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About tomcat

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    Norfolk Broads

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  • Location
    Cumnock, Scotland
  • Interests
    Computers, Animals, Cars, Music, Reading, Video Games
  1. tomcat

    Hi all

    Thank you both, it's really good to be here. Good luck with the diagnosis assessment Amanda.
  2. Thank you, I think typing this post out earlier was good for me, I basically broke through the shell for a little while and my better half read what I typed, called the NAS Helpline and the very helpful lady on the other end did a search. This truly does seem to be a forgotten area, or they believe that it's easy enough for the people from here to reach Glasgow that everything is centred there, we're getting information sent out though and got information for the Abercromby Centre ARC and she called there too, so now it seems I'm going to be inundated with information. I've been reading through posts on here and other places and been finding things I can do and help that I'm actually entitled to but never knew. I DO know that the Disability Employment Advisor at the local JobCentre is as useful as a chocolate fireman "It's hard enough for a "normal" person to get a job, never mind someone with "Learning Difficulties", you're better off staying on benefits". I was struck dumb at that point and we just walked out, my WAIS-III Full Scale Score is SS 164, IQ 139, I have social and organisational problems, not learning problems and here I go again with the pent up frustrations, sorry. Once again, thank you. Just knowing that there are other people out there I can talk to helps a lot. tomcat
  3. I'm looking for some advice from any out there who can help me. I was diagnosed as being HFA in January shortly after my 32nd birthday, after being given the official diagnosis was handed a photocopy of an NAS leaflet and sent on my way with no further advice from the psychologist or my GP. There are no services in my area for Autistic adults with the exception of an NAS social group that I've been unable to find any information on other than an email address which I've received no response from as yet. The closest place for any interaction, socialisation or advice is Glasgow, around 30 miles and a ton of stress and anxiety away. This just a few short miles away from NAS Scotland's flagship/Crown Jewel, Daldorch House. "Daldorch provides a fusion of care and education across 24 hours for children and young people from 5 to 18 years. In addition, continuing educational opportunities and supported living arrangements are available for young people from 16 to 21 years. In addition the school offers an outreach service for individuals from 5 to 25 years." Effectively over the age of 25, you don't exist. On being diagnosed I was happy, finally we had a name for my differences, we could get things done, move forward with our lives and get the help and advice we needed........ only to hit brick wall after brick wall. Sorry, as I type this I'm starting to realise the resentment and anger that I've been hiding from everyone, myself included. I want, no I NEED support and advice, I NEED a way to get through life without the stress and anxiety that I've been bottling up inside and hiding. Yes I'm autistic, hiding behind a mask of "normality". That's my coping mechanism, that's how I've survived over 30 years of knowing I was different but not knowing how or why really. Being thought of as "maybe a little strange" or "funny" or "different" fighting to hold in the pain, the anger, the tears and the urge just to curl up into a ball and hide from the world. Getting so used to it that it's become second nature, that it's hidden even from me until times like this. I'm not depressed, I'm lost behind a mask or a shell, screaming, crying and fighting to get out but noone can see or hear me, noone can tell that I'm just going through the motions, trying to find a way back to life. How can I say it, who and how can I tell, when I don't even know myself. How can anyone hear me when they don't even know to listen? Help, please? tomcat
  4. tomcat

    Hi all

    Hi all, I just found this site today, and already have become hooked due to the amount of information that I've been able to pick up from it. I'm a 32 year old man who was officially diagnosed as being High Functioning Autistic at the beginning of the year, having had no clue whatsoever for over 30 years. Having lived with my parents/mother and then my aunt all of my life until meeting (online) and getting a place with the woman I love, I've never really been on my own and never had anyone think too much on or worry about my at times almost hermitlike existence, (at home with my mum, we lived out in the country, over a mile from the village, no car, little reason to go anywhere but school, spent most of my time alone in my room listening to music, reading or hiding in the woods, very few friends, you get the idea. No real flashing lights for my mum that I was different. At 17 moved to my Aunt's in the nearby town to work as a cleaner at the local Butlin's, was pretty much the same, worked, read, listened to music and then got my first computer. Had a few friends who would drag me out with them, mainly seemed to get dragged along with the girls as they felt "safe" with me, they knew me as a quiet, soft guy, but big enough to scare any problems away when walking (staggering) home at night. Then after a few years I was pretty much housebound for a few months with severe numbness and loss of feeling in my ankles and feet, by the time they finished the 6 months worth of tests, the problem had disappeared on it's own, along with what little social life I had left with the sole exception of a former workmate/best friend and the friends I made online. Anyway, I never liked going out on my own, my aunt kept me fed, warm, I washed if rarely (and I DO mean RARELY) and I had my friends on the computer to talk to, noone who knew me had any knowledge or information about Autism and just thought I was quiet and strange and left me alone.) When SWMBO came along, life changed, my bed high pile of rubbish, clothes, plates etc around the room was cleaned up, bed replaced, clothes washed, and me made to take a bath..... lol. Now I can laugh about it, then I just froze, ducked my head and did what she told me. I was the luckiest man alive that she didn't just run as soon as she saw me and the way I'd been living, I think she had her first inkling then and there that I was on the spectrum as she used to work with autistic kids of varying degrees, she loved me and saw it as a challenge and something we could work through but never brought it up until a few years later. We got our own place together after a while though she'd been living with me since we met face to face, got first one then a second dog which I'd missed having from at my mum's, moved to a town about 15 miles away from where we were and where my sister lived with her family and she found the local Carers' Centre after a physical, emotional and mental breakdown due in a large part to some of my actions and her employer's taking advantage of her kindness (a well known Scottish care company, had her working anything up to 70 hrs a week at one point, won't go into more detail atm). The subject of my possibly being on the spectrum was brought up and they arranged to have some information sent out from the NAS, it arrived and she brought it up with me, showing me some of the information and asking if there was anything there I recognized in myself, quite a lot to be honest and she noticed some things I didn't, asked for and got a referral to the community mental health team and though neither they nor the doctor had noticed any of the traits agreed to our request for assessment by a psychologist, not informing us that there was a waiting list of up to a year in this area. I was lucky in that I was asked to be a learning case for a psychologist training to assess ASDs with my case being reviewed by those assessing the psychologist after only a couple of months. Several sessions with me and a few with members of my family later and I was finally diagnosed as HFA. I humbly apologize for this finger cramping typing session and I'm sure, eye searing reading session of an introduction. tomcat
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