llisa32

Morning all I'm not especially annoyed....but I guess I teensy bit peeved...... I bumped into the headmaster this morning and he asked how things were going...I said that we'd got a diagnosis over the holidays of High Functioning Autism. He then said 'Ah....yeah....that makes a lot of sense'...followed up by .'yeah...that makes sense, we're not 'allowed' to say anything, but that makes sense to me' Now....if he had said something it would have saved me a fair bit of having to put up with some peeps treating me like I was neurotic!....but I'm curious.....why can they not 'voice' their suspicions to the parents??

You're not making me smoke Mumble, and you're definately not adding to my stress <'> I'm just cross with yr halls peeps on yr behalf.... I think you're right not to say they are trying to put it right if thus far they are not! I hope you manage a phrase that you are happy with, but def mention not your error <'>

OOOOO.....I've had to have a ciggie so's I don't say bad things bout yr accomodation person and get myself moderated!! I'm gonna take a guess at the current sitation this morning.... DW/Halls have 'suggested' that to alleviate the current harrassment you are getting as a result of their huge mess up by (a) telling the wrong bunch of students off for making noise...and (2) letting those same students know who it was that complained, that 'YOU' apologise to the same bunch of students for the misunderstanding?? Is that what you have been asked?? if so....then no...the only thing I could think off that you could say to the students would be 'Halls and DW got it all wrong, and are now trying to put it right - sorry if you were cross about getting told off. But....my opinion is that DW and Halls peeps should be running round to all of those students as fast as there clompy feet will let them apologising for 'THEIR' error And....DW and Halls should definately be the ones running around making huge apologetic noises wayyyyy before you make/if you make any comment to students - and if you do make any comment make sure you are not apologising on your behalf....you would merely say you were sorry for them that halls and dw got it wrong. You have done nothing at all wrong <'> the above suggested comment for your 'apology' are just part of the nicecities thing that baddad mentions in part a of his post

Thanks all for your replies <'> I think J is ready to know, he's definately very 'aware' of the differences between him and some of his peers and to a large degree I think this is why he has settled much better into the other form class. Bagpuss - I'll take a look at that book - thanks <'> Thanks dee for the book name - I'll take a look at that one too <'> Mumble - yep, your idea is kind of how I'm thinking <'> I'll take things re the dyslexia as without a doubt the one to one help with grasping phonics etc has most definately aided him with reading and he now reads above his age level as oppsed to a couple of years below. Guess I'll just wait the the 'right moment' now

Hi, A couple of times this past week J has said things about actions of his and related them to 'Dyslexia'.... We now know he's not Dyslexic, but he is High Functioning Autistic - I've checked with J's dad and he's happy for me to explain to J about the diagnosis and that he does not have dyslexia etc, so I'll go for it whenever the right 'moment' appears in the near future. That right moment could be tomorrow - it might be Friday or next week, but I believe he's ready to know and that it will help him understand why he sometimes feel's 'different' to his peers (J's words) J's 8.5 yrs old...how have you guys approached it? I have some ideas on what to say to him as I know whats been bothering him re difficulties, but be very intrested to know how others have approached this issue, and how did your child accept the 'news'. I don't think J will be upset about it, but I'm going to need to be careful about how I explain he's no longer Dyslexic, as I don't want him to lose faith in teachers etc (as in he'll think they got it wrong before...which they did! - I know ...but...) Any thoughts welcomes pls <'>

awwww.....keep thinking it's good ....it's good.... I can only imagine how you're feeling - something like nervous excitement I guess! Hope he's back in a min and lets you share the smarties <'>

Has she at any point apologised for her almighty ###### up or is she just disregarding that bit and acting like she has followed procedure??

Mumble....I suspect she is talking out of her backside!! - like you say the only thing anyone would notice was if they had already made a note of that particular thread and wanted to search for it again. Hopefully one of the mods/admins on here can give us a better idea but I can't think of anything else that might occur <'>

I've actually had a not bad week (except for hammy going to heaven etc .....but I think I need to have a good scream on this thread on Mumbles behalf re that poxy useless DW!!!! She is soooo fliippin useless and it makes me despair to think we run the risk of our kids bumping into her if they decide to go to uni etc - may as well send em out to sea without a life jacket!! So....ARGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

And.....no way at all under any circunstances should either the Halls manager or the DW have let it be known who complained!! That is totally and utterly unacceptable and you need to let your sup and tutor know asap - you cannot work at the level you need to under these circumstances <'> <'>

Hiya <'> I think if I wrote what i think about your DW I'd get moderated! - what a stupid woman! I don't think you can afford to not say anything to DW and your sup asap for the sake of your own wellbeing. You are just gonna get more and more stresed and she absolutely should sort this out with halls peeps tomorrow or she finds you somewhere more suitable to stay asap. I think you should ask your sup , ....or thinking bout it....is the halls manager more approachable than DW?? - if so perhaps you should email her explaining DW's massive *** up! and saying how much more distress they have now caused you and can she please help you? If you mail halls manager, then cc DW and sup as well. I'm so sorry you are being treated like this - it's making me fume, totally unacceptable Stay strong and remember you are in the right <'>

Well....Hammy got buried last night and J put a rose in the ground with him Today the girls from next door helped him make a tombstone so we now have one of those in freshly painted glory in the front flower bed! J put an arrow on the 'tombstone' pointing downwards just incase anyone was in any doubt where he was.... He hasn't decided if he wants a new pet or not but seems to be a bit happier now he's given him a 'send off'

Well....it didn't go well today J got home at 3pm and brought his friend in for a quick xbox game - and straight away noticed the hamster wasn't in his cage. Had to tell him then he'd died and he burst straight into tears, went into the corner of the room and stayed there crying for 45 minutes... I sent everyone home, and got him talking...then his friend from next door (girl who's 3.5 yrs older) knocked for him - she came in and was great with him He said he doesn't want to go to the party he was invited to in the morning because he will be burying his hamster I've said it's fine with me whatever he wants to do, so fingers crossed re the rest of the weekend.

Hiya - J is now 8 and was 7 when I went to the GP expressing my concerns. GP then referred to Camhs. After the first assessment at Camhs they said social and communication difficulties and that they would 'monitor' the situation. At that time school had not noticed as many difficulties as I had. That was in July 07 - once my son moved into year 3 in Sept 07 thats when everyone agreed there was a problem. He had anxiety attacks, school refusal, meltdowns etc. In Oct 07 Camhs referred us for a 'multidisciplinary assessment' which basically for us involved a Psychiatrist at Camhs conducting an ADOS and DISCO assessment (they also spoke to school). We've had an Ed Psychologist assessment both at home and at school and the Ed Psych also spoke with the school. Also had a Speech and Language assessment. It felt like a lot of assessments but I'm actually really pleased that we had them all as the information gauged has been invaluable in trying to work out how best to support my son. The school have been making changes since Xmas to accomodate J in lessons, and I'm hopeful now that with a firm diagnosis they will continue to be accomodating. He currently does not have any one to one support, but he will require that for any future tests/exams. If you need any more info feel free to pm me <'>

Well.....hubby picked up the hamsters house and shook it - nuffink His consensus is that hammy is stiff, cold and gone to hammy heaven Now....I'm not sure what to do re 'burial'....J has gone for his first ever sleep over at a friends house tonight and is currently unaware Hamster has died. Do you think I should make sure he's safely covered in/over etc and store him in the garage until J's home tomorrow incase he wants a 'burial'?? Difficult to know wether he's going to be upset or not with J...but least that way he has a choice in what happens to him

Hi - I think J's hamster might have died ....do hamsters 'hibernate'? He went into his little house some point yesterday morning and hasn't moved since!! He's eaten no hammy treats or food and no amount of rattling the cage has got him outta his house! Do hamsters hibernate or has he gone for a really long like 'forever' sleep?? I can't bring myself to prod him, so waiting for hubby to get home to do that

Thanks all for the thoughts <'> It has been a weird day today....I am very relieved to finally have a diagnosis, and last night i felt really really tired - almost like I'd suddenly relaxed all at once! I've spent the day kinda working, but mulling things over in the background, not gonna think about 'next steps' till next week now - gonna give my brain a rest for a week Thanks again for all the support in helping me to get this far - very very much appreciated !! <'>

Happy Birthday Bid <'> Hope you have a great day

Hi Mumble, This absolutely must break the rules of confidentiality - particularly within the confines of her role - I can't believe she has been so stupid and thoughtless - actually....scrap that...yes I can believe it! Totally wrong - and for me it proves even more that she is well out of her depth within her role - what did she post the mail for? - was she asking for advice on how to support you? This really should get taken to her superiors, and please please let either a rhino or a friendly witch speak to someone on yr behalf <'>

God I hate that stupid lazy ignorant witch of a DW you have ended up with!! I know you'll be feeling really upset right now but please don't let this woman bring your confidence down - she is totally and utterly incapable of doing her job and to be honest I think if you got any of the discrimination groups involved you'd have a very good case. I know you've said before that if you create a fuss about your treatment then you'll feel like 'you'll be causing trouble at uni' - but the people that are sposed to be supporting you - ie - 'her'... at the moment are doing a totally abysmal job and I am utterly appalled at her treatment of you - both today and in the past. I really do think it's time you let someone else get involved on your behalf, and I'm equally sure this will not result in you 'getting into trouble' - I'm hoping some others will come along on this thread and agree with this point so that we can convince you <'> Please please remember you have done nothing wrong - at all!!, you are being treated appallingly, and it's completely wrong. I feel this woman who is supposed to be providing support actually takes advantage of your AS and uses it to her advantage to lessen her workload - I don't generally think the worst of people but in her case I think it's justified. I hope you're okay - I'll pm u in a sec <'> <'>

Hi, Was back at CAMHS today to go through all of the assessment reports etc and they have given the official diagnosis as High Functioning Autism. The consultant I saw today was really nice and helpful, and she will write to the school with the diagnosis and ask that they in future make special arrangements for any tests/exams etc. And also to ask them to include some social comms stuff into his current IEP. She's told me I can mail/ring her any time I have any further questions/concerns, and she has also offered to run through the diagnosis and what it means with J if we would like them to do that. I haven't decided on that yet - in terms of who will tell him (although we will tell him). So....a very tiring last year but I feel worth it now as we all have a much better understanding of J and what things cause him difficulties etc, which in turn means we can help him with his anxiety. She did say the only reason they decided on HFA rather than AS was because of the delayed early milestones re language development. Now gonna go have a well earnt cup of tea!!

Hi - just an update.... 5 out of 10 seeds have sprouted!!! With proper ickle leaves and everything!! J's really pleased

Hiya, I don't really know what is 'normal' but in my experience I have spoken to the Ed psch on the phone to give various updates/get her thoughts, exchanged emails, and been given feedback after each school meeting. I've then had the report faxed to me so that I get the information before the school does. I would ask the school for the Ed Pschs phone number, they must have it. Then just phone the Psch, say you're aware she's been into school etc and was wondering when she might want some additional info from yourself? I'd personally feel really aggrieved if I'd had no comms with the Ed psch - I may have just been lucky with mine , but I do feel they should have some input from you. Good luck <'>

I'll join you for some witch burning!! tell u what.....we'll add in my fav 'dyslexia' teaching experts and it will be a fantastic bonfire!! The people you work with in terms of prof's etc accept you for who you are because they are 'open' to individuals and do not hold preconceptions of how 'you' should behave. Unfortunately I think you have been lumbered with a very dumb and lazy disability officer who is completely 'out of her comfort zone' with regards to helping you.....she doesn't have a clue how best to assist you - obviously dislikes it when suggestions are made to her about how she might assist you - thus she then choses the easiest route for her....she does nuthin!!! I think it is high time she did get well and truely told how much her lack of support is hindering you Go Mumble!!!

Hi - I love this post!! - you sound really positive about what the future might hold which is great and a real inspiration More importantly you come across as being content with yourself <'> You've had a real 'journey' in the last year, but a year down the line I think you're much more confident being 'you' than before. I hope my J grows up to be as determined to strive for his goals as you! <'>