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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team

trekster

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    nr Bristol
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    stamp collecting, cross stitching, playmobil, star trek, liverpool fc, computers

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  1. I had staff shout in my face and got some money back. I had the same person abuse me mentally and got £30 refund. It is worth complaining whether invisible or visible. I had a written apology each time.
  2. Another newbie :)

    Hello and welcome to the forum. Really hope this forum gives you some ideas of how to navigate this confusing world that is post diagnosis. I'm one of the moderators on here.
  3. Autistic daughter needs help with DT project

    Admin note, normally we require members to ask permission via private message before posting research proposals to the list. In this instance the post can be kept on as it stands. Hope your daughter does well in her project.
  4. "Jazz hands" rather than clapping

    This is not a new thing, the autscape organisation has been using 'jazz hands' since 2005 with success at their annual autistic conferences.
  5. Distance learning autism course?

    Due to my autism I have difficulty answering open questions. But will do my best. For me it was the best investment I could have made. It helped me understand myself and my friends better. I did a case study on myself because I couldn't find anyone else. I didn't get a paid career out of it because my elhers danlos was diagnosed and my mobility and my mentor at the time let me down. I also had to change tutors when trying the masters course. It is an excellent standard workwise. I got a 2:1 in autism as a result. I got my masters in professional development from a different university last year. It helped me decide what I wanted to do with my life. It's just trying to work out how to develop my community interest company to help my organisation to expand.
  6. Why is he so nasty

    Wish I knew what was making him so horrible towards you. I can tease people sometimes but if I see they're upset I back off. Is this recent behaviour or something building up over time? Anything in particular in his life causing him to lash out? Remind me again does he live with you? Can you get respite care from him from social services as a carer for your disabled son? I have been off the rails in the past. For me it was a combination of triggers: 1. Having gluten, dairy, anything ending in the word benzoate, pineapple or tartaric acid anywhere near my mouth or on my skin. 2. Flashbacks from my traumatic past causing me to push others away as I felt I couldn't open up to them. 3. Severe physical pain from my then undiagnosed fibromyalgia and eds/hms every joint in my body apart from my back can dislocate multiple times a day. It is very painful and I'm still getting on top of treating it properly. 4. Hunger and or fatigue caused by not recognising the signs as the timing of this post shows. 5. More changes in the day than I can process and understand especially last minute ones. 6. Clashes with my teenage siblings. 7. People saying things that reminded me of my past or lying to me. 8. Unclear and unrealistic expectations from others I was never able to meet. Most of the above have been resolved bar a few. I'm a better person to get along with when I've been sipping tonic water (to settle cross contamination from gluten and dairy), have taken meds, has plenty of sleep etc and have my own space to process changes and what's expected of me. Really hope you get to the bottom of what's going on ASAP.
  7. Can you book an appointment with him with an asd aware counseller to come to the house and help him? My relative used to do that for me when I was stuck in a duty due to my unrecognised secondary mental health problems. He sounds scared of the world so hides in his safer place of home due to the experiences at primary school. Has he had any support at secondary school that really benefited him? There's a lot of choices regarding what to do and not to when leaving school. It can get overwhelming at times for asd kids. I used to sit around all day in the same clothes and go to bed in them because I couldn't decide what to wear so I stayed in what I was wearing. You mention his computer projects? Is there anyway that can be turned into a career for him? Could he work from home? Either doing his own business or testing computer games and writing up reviews? Also teenager type of problems can last longer in autistics (that's my theory anyway) when I was 23 I woke up one day to find the anxiety had gone and had some years of stability. Nothing in particular happened I think my hormones settled down. Another possibility is that he has a chronic pain condition he's unable to express apart from the depression type behaviours you are seeing. It is very rare that when I'm in physical pain I say "ouch" I can get snappy and grumpy instead though. John clements mentioned in his book "people with autism behaving badly" (despite the title he is very understanding towards those of us on the spectrum). I realise this is a lot to think about and you want the best for your son. Hope you get some answers soon. For context I was dislocating every joint in my body except my back but was unable to express it, also have extreme muscle pain. I am a highly verbal autistic as well just couldn't say "this hurts like hell" like 'normies' can.
  8. Challenging Limits

    Knowing when to delegate a task to someone else is the key. Also finding alternative ways in which to complete a task can be helpful. I can book my car in for a service using an online app or an email. Some companies offer an mot test booking online. You get an email to confirm your test time and booking details. The scheme I'm on means they ring me up to ask for my car to be booked in for an mot. It still stresses me out as I have to plan out a whole day to get it done and I'm under time pressure to do it. When I rang up with a problem with my current car I was asked if I still had the last one. But you have to deliver the last car in order to pick up the next one so that seemed illogical to ask. If you present female at a garage some may try and rip you off, but if you present male or go with a friend being ripped off is less likely. Can't you start the phone call with another person in the room and then if the call goes wrong say "I can't cope with this please speak to (name of person)" or "I can't cope with this please speak to my support worker". Some gp practices can permit email contact but I'm not sure how that would work for booking appointments. If your gp is aware of your difficulties on the phone they may permit email contact. The subject line would be "FAO (your gps name)" if you can't cope with a telephone appointment (where the gp rings you back within a set two hour window) mention that on the email. Only downside of not having telephone appointments is you have to wait longer to see your gp.
  9. New member.

    Hello and welcome I've struggled with food addiction. I cannot have 'just a little bit' of gluten or dairy without wanting to have lots and lots more. I have to abstain from gluten or dairy in order to function in my daily life. There is another book 'aspergers and alcohol drinking to cope' which I'm not sure you've read or not? I've also had some breakdowns due to stress and various other problems mostly services not helping me. Struggling to get mental health support at the moment.
  10. New member

    Hello and welcome to the forum I knew I was an aspie two years before I got diagnosed. I saw the film rainman and I did all but a few things on there. I thought I couldn't be very autistic because there were certain things I didn't do which ironically proves that I am because I was talking all his autistic traits literally. I'm pleased Chris Packham has helped you realise your identity of being an aspie. It takes some getting used to understand and process that realisation. Some areas have aspergers women's groups. There are also some books on aspergers aimed at females on the spectrum. 'Aspergirls' is one that springs to mind. One author of books aimed at females on the spectrum is Robyn Stewart. It is possible to have aspergers and OCD at the same time. If you feel distress at engaging in your obsessions or compulsions that's OCD, if you feel joy or other more positive emotions at engaging with your obsessions then that's an aspie trait. If there's a mixture of the two then you most likely have both. I was diagnosed in 1996 with Asperger syndrome. But I have obsessive hoarding and compulsions about the time. I'm constantly panicking about being late especially when I've left in plenty of time. I've been a compulsive spender in the past as well. I identify as OCD but I don't have an official diagnosis. Getting an official diagnosis can be hard work due to the cuts the NHS have and changes to the diagnostic criterion. Some areas still use ICD-10 (older criterion) others use DSM-5. There are some peer support groups that accept people whether they have a diagnosis of aspergers or autism or not. Official services from the NHS however are a different story. Have you heard of OCD action? https://www.ocdaction.org.uk/support-groups That's a link to the support groups including online support groups.
  11. Anyone in the same boat ?

    I know relate can help with some cases of Asperger families, also couples counselling (sometimes even family counselling). Does he accept he has aspergers and try to find out more about aspergers to help him understand himself and others? Unless you mention the specific issues you are having it is going to be difficult to find someone in the same boat. There are a few Asperger adults on here who are in relationships but unsure how many neurotypical (so called normal) partners of Asperger adults with children there are here.
  12. meet jonny azrim the 30 year old 7 year old

    Hello and welcome My so called father abused me so I am glad he is dead. I am better off without him. He abused my mother as well and she still doesn't accept or realise this to be the case. Due to missing out on a lot in my childhood I feel like a kid trapped in an adults body sometimes. I've found spaces where I can be a kid again. I was told by my so called father "you have an IQ of 5" when I asked him what it was, I've spent since then having to prove to others and myself that I'm "not stupid". My gran was a teacher and was a tremendous support towards me up until 2012 when she became ill with dementia. My signature displays all the extras to my autism/aspergers that I have to manage on a daily (sometimes hourly) basis. My concept of time is very severe as well, when I'm sleeping well and have no had gluten, dairy, benzoates or a panic attack within the past few days I function well. But as my sleep is a problem at the moment I am struggling. The fact you taught yourself to play the piano is an amazing achievement. Do foundation degrees in music require a grade C in maths? Can 'skill' (the bureau of disabled students) help you find a course more suited to your needs? I kept having breakdowns so it took me until my late 30s to get my masters degree. This is partly because I've gone off all gluten, dairy, benzoates (anything ending in the word 'benzoate'), pineapple (due to eds/hms), low aspartame, low msg. I don't know how I have managed to keep going but I've found a way to get through life somehow. I am still fighting the NHS for better services for me, I'm still campaigning on and off for better services for people similar to me. For me I have playmobil figures, star trek, stamp collecting, quiz shows, maps, embroidery and a few others as my hobbies. Gotta go as my volunteer work is on soon and I don't want to be late (again).
  13. Um... Hi!

    Hello and welcome, Introduction posts can take on many forms, we've had members ask for help on various issues some autism related others not. Parents are here, as are a few professionals. Feel free to ask your questions, express your confusion and frustration (preferably not aimed at anyone in particular on here but about a situation). I'm Northern as well, half Scottish and half liverpudlian (or half Irish depending on the day )
  14. I'm a few years younger than yourself. My niece is 5 and has a terminal illness. I think about her on a daily basis even though I can't see her as often as I would prefer. This causes really extreme anxiety. Are you in contact with any cancer charities? I know the national autistic society has a section on bereavement etc but that's aimed at people who know someone is dying or has died. http://www.autism.org.uk/about/family-life/bereavement.aspx Do you have family and friends to support you? Hope you find this forum supportive and helpful in reducing your meltdowns etc. I find the 'Stickman communications' cards to be invaluable in explaining to people what I'm feeling and thinking and my needs at the time.
  15. Admin note: as this has approval from the University ethics committee this research has approval to be advertised on here.
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