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Posts posted by bid

  1. Posted · Report reply

    Oh dear laydees...do you think I need to hand back my diagnosis, 'cos I can't do sums/pooters/technology!! :o:shame:

     

    I only liiiike sparklies/shoes/clothes...

     

    :clap::dance:

     

    Boho Bid, the Original Lipstick Aspie!! :curlers:

  2. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    Hi Forgetmenot,

     

    What consequences do you give your child when they behave as you describe?

     

    Whatever difficulties/diagnosis a child has, the fundamental approach is always to have clear consequences that really mean something to the child and firm boundaries when it comes to behavioural issues.

     

    (There is also no need to be rude to BD.)

     

    Bid :)

  4. Posted · Report reply

    Gosh, didn't think you'd be able to read that comment with your middle-aged eyes... :whistle:

     

    BTW, if we have lives to get on with, what are we doing on this forum... :unsure::lol:

     

    Do not jest...I'm holding out against varifocals at the mo!! Have to keep putting my specs on top of my head to sew/read as if I keep them on I'm holding things at arm's length!! :shame:

     

    And personally, I'm wiling away the time before my usual mad, 'late' dash to get ready for work! ;):lol:

     

    Bid :)

  6. Posted · Report reply

    :notworthy: :notworthy: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap::thumbs::first:

     

    Thanks Mumbley...I'm increasingly feeling very middle-aged as I appear to be very 'old school' these days!! :o

     

    Old school it may be, but I think there is a lot to be said for just getting on with things, taking personal responsibility and making the very best of what you have.

     

    Bid :)

  7. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    Again, absolutely agree Mumble...and your point echoes the thread I started about the conference my DH attended a few months ago about the huge number of children now moving into the education system who were very premature and as a consequence have the most complex of special needs :

     

    http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/Index.php?/topic/26382-new-generation-of-complex-learning-difficulties-and-disabilities/page__p__305030__fromsearch__1#entry305030

     

    What I meant was the other angle that there are very many people who still wouldn't recognise the joy and quality of life possible for many profoundly disabled people because they are not able to see past their own prejudices and fear, however many films they were made to watch.

     

    Bid :)

  8. Posted · Report reply

    This show, IMO, is one of the best programmes ever made on disability, and should be required (nay forced) viewing for those with black and white views on things like in-utero screening or the wider issues of eugenics and the 'value' of disabled people's lives.

     

     

     

     

    Completely agree, BD...but sadly I think there is a great raft of people who still wouldn't understand :wallbash:

     

    Bid :(

  9. Posted · Report reply

    I just wanted to let you know that I really feel for you, as my DD has gone into anaphylactic shock twice and my DS once (they have severe multiple food allergies) and it's a truly terrifying expereince >:D<<'>

     

    Did the hospital establish what it was about the MMR that caused the anapylaxis?

     

    Bid >:D<<'>

  10. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    Ok, as an adult with a dx of AS, my take on this is: you have to decide what you want from your life.

     

    If you want to live a largely solitary life then go ahead and be your undiluted autistic yourself, just being how you want to be...but don't then moan about living a largely solitary life!

     

    If, on the other hand, you would like a family, a job, a productive life that makes a decent contribution to your wider society, then yes, you will have to look at how other people behave, act and react, and then model that.

     

    I realised this when I was about 17ish, and have done it ever since with varying degrees of success depending on the circumstances. For example, I wanted/needed to work and this has probably been the largest area in my life where I have had to model my behaviour on others. Yes, it can be exhausting, I still don't really 'get' why I need to do a fair amount a lot of the time...but the reward of doing a job I love well far outweighs all of that.

     

    Conversely, I've given up now on trying to have close friends as I have never managed this successfully. I have my family, and a few work colleagues who I know care about me and that does for me. But that is my choice...I don't moan about having no close friends and blame it on ASD.

     

    So, as I said before, you have to decide what you want from life and adapt as best you can accordingly. IMO absolutely no point in moaning that it's an 'unfair NT world'...that's just the way it is, so best get cracking and enjoy the life you want :thumbs:

     

    Bid :)

  13. Posted · Report reply

    One thing to consider is the fact that it is very, very difficult to deal with things if you are struggling with anxiety or depression. Sometimes meds are needed to enable you deal with the very things that might have been contributing to the anxiety/depression in the first place.

     

    Bid :)

  15. Posted · Report reply

    Hi Jade,

     

    I took Citalopram a few years ago, and I found it very, very good. The only down side I seem to remember was a little bit of nausea for the first couple of weeks, which is a common side effect as you get used to the meds, but it wasn't anything too awful.

     

    I found it got rid of the constant feeling of panic I had. And once that went, I was amazed at how 'used' I had got to feeling like that, and what a wonderful release it was to be free of that feeling.

     

    Hope that helps a little.

     

    Bid :)

  18. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    Warms the heart to hear from people that care :)

    Thank you Lisa :D

     

    I have to say I really love my job, work with some wonderful young people and lead a really fab team of colleagues. I look forward to going in to work (mostly ;)) and feel very lucky to work where I do.

     

    Bid :)

  20. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    Hi BaffledOwl :)

     

    I have worked for 6 1/2 years at a residential school for children with complex health needs and a range of severe learning difficulties.

     

    For the first two years I worked part-time as day staff on the residential home units. I have always loved my job, but did find being day staff extremely tiring. I found the unstructured times very difficult, and often things could be very noisy.

     

    After two years I changed to work full-time as waking night staff, and I have really found my niche. We have a very clear structure and routine to the night, and it is much quieter. Although I have to deal with emergency situations (most of the young people I work with have severe epilepsy and we are trained to give emergency medication), there is a nurse sleeping in who I can call if I'm worried. Plus, the clear structure and less noise means I have the emotional and intellectual resources to be able to respond with initiative to difficult situations. During the day I was expending all my energy on coping with the lack of structute and the noise.

     

    One bit of advice I would give is that you need to be prepared to think and act flexibly. In difficult/emergency situations, it's not always possible to do everything according to the usual routine or plan.

     

    Best of luck,

     

    Bid :)

  21. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    I didn't say she is odd because she has ASD, but she is just an odd person. The reason I think she is the one who has ASD and not her son is because all the problems eminate from her.

     

    Why on earth would having ASD mean all the problems eminate from her??

     

    From what you describe, your stepson's mum certainly appears to have problems, but why would you ascribe those to a casual home diagnosis of ASD?? Surely you are doing exactly what you are accusing her of doing?! In a previous post you also mentioned that your father has Aspergers...I wonder now was this a formal dx? :blink:

     

    Bid :)

  25. Posted · Edited by bid · Report reply

    That's what I understood from the programme too Darkshine.

     

    We have nurses present 24 hours a day and waking night staff at my school, which is why we can care for children with Shelby's level of complex needs (from what I could see she has a gastrostomy tube fitted for meds and presumably liquid feeds).

     

    Bid :)

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