

     

    Good idea to photo copy even though it took a long time.

     

    Give it 1 week to get there, then phone to see if they have received it.

     

    Mine got lost in the post and i had to redo the whole thing. :wallbash::wallbash::wallbash:

     

    Then they advised me to use recorded delivery when posting (costs extra to post) but after all the work it will definitely get to them and you have a receipt of post.

     

    Good Luck!

  9. Posted · Report reply

    Does your son have a statement,

    Homework in primary was a complete nightmare. It could take all night to get through it.

    I spoke with the Head-teacher and his teacher and we came to an understanding that if he was over stressed he would give one word answers. If there were 10 sentences I would write half and he would write half. Lots of photo copies to reduce the amount of writing. Maths, if he fully understood the questions 5 sums where enough instead of a full page. He loves drawing and he was allowed as a reward for doing his h/work to draw a picture which was also marked and he was very pleased with this. We had a home/school dairy which I wrote in and the school wrote in, if it wasn't written down them I wrote and asked why? Because he would be extremely upset at not having his work done. I made it very clear that his h/work was very important to me and him but we could only achieve with this with their full co-operation. If they carried out their part I did not need to be standing in the school the next morning waiting on an explanation as to why my son was upset about homework, which happened quite a few times in the early stages. I think they eventually got tired looking at me and got it right.

     

    He no longer needs these things he does pages of homework without asking me to write (thinks he knows more than me now) thank god!

  10. Posted · Report reply

    Hi Lisa

     

    He's 12 and been wearing them for 2 years. When we initially went for the first appointment he was clearly upset about the dept of the colour in the lenses and was very unco-operative. His dad and I took him out for a break and to talk to him, we wanted to explain to him that they might help him with the problems he was having and that they would only be used at home first to see if they where going to be a help, we would not be pressuring him to wear them it was for him to make the discussion and for him to feel comfortable. We returned to complete the tests and the things we discovered where absolutely amazing. The one that sticks in my mind was when a ball was thrown to him without the lenses he couldn't caught it, but with the lenses he could. His posture was poor and now he walks straight with his head up. There were to many things to list that we found out about his vision and it made us aware of the serious difficultly he was facing every day. We as parents felt that it was worth spending the money and having the glasses, we where prepared to take the chance, he had a lot to gain from these glasses.

    He had picked a lovely pair of frames. When we went to collect the first pair his face dropped, they where a deep blue colour, but he refused to wear them leaving.

    So we traveled home and had no idea if he would ever come round to wearing them. Off he went to play his PS2 and i brought him in his tea along with the glasses. After tea he did put them on. No-one passed comment that he was wearing them the next day he went to school without them came home struggled through his homework to get his time on his PS2. And to my amazement he was wearing the glasses playing his PS2. This continued for about a week and he was making great progress with playing his games, he then move on to wearing them for homework, the quicker he got through the h/work the more time he had for his games. No more headaches and he was not as stressed, I suggested he should wear them to school, I spoke with school and they where very encouraging towards him using them and talked positively to the other children. Who now think he is cool. His school work has improved also his writing is great, it now flows and he no longer digs holes in his pages, no more pain when writing. He has started grammar school and he has been asked why he is wearing them he says the light hurts his eyes I've asked has anyone said anything that is upsetting about them and he says no they think my shades are cool...

    He decides when to wear and when not to. If he's going out with his friend he leaves them at home but for school, karate, making things, computer, video games, TV, and reading he automatically wears them. He wears them more than not.

  14. Posted · Report reply

    Hi Wardie

     

     

    My sister has been telling me about her daughter who, although very bright is slipping at school. Turns out that her eyes aren't seeing all words, something about one eye skipping words so that she reads what she sees but it doesn't make any sense because she is missing bits!

     

    My DS was aways having problems with copying and writing his words down he would leave out a different letters. He could verbally spell but could not copy them from one page to another without missing out a letter in the word. Hasn't got this problem now since getting his colored lenses. They also made a big difference to his balance and co-ordination, he was forever walking into things. PE is not a big problem he can join in and enjoy it wearing his glasses, before he hated PE, his hand and eye co-ordination was so bad it was impossible for him to play team games. And he was teased for being so awkward.

  16. Posted · Report reply

    I'm glad you found it so worthwhile, you have discovered a lot in the last week. It will also help others understand the daily difficulties he endures and be more supportive towards him. Introduce the things at a pace you feel sure you can continue, there's a lot to take on board. You are already very tuned in to his needs. All this altogether will be a very big help towards improving things for him now and in the future. Sending you both lots of support for the times ahead. :thumbs::thumbs:

  22. Posted · Report reply

    Apart from the full time support which has started, there's no 'area', no visual timetable, no home school diary and who knows what else.

     

    Pearls right, these things are very important and always will be to your son. Thats why the statement is there to enforce the child's needs, not for them to willy nilly around them. Buy your on home/school dairy and hand it to them. Ask for everything that will help him have less stress in his school life. My son could not get through without his dairy and visual planner. Maybe it just me but we can fill 2 school jotters a year. If it not written in the book its not happening. And if it not happening it their fault for not have written it in the dairy. He has enough stress getting through the work l

     

    Hope things get sorted soon.

  24. Posted · Report reply

    Well done Tally :D You done great yesterday!

     

    I telephoned a stranger and she is coming to my house tomorrow to give me a quote for the wallpapering I want doing (not just any old random stranger, a proper decorator)

     

    How did you do today with the decorator?

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