Hooverhoarder

Hi, sorry you're feeling so stressed over this, I think seeing one's GP over your suspicions is scary just because it's one thing to suspect you have Aspergers, but another to decide to seek diagnosis. Kind of makes it A Real Thing rather than just a possibility, which can be hard to get one's head around. When I had my initial chat with my GP, I took my mum along. It felt pretty awkward to be a grown man and bringing her, but she's been very supportive, and she did a fair bit of the talking. I was able to get a referral and have recently been formally diagnosed. As Darkshine says, backup can be very helpful, especially when they take you seriously, as your husband does. Wishing you luck, whatever you decide to do!

Hi everyone, just a quick query! About this time last year I went into self-employment after being on long term Incapacity Benefit. Since then, I've received Working Tax Credits - the standard amount, plus the disability element. Should my Applicable Amount regarding Housing and Council Tax Benefit include the allowance for disability, ie the basic personal allowance of what was £65.45 plus the extra £28? If so, would this have been an admin error, as they would have seen my WTC letter that mentions receiving the disability element? Thanks for any help! Simon

Hi Nezza, Welcome, I'm only new myself here, four years older and one foot shorter than you Fully sympathise with any suicidal feelings you've had. Something I've had as well since my mid teens, although mine tends to get triggered by my frustration with dealing with day to day things, which builds up sometimes. Once I decided to investigate the likelihood of having Asperger's further, I read up as much as I could - including this forum's archives - and found out about other traits I hadn't known about, but that applied to me, which further confirmed to me that it might affect me. Worth chatting to a helpline too, it's good to discuss it with someone in the know anonymously, and if there's a helpline local to you they can also advise you of services in your area. Good luck

Saw my doctor on Friday, armed with a list of traits and how I manifest them. It went pretty well, and he agreed to refer me. I'd spoken to the local Austism helpline, who gave me the contact details of the local Community Adult Asperger's Service if he wasn't sure who to refer me to - turns out the surgery had only received details about the service on the 23rd so I guess my timing was spot-on! Lynda, sounds interesting, are you going to put your research online? I'd love to research and visit/photo more of the area myself, but living down south makes it kinda difficult...

Hi Lynda and Dazwan, thanks for your replies! It's only since talking to my mum that I've accepted that a diagnosis of Asperger's is a real probability for me, and that it's something that I should investigate further. I completely agree with both of you that realising that it can be the source of issues helps with planning how to deal with it, instead of getting frustrated at any inabilities or difficulties it might cause. I also kind of feel that it's helping me make peace with myself over aspects of my behaviour that had previously left me angry and frustrated at myself, for my 'weakness' in struggling to deal with mundane stuff and situations. Lynda, fit like! I'm from Aberdeen, but my family moved to England in my teens. The history of Aberdeen and the surrounding areas has always interested me, when I was in my early teens I used to get on yellow buses going all over the place, just to see towns and villages I'd never visited! Going back up there for a family wedding in October Dazwan, I'm convinced that being around the right people can help a lot - I've always been a bit of a loner too, but was lucky to work in two places where I was accepted as a bit eccentric but part of the team, to the extent that I'd actually credit both those jobs (or my ex workmates) with helping me learn to deal with aspects of real life. The issue of disclosure has put me at a bit of a crossroads at the moment, as I'm currently self employed through the old new deal scheme to get those on the sick back to work. The nature of the work means that I'm constantly meeting new customers as I deal with yearly maintenance, but speaking to and meeting new clients feels to me like a job interview, and the anxiety can cause me to manifest some of the physical signs of Asperger's, which in turn makes me more anxious - but I think that mentioning it to prospective customers wouldn't be a good idea. It's a shame, I'm good at the work, just not with the customers So I reckon I have to reassess my work situation. Ultimately, I think disclosure would depend on how much you think it affects your work, and how you think your colleagues would react - although as I think you said, there's been training on it in your workplace, so if you chose to there'd be a greater likelihood of understanding. Glad your diagnosis was straightforward - from what I can tell, provision for adult diagnosis seems to have improved a lot in recent years, just got to get past my GP first Simon

Hello all, I'm Simon, and I'm a 37 year old who's hopefully going to get a referral from my doctor to our local health service Adult Asperger's team. That I might have Aspergers is something I've wondered about for a number of years, but had dismissed as not a problem. But four years ago life started to overwhelm me and I was hit hard by depression and anxiety, leading me to leaving my job after being signed off for a few months, and splitting with my partner, both of which were the reasons for me getting ill, so every cloud etc... Since then, I've been getting myself back together, but have struggled to deal with strangers and those I'm not comfortable with. I explained it to my doctor as feeling that I had lost the ability to put on a confident front, and looking back on it, I believe that I've spent my adult life projecting that front, trying to pass as 'normal'. Life has always felt like I'm being pulled one way to be myself, and another to 'blend in', which has been a constant inner battle. And although looking back I've always had issues with anxiety, I've always been quite dismissive about it and found it frustrating, especially if the situation didn't warrant it when examined logically. I had a chat with my mum about Aspergers and my childhood behaviour, she agreed I had a point and so I've booked the dcotor's appointment (she's coming with me, as I struggle to explain my feelings and tend to play them down). Having her support is a huge relief, as I didn't expect it. Of course, I'm affected by other aspects too, my main obsession has always been hoovers, and I've always had very poor motor skills - I leave laces tied and buttons fastened so I don't have to deal with them, and can only write slowly, which affects me in exams. I'd be really interested to hear how people who received a diagnosis of Asperger's in adulthood dealt with life before diagnosis - did you go 'undercover', or struggle fitting in, or what? And how has diagnosis changed your life? I'm finding it quite reassuring knowing that any stress or anxiety that I might have gotten frustrated about with myself before may have a medical explanation rather than just me having rubbish life skills! Anyway, it's been an eye-opener reading some of the forum posts, I did post on the adult board, but reading the site since has answered some of my questions