does this sound familiar???

[claire33]

Hi all

 

Ill explain a bit first why im asking.

Im always trying to find out from k wht he doesnt like about things to see if i can help him in anyway and he can never tell me.

Yet today we went shopping which usually i dont like doing with him as its usually hell, but when hw

e was in the car he started saying that his teddy spongebob which he had with him (obsession at the moment) doesnt like shopping because its to loud and that he doesnt like the people shouting and things dropping and basically every noise you would here in the supermarket, so he said is it okay if he waits in the car.

I think he was really talking about himself yet when i asked him if he didnt like the noises either he said he doesnt know, but spongebob doesnt he hates it.

Does anyone have any experiences of there children talking about themselves as another person or just as something else??????

If you do why do you think they do this???????

[stressedmumto2]

I think this is fantastic that he is saying to you in a roundabout way that he doesn't like it. It sems to be a sensory overload that your son is finding difficult to cope with and it's a similar pattern for alot of our children. My son too doesn't like the super-market. Maybe now you know what it is you could aks him if spongebob would like to wear some headphones and listen to some music when he has to walk around and see what he says to that if the idea appeals to him you could try them on spongebob and him and maybe just do a short visit to the shop and see how he copes, this seems to work with some children but not all.

 

My son is 8 and a half and at last the last few weeks he has begun to amaze me by telling me why he refuses to go out of the house, why he didn't like his schools and why he refuses to go with his dad. I think for my son that he's able to explain now becaues the pressure has been taken off him I think when he wsa in the panic of all of it he just couldn't explain.

 

I think for now you can really use good old sponge bob to your advantage to help your sons communication skills, well done <'>

[darky]

oh yes! my daughter does this all the time. its still pretty hard to make out what she is going on about. sometimes she will say things like "lucy (her dolly) does not like to sleep with the lights off" just an example, but similar.

 

its like a brief snapshot isnt it. a glimpse of what they are thinking. same as you though, i wish i could rely on it more sometimes!!

 

it might be an idea, when your in a situation your unsure of how he will cope, ask him what teddy thinks maybe.

[claire33]

Thanx stressedmumto

 

I was a bit surprised when he came out with it to be honest as he is usually just waving his hands around and talking to himself along with other stuff, and to be honest usually i have to switch off but im glad i didnt today.

Actually to be honest when he told me when i entered the shop i found myself trying to listen to all the sounds he could possibly be hearing and there must be lots but to hear them all at the same time must be distressing to say the least.

I really felt for him today while we were in there it was quite bsy today and he ran around, shouted waved his arms, made noises as usual and usually ill try and quieten him but i thought no if doing it helps him why should i denie him that. Spongebob is the man in my book.

[Flora]

Children often relate feelings through toys they are close to. Many psychologists use dolls etc to get children to talk about themselves. Not being an expert myself (obviously) I don't know why they do this. But if you look at situations where children have to be prepared for something, or when they've had some sort of trauma and someone is trying to get them to talk, dolls and teddy bears are used to relate what's going to happen or what has happened.

 

Flora

[stressedmumto2]

The behaviour you have descirbed Claire is where he is trying to block out all the noise, quite funny when you think of it that the noise our children make seem so much louder to us but for them it's actually not, hence why sometimes the louder the situation is the louder they go up, certainly the case for my son. Take Care <'>

[claire33]

Hi stressedmumto2

 

You have just described my k perfectly, i dont think the word quite is in his vocabulary

[stressedmumto2]

It may be worth you asking an occupational therapist to do a sensory questionaire and to do some tests with your child as to establish exactly what difficulties he has in the area of sensory processing. The OT can also offer some good avice to help with areas of concern and go into your child's school and give advice to them in case this becomes a difficult are for him too <'>

[cmuir]

Hi

 

My son does exactly the same. I've just assumed that he's testing the water, to see what my reaction is.

 

Caroline.

[smiley]

My son has a small money holder (for a drink at playtime etc..) in the shape of a dog, that he takes to school for exactly this reason - he will often tell a teacher/dinnerlady how he is feeling through it.

I used to use puppets or similar at home - he's a little older now, and is able to express himself better with me now.