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About samantha.wierd

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    Norfolk Broads
  1. I totally understand about why you want a diagnosis. The same as me to access SPECIFIC support. I also refused to attend. I was considered a Gifted/talented child at school, and was also predicted very good grades. I was always ambitious. Very well behaved at school. A model pupil in a way. It was the social expectations and pressures that made me give up. I did go on to get english and maths gcse before I got my job. I always felt I let myself down giving up but I had no choice in my mind. I have been quite reclusive since. But it comes in bouts like my depression.. I also have huge social and general anxiety. As for romantic interests. When we met I think I hid everything so well he even though t I was a normal person for about a year. That is some masking and it is seriously exhausting. Do you feel like you are just acting through life? Always just pretending to be like everyone else? Well done and massive cpngrats on your degree thats an amazing achievement and you should be so proud. I hope and wish so much ill be able to go to university one day. I am hugely interested in psychology. .. another reason im like a dog without a bone.
  2. My education was patchy I left school at 14 due to the social aspect and pressure I just could not continue so I spent my days either alone walking.the years between 14 and 18 were horrendous and very hard for me.many failed suicide attempts which I believe were cries for help, I did get a job which I loved at 18. I was so lucky. I was training to be an estate agent. I was so impressed. Pressure builds up and it eventually got too difficult to do my job after 3 years I was dismissed for various errors. I was still masking muself to be a normal person so there was no support for me. I compromised myself as a teen and did things I didn't want to do yo make friends whoch never worked either. I am so sorry if im being selfish talking abouy me me me. I read everything your typing I jist seem to turn everything back to myself. I also have a young son whos nearly 3 now and I live with the man of my dreams. I love my family. I also have problems at home. Due to my anxiety, sensory issues and its damn right hard loving me lol.
  3. Thankyou for replying pink lemon. Do you know how long the referral process will take you? Where I am from in Derbyshire due to staffing levels and funding there is a wait of between 24-36 months. Its mad I go through different obsessions and whilst waiting for my assessment it was all I could focus on ( I have to try and keep it inside though as people get fed up of me obsessing. Now its over I don't know what to do. Well I know I have to wait and I know I shouldn't be putting my life on hold as funny as that sounds because outside of my four walls I dont have a life. There is nothing to put on hold but I know I should be trying to achieve something regardless pf autism or not . You say you dont know if you are coping do you strugglr with depression too? I have been diagnosed or misdiagnosed as may be the case with a number of 'comorbid conditions'
  4. Im relying way too much on the report to tell me who I am. Im scared this will send me deeper into depression if I dont find out who I am. I also know Iit could be wrong then ill be back to square one thinking why am o different to everybody else and have been forever. At least while autism is a possibility I am not questioning myself anymore but like I say if I do not have autism i will be back to wondering and torturing myself seeing my obvious differences and tryong to work out why aimlessly. Failing miserably and pissing people off on the way. Ps apologies for my punctuation if this is difficult to read. I have clumsy fingers and im on my phone where thr button s are small and hard enough themselves to get right. Someobe please reply
  5. This is my first post. Is there anyone out there reading
  6. Hi everyone, Its been an exhausting road but I pushed for an assessment at 22. Waited for 2 years no problem at all as I ccould keep checking where I am on the list. Have now had the assessment but the report could take as long as may. How do I cope with waiting without obsessing and it taking over my life? ??
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