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      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   06/04/2017

      Depression, Mental Health and Crisis Support   Depression and other mental health difficulties are common amongst people on the autistic spectrum and their carers.   People who are affected by general mental health difficulties are encouraged to receive and share information, support and advice with other forum members, though it is important to point out that this exchange of information is generally based on personal experience and opinions, and is not a substitute for professional medical help.   There is a list of sources of mental health support here: <a href="http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=18801" target="_blank">Mental Health Resources link</a>   People may experience a more serious crisis with their mental health and need urgent medical assistance and advice. However well intentioned, this is not an area of support that the forum can or should be attempting to offer and we would urge members who are feeling at risk of self-harm or suicide to contact either their own GP/health centre, or if out of hours contact NHS Direct on 0845 4647 or to call emergency services 999.   We want to reassure members that they have our full support in offering and seeking advice and information on general mental health issues. Members asking for information in order to help a person in their care are seeking to empower both themselves and those they represent, and we would naturally welcome any such dialogue on the forum.   However, any posts which are deemed to contain inference of personal intent to self-harm and/or suicide will be removed from the forum and that person will be contacted via the pm system with advice on where to seek appropriate help.   In addition to the post being removed, if a forum member is deemed to indicate an immediate risk to themselves, and are unable to be contacted via the pm system, the moderating team will take steps to ensure that person's safety. This may involve breaking previous confidentiality agreements and/or contacting the emergency services on that person's behalf.   Sometimes posts referring to self-harm do not indicate an immediate risk, but they may contain material which others find inappropriate or distressing. This type of post will also be removed from the public forum at the moderator's/administrator's discretion, considering the forum user base as a whole.   If any member receives a PM indicating an immediate risk and is not in a position (or does not want) to intervene, they should forward the PM to the moderating team, who will deal with the disclosure in accordance with the above guidelines.   We trust all members will appreciate the reasoning behind these guidelines, and our intention to urge any member struggling with suicidal feelings to seek and receive approproiate support from trained and experienced professional resources.   The forum guidelines have been updated to reflect the above.   Regards,   The mod/admin team

oxgirl

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  1. A-Hole (Asperger hole)

    I used to get like this a lot when I was younger, raging and feeling out-of-control like I just couldn't get a hold of myself and control myself. It would get so bad, I'd smash things and hurt myself and I didn't even know really how it had started or come about but seemed to always stem from some sort of frustration or feeling of lack of control or inability to change something or express myself which led to uncontrollable rage. You don't say how old you are, but with me it certainly got a lot better as I got older. I think you just learn to get a hold of yourself more as you get older and mature. What I found did really help as I got older was that I started to recognise what would set me off and I could learn to stop before I got past the point of no return. For instance, I am obsessed when it comes to hovering, once I start the job I have to complete the task in a particular order and if I should be interrupted or unable to complete the routine, I just could not cope. Once the hoover actually broke down when I was halfway through my routine. I couldn't cope, I didn't know how to cope and ended up having the most enormous meltdown and injuring myself quite badly. I went on for hours and just didn't know how to stop. Now I'm much better at walking away before I get to the point when I know I won't be able to come back and it's just something you have to learn by experience and it does make life an awful lost easier and less stressful when you do learn it. ~ Mel ~
  2. Update on Glen: Sectioned again

    Good news, Jeanne. Hope the good progress continues. ~ Mel ~
  3. Back in Time

    Could be that he's just remembering those unhappy days, Jeanne and doesn't know how else to express it other than saying he doesn't want it. Maybe it's his way of saying he didn't like it or he wished it had been different but hasn't the vocabulary to say it that way so can only say it in his own words. Or maybe he worries that he will have to go back to school one day and needs reassuring that he won't ever have to go there again. ~ Mel ~
  4. My son 32 just spent 10 days on life support

    Hi jan, you've obviously been through an extremely traumatic experience with your son fighting for his life. I think you both need some time to recover from the effects that that has bound to have had upon you both. I personally wouldn't go rushing in with your discussion about possible Asperger's at the moment, give it a bit of time. Concentrate on getting YOUR strength back and also getting him back to fitness. When he is as well as can be expected, then would be a good time to sit quietly with him and talk about your concerns and what you think he needs to do to help himself and the future. You say he spends most of his time in his room. Is he on jobseekers allowance or is he actually looking for work? Could you encourage him to help out in a charity shop for some hours a week to get him out of the house. At the end of the day, it is your house, and presumably you don't want him dossing about indoors all day without contributing anything. You don't say if you yourself work or get some respite for yourself, because it is a strain having a grown up child living with you. It could be good maybe to set some ground rules, in that he does at least help with cleaning the house or shopping or comes out for walks or something, rather than just allowing him to sit in his room all day, which obviously isn't healthy for anyone, as you well know. Does he go out with his girlfriend at all and where does he get the alcohol from or the money for it? Good luck with it. ~ Mel ~
  5. School transport issues

    Great news, KezT, well done you! ~ Mel ~
  6. Censorship of these forums.

    I don't want to see swearing on here, no. Keep your foul mouth to yourself, is what I think. ~ Mel ~
  7. Aspie son voted

    Great news, Paula, that your lad is doing so well, a lot of which is down to your hard work so you should be proud. My lad also voted. He wasn't sure at first, but I encouraged him to be part of it even if he didn't have strong views and I'm proud that he did it. ~ Mel ~
  8. ESA first claim help please

    Great news, di30 and well done. ~ Mel ~
  9. What do I expect??

    Hi penny23465, sorry you've had such a tough time with your daughter for all these years. I can't help with what to expect at the assessment, I'm afraid, as the assessment for my son was when he was 4 years old, so probably very different from an adult assessment. He is 22 now and it has been a tough road, even with a dx. I wish you both well with the appointment and hope it brings all the answers and help that you both need. ~ Mel ~
  10. Reading back through my son's school annual review reports and statement reports I would not recognise him as the person he is today. He has none of the traits that he had as a child, but I guess he has different problems, adults problems with fitting into the adult world. I don't think he would get a dx now, would rather just be seen as shy and withdrawn. He is so much more aware of himself and his behaviour and how they appear to others and understands so much more of the world and is more aware of others, that I guess he has just learnt to 'cope' better in a lot of ways. He is still autistic but just presents differently I think. Interesting. ~ Mel ~
  11. help with daughter 19

    Hi pinebunny, sorry to hear about your daughter's troubles. My son is 20 and in a similar position, in that he dropped out of college and found it very anxiety-inducing looking for work and couldn't face going back to college because of the social aspects associated with it. At the moment we are quite stuck also. A positive is that my son does help out in a charity shop regularly now. It has been good for confidence-building but is not a long-term plan and we're unsure how to move on from this now. Would your daughter consider volunteering, as it is a lot less pressure and a good way to establish a routine and get out and about mixing with people, or at least it's a start? All the best to you both. ~ Mel ~
  12. School transport issues

    If school are on board it should be sorted fairly quickly for you, hopefully. Fingers crossed. ~ Mel ~
  13. School transport issues

    Hi Kez, is it possible to speak to the driver and get him to tell the LEA that he can't cope with the behaviouir of the students? Would the driver cooperate do you think? ~ Mel ~
  14. Really needing help with son's behaviour

    Hi Abi, and welcome. Have you spoken to your doctor about changing the medication dose before giving up on it completely? It could be that the dosage just needs adjusting. I would def go back to your GP to discuss alternatives first. Other than that, the key to dealing with the behaviours you're describing is consistency. You need to come up with a plan of action that will work with your particular child, i.e. what does he really love, what could you use as an incentive for good behaviour or take away if behaviour is unacceptable. Once you have worked out what you can use, you need to be very consistent and don't give in no matter what. If you have agreed that such and such will be removed if behaviour is bad, then you have to follow through and not give in even if the behaviour gets worse. If he sees that behaving worse makes you give in, he will continue to behave badly to make you crack. Once he understands that you won't give in, his behaviour will improve, but his behaviour could, unfortunately, get worse before it gets better; ride out the storm and stick to your guns and it will start to work. I would sit down with him and draw out a chart showing what will happen if he behaves badly and what will happen if he behaves well so that he understands before you start. He is still quite young and it is very important that you get his behaviour under control before he becomes too big and possibly aggressive for you to handle so now is a good time to start. Good luck. ~ Mel ~
  15. Update on Glen: Sectioned again

    So sorry to hear about Glen's deterioration, Jeanne. I really hope the hospital can get to the bottom of the underlying causes of Glen's problems and come up with a solution to make him feel better and happier. Very worrying and stressful time for you all. Sending hugs. <'> ~ Mel ~
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