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oracle

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Posts posted by oracle

  1. Posted · Report reply

    I can't see anything wrong with this topic nor anything funny - sorry. I always thought that this was the place for help and advice for those living with ASD. Antia has a problem that she needs help and s e x is part of most peoples lives.

     

    Emily I think your response was very informative and I hope that it helps Anita.

     

    Oracle

  4. Posted · Report reply

    You will need to get a letter from the Pead or your doctor saying that your child is unable to attend school at the moment due to her ill health. I strongly recommend that you do this even if it is a short term arrangement - without this letter your child will be marked down as a none attender and you will get a visit from an EWO sooner rather than later.

     

    Hope this helps.

     

    Oracle

  5. Posted · Edited by oracle · Report reply

    Moira the Norfolk Broads is not showing where you live it's an idicator of how many posts you have made. The more posts you make the higher the hill/mountain you will be associated with. Hope this makes sense. Just check my rather HUGE mountain out underneath my name. It's certainly not where I live :lol:

     

    Oracle

  6. Posted · Report reply

    I know this little girl quite well and she does not have behavioural problems - well not the aggressive kind that have been implied. She is a little giggler and never once hurt any of the children in any way. The behaviour which happened only 'once' was not even because of her disibility.

     

    Oracle

  9. Posted · Report reply

    Although it was difficult viewing I think it was worth watching and I found it more realistic than the idealised and soppy drama The Magnificent Seven (apologies for not agreeing with other members) - as you say personal experiences influence what you think of it.

     

    I am with you Curra. Lot's of it hit home to me and was just a little too close for comfort. Whatever the problem the services let them down and looking after an adult with AS is a world away from looking after a child with it - but then I suppose you have to reach that point before you can fully understand.

     

    Oracle

  11. Posted · Edited by oracle · Report reply

    On this one I do agree - I just think you have to remove the 'ASD' from the equation and type 'young adult'... There's a fairly famous poem about it:

     

    Actually most of the adults that I know with ASD are aged 30 to late 50's and every rotten thing that ever happened to them was brought about by their parents. There is only one exception in my circle and my friends, same age as me late 40's, has a huge love and respect for his Mum but not his Dad,

     

    I have encountered fabrication and I know that it does happen but it is very very rare and sadly along with jb I have sat in a Consulting Room where my husband and I were utterly convinced that we were being observed for Munchausen's, and even though I now believe that there are some parents who do fabricate I am still a staunch Campaigner to get rid of this stigma that is following parents who have ASD children around. An occassional parent does not make us all candidates for MSBP/Fabricating Illness call it what you will.

     

    Oracle

  12. Posted · Report reply

    I think the 'new' term for MSBP is Fabricating Illness. Some parents do this to draw attention to themselves and are usually experts on their chosen subject. If it sounds as if I know what I am talking about then maybe that is because I have encountered this and it is very scary and very convincing. So I don't ever believe that parents are beyond fabricating things to meet their own needs. But I would hope that this would not go un-noticed for years and years as it has done in this case.

     

    Now for a public stoning. I know lots of adults with ASD now and I have to say that very few of them indeed have anything nice to say about their parents. No matter what their parents did or did not do, they did not do it right on in their child's best interest according to their children. I came to this conclusion a couple of years ago now and I also have an adult son myself I can see how this can become an issue. This is purely a personal observation and can only be based on my own experiences and posts I have read here and on other forums made by adults with ASD. Now before the stones are put down and replaced with heavy duty rifles I do know some adults who have nothing but praise for their parents, but those who tell a different story are greatly out numbered by those who feel that their parents have a lot to answer for. I have thought for a long while that we are damned if we do and damned if we don't. This proves nothing at all but it does give me something to ponder.

     

    Oracle

  13. Posted · Edited by oracle · Report reply

    If all of this has now been proven that it is the Mother and not the Daughter who has the problems, and reading through this thread it strongly suggests that this is the case, even though the Mothers Lawyer was still making statments about the system failing these parents in April of this year, so when was it proven? I am holding my hands up and admit that I am wrong - how are they going to be allowed to show the programme made about the family which, if the report that I have just read is correct, will portray this as being the system which has failed the parents? How will they get round that because it is being billed as a "powerful story will go a long way towards raising awareness of Asperger's syndrome." Well not if it is actually based around lies that have be proven what it will do is to once again raise the curtain on fabricating illness aka as MSBP and parents who have autistic children :crying: .

     

     

    Oracle

  15. Posted · Edited by oracle · Report reply

    From my knowledge the dx is not a home grown one.

     

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/merseyside/4046053.stm

     

    Even if the daughter IS autistic or asperger, why the assumption that that is the reason for he 'obsession' with designer clothes and spending and her ill treatment of her parents? There are THOUSANDS of people who are in debt up to their eyeballs, who would beg steal and cheat their parents to sustain that life style and who would show no remorse whatsoever. Are they ALL autistic??

     

    Absoutley not - BUT - from my understanding of this and of course it has been gained via the press and other sites http://www.learningdisabilities.org.uk/pro...830&print=1 also on some of the other group where I am also a member, that this was a full blown auti obsession and there are many of us here who must understand what it is like to live with full blown obsessions no matter what they are or how they manifest.

     

    I have to say that my concern was that they did not just draw a line under this obsession as many of us have to but we also know what living with the fall out can be like. This woman no matter what her dx had been sectioned because of mental health problems but was then released within a few months. From what I gather her parents had been screaming for help for years - their daughter was a formidable young woman.

     

    Additionally, without wishing to trivialise the situation or ignore the very genuine distress and anguish of the parents, these are hardly typical responses, are they?

     

    Desperate I would say and having helped many hundreds of parents I see it on a daily basis.

     

    To the best of my knowledge, people don't commit suicide because they are 'pushed' into it - they do so because they have mental health/social/physical problems that are not being appropriately responded to. Blame society, blame social services, blame the NHS by all means, but to lay the blame for that on one individual seems like the worst sort of cop out, no matter how much that individual may (or may not) have contributed to the whole picture...

     

    I don't think that one person is being blamed.

     

    You know we are damned if we do and damned if we don't. I suppose they could have just walked away but then if you read some of the posts that are up on Awares posted by adults with autism and what happens after people do walk away it is simply horrifying. Suicide is walking away but it's also the most desperate way of pointing out that the needs of this family and the person with autism were not being met and I suppose one last hope that someone will listen.

     

    We all have our limits and none of us know what we may or may not do if we are pushed too far.

     

    Oracle

  20. Posted · Edited by nellie · Report reply

    xxxxxxx (edited to comply with forum rules and guidelines) has certainly been active in similar areas, although I don't how you could contact her.

     

    I do.

     

    The thing is xxx (edited to comply with forum rules and guidelines) will remember Debbie - God I remember Debbie :crying: and don't want to see this happen again. Five Live will remember Debbie and Simon will remember Debbie he dx'd her sons when everyone else said that Debbie was the problem.

     

    I have the broadcast should anyone need it I also have one more name who if necessary I am willing to contact should all of the above fail to come through.

     

    Oracle

  21. Posted · Report reply

    The journey of a 1000 miles always begins with the first step. You have done all that you need to do for now - the nest step is if and when he begins to ask you questions. Again I would keep it simple and try and sound as positive as you can. I think he has a great way of thinking for what it's worth - sounds like an OK young man to me :clap: Better to grow up with and into a dx then to feel it like a sledge hammer blow.

     

    Oracle

  23. Posted · Edited by nellie · Report reply

    Paula is Oliver Cyriax halping you? He's heading the MSBP enquiry for MP's and there is also another guy called xxxxxxxxx (included this name in my pm) who does the same kind of work. And then there is xxxxxxx (edited to comply with forum rules and guidelines)

    Has anyone ever patched you up with any of these people? If you are looking for publicity go to Five Live and ask them about the piece they did on Debbie Storey. It was called the Curious Battle and it turned out to be massive. The programme maker was Matthew Chapman and I was on the broadcast with Debbie who was in a similar situation as yourself. Five Live may just do somthing?

     

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/print/0,,5024746-105248,00.html

     

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/3687612.stm

     

    http://www.connects.org.uk/profilenews.cfm?id=6573

     

    check these out.

     

    Carole

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