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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team

Pinebunny

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  1. Both my daughter and I have Aspergers so I do relate but my circumstances were different. She is 21 and spends most of her days in a darkened room. She complains of feeling ill but won't go to the doctor. Lots of days she won't eat and will only come downstairs if we go out. I've suggested maybe she might consider a place of her own with support but she thinks that's me trying to get rid of her. I believe and she does admit that he a support worker was to tell her to get ready to go out, she probably would whereas it's easy for her to tell her mum that she doesn't feel like it, or will do things later I don't think it's helpful to believe she can just stay at home and live off me and doesn't think she needs to work, even if it's supported. Has anyone come through this?
  2. I'm no expert but my daughter has Asperger's and she had terrible tantrums at the same age. You don't say what other problems your daughter has, but mine has problems with social skills and communication and with hindsight, I think this was exactly what the problem was. In the same way toddlers do this because they can't cope with feeling things aren't going their way and they can't voice their distress any other way than to throw a tantrum. I think it is as equally scary for the person who finds themselves in an explosive rage they can't contain. The way I handled it was to try to make sure she was safe and then had some time to cool down. I would ask her to unpick what happened when she got into a rage. It may be 'I lost my trainer' and I would ask her, 'how can we avoid that happening again?' and she would decide, next time, she would put her trainers where she could find them. I've also had to suggest appropriate phrases to ask for help as she can't always think what to say. Sometimes she communicates better by text. Back then she used messenger and could send me a sad face to let me know something was wrong. You might talk to her about minimising stress. Does she like the exams? If there are too many things going on in her head, it will only make matters worse, so discuss what makes her happy and what causes stress. It is a difficult age. Is she in first year at secondary? Is there stress there? Whether your daughter has AS or not, I think it's good to acknowledge what stress can do to us, and how to manage it in a way she can understand. She still texts me when she can't talk direct and she's 20 now.
  3. Help for 18 year old

    Hi, I am hoping someone will relate and offer some advice. My daughter was diagnosed late and has never got much support other than from family. She dropped out of sixth form last year due to problems with anxiety and now doesn't know what she wants to do. I feel I have been patient with her, suggesting other courses, voluntary work etc to try to get her confidence back up but we are met with silence or sarcastic comments about how she is expected to know what she is going to do for the rest of her life, when actually planning a first step is all I am hoping for. She is not signing on as doesn't feel there is a setting she can work in and all the jobcentre did was offer to send her on courses she can't cope with. I'm not sure where we go from here. She rarely comes out of her room, often says she isn't hungry because she feels sick (hunger pangs!) and falls asleep through the day. I tried to speak to the GP about her but I was told because she is over 18, they won't speak to me. She needs to phone herself but she doesn't use the phone and to be honest, I don't think she has the motivation to want to change anything. She can't seem to understand that she can't be financially dependant on me forever.
  4. dependant adults

    Hi. My daughter had a horrendous time signing on and as it's been making her ill, she is on longer doing so. She would not be entitled to ESA in my opinion, and I am not encouraging her to go down this route. Instead she is doing an online course with a view to go self employed. I met another mother recently whose son is also dependant financially, because he can't physically cope with signing on. I wonder if others are in the same boat? She neede glasses recently and we've had to pay full cost and expect prescriptions etc will be the same.
  5. help with daughter 19

    Thanks for your reply. She did do a bit of volunteering at a disability charity. They were very understanding that she didn't like talking and gave her filing to do. She doesn't want to go back as it's 'boring'. She likes to write scripts and her brother has started taking her to a writers group which meets about once a month. Her special topic is American presidents! Not sure what work would relate to that ;-) I have tried talking to her about volunteering elsewhere but she mostly ignores me. The only time she is animated is if he's little sister plays Mario with her. It's tricky. I looked up about esa. It tells you to have a medical certificate? I don't really want to encourage her to believe she is incapable of work. She is actually a lot like me. My difficulties were shadowed by my strong sense ed any injustice. I volunteered as an adviser and although talking to people was hard, I got a buzz out of helping and it got easier with time. She doesn't believe that I am like her at all.
  6. help with daughter 19

    My daughter has had a tough time with bullying at school and ended up at a special provision for students with anxiety. She did well considering the amount of school she missed and passed her GSCEs. She started her A levels but dropped out as she couldn't cope with the number of people there. She signed on for a time but this was traumatic for her being sent on courses etc. Eventually she decided to a different college. We thought it was going well and we're proud of her achievements but clearly it was not. She had a suicide attempt and turns out she was struggling at college but couldn't face signing on again. I've told her that he's health is more important and not to worry about that for now. I am worried sick about leaving her alone but also realise that she needs some space as an adult. I don't know where we go from here. We've discussed work but all require contact with people and some sort ofssocial skills. Currently she stays in her room a lot and avoids talking. She doesn't want to pursue any mental health help and I can't force her too. Has anyone had similar experiences and found a way forward?
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