jan66

hello, ty for sharing your thoughts , reading your reply also really upset me too, does your daughter also have as? it is the most awful thing to witness as a parent, to find your child hurting themselves, im so afraid like you worryng, that this could happen again,reading your mail you have witnessed this many times, i hope like me you receive some help and support and also your daughter too , like me i think you would want nothing more than your daughter to be happy doing normal teenager things and enjoying life. The saddest thing i find is that someone has to do something like this, to make people sit up and listen. My son is now receiving support of our local mental health crisis team, and someone is also coming to see me tomorrow to offer some support and advice . Please take care of yourself and your precious daughterx and ty for your reply

dear all , thankyou for your kind thoughts and messages, i am awaiting a call of the mental health team this morning, and im just hoping that the help and support that is needed has finally arrived, to my horror i had to wait for 24hrs for a call confirming that they actually were going to come, i havnt slept in days , afraid to i think, i think finally knowing that my son has aspergers has really hit him hard , even though i think somewhere he must feel some kind of relief that he now knows why he acts and feels the way he does.,his college tutors are all aware of his problems, i always keep in contact with them, just to ensure sonnys ok. we are one week away from a visit to a consultant physciatrist, so thats a little relief.unfortunately there are no support groups in my area i live in northwest close to a town called preston, i hear the nearest support group is manchester 60miles away!! i know my son has used this forum to try and chat to others like himself, but he says no one replies, i think he was hoping he could maybe find someone to chat to on a one to one kinda thing, like they do on messenger , i am trying to coax him into keep trying and hopefully he will find a connection with someone, maybe close to where we live, male or female would be nice then maybe he wouldnt feel so alone, once again ty so much to all, your comments are helping me greatly x

i was awoken last night to the sound of my son 19yrs sobbing, it is now o4.12 in the morning out of my mind with worry, my son has been recently diagnosed with aspergers after 10 yrs of many gp appointments this is the second time in two weeks i have been woken up in the early hours to my son in this state , he is tall handsome extremely intelligent,plays both acoustic and electric guitar, may i also say he is self taught, and plays them both outstandingly, he is currently studying music at college, and passed with distinction in his first year. i was woken up to my son calling out for me, to my horror he was stood over the kitchen sink, my first reaction was that he was being sick, as i looked down i saw the carving knife!!! my son had cut open one of his wrists!! he had been out earlier in the evening , and i had been led to beleive he was meeting a friend,they were going to play pool and he would be home by 10.30 ish, i dropped him off and asked him who he was meeting, truth of the matter was he met no one!! but decieded to go to a pub where i think his aim was to meet someone , anyone that would be a friend. my mind is reeling as a parent, not sure whether this is aspergers related?? my son has never been able to keep any friends, even as a really young child he always struggled and would prefer to stay home with me, raising my second son has been really really difficult for me ,as a mum you notice other children and their behaviour, and my sons was always' different' as i said has always struggled with keeping friends, i dont know what goes wrong, but they come and go, come and go, to now where the position is that he has no friends outside college, he sits in his room for weeks days, alone and has no social life at all, it breaks my heart as a mum, i dont know what to do anymore, at present he has been diagnosed with depression and is currently taking medicine for that, his mood swings are terrible one day he can be as high as a kite wanting to chat, usually on days like that his speech is so fast i often have to get him to repeat whats been said as i carnt always catch what he says, and then we have weeks of him not talking at all will not engage in conversation at all. my son is so so unhappy and i feel so helpless, my mind is bursting with anxiety and worry , my days are consumed with thoughts only for him, is he having a good day? is he alone at college? please let him come home smiling? my son very rarely smiles and never has, when he does i feel happy . anyone???????

hi, and yes is the answer to your question when ,sonny was aged 10 they thought asd, when 13, it was depression,and now aspergers, at least we are here now ,sorry its taken so long to reply , but to be honest i struggle using pc!! am getting better i was overwhelmed by the replies i had would be so nice to chat with other parents

hello, my name is jan im a mum with an 18yrol . son with aspergers, just wanted to let u know youre not alone ,i promise . I know how :crying:youre feeling, as i often cry myself, i havw watched friends come and go most of my sons life, they do not seem to last very long, i couldnt honestly say he has no really close friends, well maybe one, if u can call maybe seeing each other every blue moon. He chooses to sit at home most of the time , or driving me up the wall .Ihave been told by my gp,however upseting i find it all, that i have to except that where it wouldnt suit me to lock myself away constantly,it suits my son, i am trying to look at it that way, but i find it very difficult to except.All i want is for him to be happy and live a normal teenagers life , i actually think it upsets me more than my son, i find it very suffocating at times as he would spend every minute of the day with me if he could, although i love him so much, i wish it would all go away. He does however play guitar and he plays it beautifully, he taught himself and thats the one thing that he does have a strong interest in, hope things get better for you

hello , my name is jan, i have a son with aspergers, think this place is great,i would like to exchange thoughts with other parents that have specia kids , luv him to bits but somedays arghhhhhhhh!

:rolleyes would love to talk and share thoughts with other parents that have special kids what to do now???????:

hello, my name is jan. i have 2 sons one aged 21, and another, my special one he is 18yrs. Youre post caught my eye, and i can feel youre frustration. I have always known there was something a little different with my youngest child, from the age of 2. He was always very hyperactive as a child , and had massive sleeping issues, he was actually admitted to hospital for 3 nights , and given strong medication it was to help him get in to a sleeping pattern lol, didnt work.as he got older he improved, he was always a very selfish child and was always by my side he wouldnt mix very well at all ,when he started school he walked round at lunchtime with the dinnerladies instead of playing with the kids. When he was around 9 yrs old he was tested for adhd, but we were told no! it wasnt that, so we carried on i must also say he is acceptionally bright, hence why maybe adhd was ruled out. Then at the age of 11 my 16yr marriage ended, it affected my youngest child more than the eldest boy,he became very very angry, would throw massive tantrums smash things . it was really heartbreaking to watch, he hurt himself so bad one day that we ended up in casualty, he had just missed puncturing his artery, so it took this to happen, and he was referred to a child physcologist, all they did was video him talking and prescribed anti depressants !!!!! and was told he was acting this way due to my marriage ending! i would not give him the anti depressants for obvious reasons hes only 11. Like yourself my sons father is useless, and has never been a part of their lives since we broke up , thats 9 yrs ago . High school was difficult for my yougest , not in the learning sense as he is very intelligent, but i noticed more the lack of friends in and out of school, mainly out of school, he chooses to sit in his room alone for weeks on end and had no real social life.He absolutely loves music though, so i boughtand him a guitar first one was electric, he taught himself to play , never had one lesson, then i bought him an acoustic guitar, again no lesson, but wow can he play hes amazing, people carnt beleive hes never had a lesson but truly he hasnt being a single mum it was a little out of reach to afford that. He began college last september and is studying music, it is the only time you see him smile, forgot to add that, he never smiled much all of the years he was growing up.,he was very moody and sulky.Now he is 18yrs and 5 monts ago asked me why he is different to his peers? he also told me that hes always felt different to others it breaks my heart as a mum , but that was the real turning point for me, he started to have issues at college, wasnt joining in with the others at lunchtime ,would rather sit alone or with the office staff, here it was again! He was also having major issues with the travel to and from college.The college he attends is 30 miles away, he has to get on and off 4 buses to get there and he just carnt cope with all that, he has to have everything planned, is very routine even to what he wears on a daily basis god help us when it all goes wrong as it often does!! Sonny wanted to see a doctor re theese issues, and it was then we were told that he thinks sonny is autistic/ aspergers. I was really upset, but also elated, at last, we know now , all theese years of being driven to the edge! we are waiting to see a physcologist now and just hope it all goes ok.At least now i know theres a reason for his odd behaviour and that hes not a naughty spoilt child that people think he is. My advice to you is keep fighting get a second opinion i think you know as a mum when somethings not right, it just takes that one person to sit and listen to you.I hope you find that one person and hope it dosent take as long as it took me,take care , chin up .