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About darky

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    Mt Blanc
  • Birthday 12/26/1972

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  1. I found this one sooooooooooo much better than most of the programs they have done recently. I certainly cried lots, especially when they all got up to perform at the end. It wasn't just hey look at me I am Autistic and look at what I can do. I was honestly well and truely gobsmacked. It was wonderful
  2. The hair thing, I do wonder. Very static, double crown, sticks up. Gait definately, clumsy, awkward movements. Not sure about a "look" though. I take it the person meant facial features?
  3. It's difficult for me to comment really. My children attend mainstream and are statemented. There is a bigger push towards street wise "normality" for want of better words. At one point I questioned as to whether that was right and best for my children, I do not think that now, but I guess I won't know until they have grown up whether what I am doing is right. Before I make the next comment, I am going to generalise, but only speaking from my personal experiences, I fully accept there are acceptions to the rule, and everyone is different. This is NOT a slur on parenting, but simply an observation and opinion. I see programs like this, and it gives me hope and reassurance. Having higher functioning children myself and working in support groups, there are a lot of parents, including myself, who worry endlessly about the future, what there child can and cope with. It has sometimes felt like living on a knifes edge, and a great fear of things going wrong, because when they do go wrong, they really do, and not one of us would wish for it to happen again. Other parents have echoed these fears. It puts us in a vicious circle. I do now wonder who we are protecting, them- for the upsets and setbacks, or us- having to live with and cope with the upsets and setbacks. I hope you know what I mean. Sometimes, it is easy to be blinkered. Staying in a routine, making decisions, and staying in a comfort zone as not to rock the boat. It's self preservation I think. Anyhoo, I hope it doesn't sound patronising when I say, that in this program I saw parents pushing themselves out their comfort zones by changing the rules a little, and their children responded very well. I would personally find it very insulting being one of those parents, listening to someone like me worrying about what I thought mine could or could not cope with or having even a slightly negative outlook. I am sooooooooo lucky mine are verbal and high functioning, they are capable of whatever they want to do. The outlook has to be a positive one. For me to say otherwise after watching a program like this, would be, in my opinion, quite tragic.
  4. We don't know. but then again, when are a any of us prepared to be pushed out our "comfort" zones unless we try? I think the program was overall positve. Two of these children are severly Autistic, one that is pretty much no verbal and can't "read" One parent agreed to let their son practice at home, something they never thought was possible, and something he had never done before. He coped well surpising the the parents. I do think that sometimes it's the parents that give their children a comfort zone and decide what the comfort zones EW, and that is not a slur on parents, as we all fo what we can, but I was simply stating how positive this program was.
  5. My daughter has been on Citalopram for a while now for anxiety. It has been a miracle drug for her. It doesn't suit everyone though, so I would have a chat to your GP. <'>
  6. darky

    Good news!

    Wonderful news
  7. I agree. I know resources are tight, but waiting so long is a nightmare. Getting private dx could be as well, and you would be seriously out of pocket. The waiting times here for a full dx the last time I looked were a year plus, but there were a lot of appointments to get through from different professionals. Is it the same in your area? I hope I don't sound biased, but private dx can be expensive, and LA's only have to take them into consideration. Put it simply, they may say, well we have considered it and we don't agree. I'm not saying that will happen, but it is a possibility. I've seen a lot of parents frustrated, that's all I can say.
  8. darky


    I really feel for you Justine. <'> I just needed to give you one of these <'> I find things always seem much easier with a good nights sleep. I am lucky in that me and hubby just have this routine, where I go to bed early, and he goes to bed late, I wake early, he wakes later. It's ok if you can do it. I'm sorry it's not like that for you. <'>
  9. I have enjoyed it so much, I watched it twice Can't wait for the next one. I think it was very positive. I found it extremely helpful as much as anything. Watching Carly I could honestly see so much of my DD, the over dramatic strops that aren't always meant. The arms folded, stomp stomp. "I am NEVER doing this EVER again hmphh" I had tears of joy watching it all. The two singers are absolutely incredible. Both pushed out of their comfort zones, but both compromised and were very accepting in the end. I think it's amazing what can be achieved. The parents should all be proud, they were pushed over their comfort zones as well. They are all wonderful It had a much more postive feel to it than YASS. IMO.
  10. I'm watching it now. Carly has an amazing voice. Superb
  11. I think families can be difficult. My mum just wouldn't accept things, even though she took me for a brainscan when I was little because of what is now understood as ASD. My girl is very much sensory seeking, she goes way up high high high for a while, then crashes. It baffles my mother. She will ask my girl "why are you behaving like this?" when she's high, then get upset she can't reach my girl when she crashes and hides away to come down. What was funny though was a few weeks ago, out the blue, she said "We think we know where the Autism has come from" "Oh yeah?" I replied, and she said "It's come from your Dad's side of the family, their all the same you know" *Me nodding in agreement* As for my husbands side of the family, they don't ever talk about it or ask. It's hush hush, sweep under the carpet. A while ago we went to a family party, we were assured there were going to be no balloons. (My girl was terrified to panic at the time) Only, when we turned up, the hall was full of them. The shock sent my girl straight into full blown panic meltdown. I couldn't get her anywhere near that room. One of her uncles said "leave it to me" with a wink. He bent down to try and talk to her, but in meltdown panic, she wasn't going to listen. He grabbed her hand and said, "ok sweetie come with me" I saw her draw back her foot, and with one swift action I grabbed her away before she landed one on him. This was one of her favorate people, and she had never, and I wouldn't have believed she would have gone for him, but she did. It wasn't nice, but they really do "get it" now.
  12. I have had a tricky time with my daughter. She is 11 now and much more willing to try. She didn't like food with different textures like tomatos because they have a skin, and they have a squishy bit with seeds. Same with yogurts and bits. It was always difficult to get her sat down eating a varied meal, and it took a very long time to get her to. I am lucky in that she enjoys being involved, and doesn't read my intentions as trying to trick her. (I have noticed children sometimes do) So I get her helping me shop, weighing food which she loves, and helping me prepare food and answer any questions I could about where it all comes from. I shamefully used to use my son, who was also eager to help prepare food, and he was always willing to try anything, and most of the time he used to do the hard work for me in the form of a bit of sybling rivalry. She didn't like being out done by her brother, so would often grab a bit and eat it just to annoy him I think Once she had eaten that, she was often willing to have a little on her plate, she may or may not eat it all, but accepting it on her plate and trying it was half the "battle" Even now, when I am preparing for example a salad, she will willingly eat lettuce and cucumber, but reluctantly tomato. So I give her the lettuce and cucumber, and more often than not, she will eat a bit of tomato when I am preparing it, and maybe a bit on her plate. It's all ongoing though. She will eat raw onion, but doesn't like cooked. She loves raw carrot, but hates cooked baby carrots, but the way I see it, she does actually eat carrots one way or another, she eats onions one way or another. When I was young, there was a lot I really didn't like, but as an adult I love. I do my best without making too much fuss, and actually my girl eats a more varied diet than I did. It's really tricky to try different things all the time without making too much fuss about it. Jo Frost really does have some brilliant tips to get children eating well. On Embarrassing Bodies not so long ago they showed a young boy who had sensory related food issues and how they helped the family. You might get some tips from the website. One other tip, I found home made pizzas a wonderful way of trying new foods. My girl is quite creative and loves decorating her own pizzas. I chop up lots of different veg, she chooses what she wants. Colour and artwork means more than taste to her in the end. She is very proud of her creations, as long as Mum is prepared to try some!
  13. My son used to do this from nursery right up to year 2 and it was exhausting. We didn't have a diagnosis for him at the time. He always kicked off from the house, all the way to school and played up right until I left, which was difficult with him clung to my legs. I figured out he didn't like the unsettled part of going into the class and always settled when someone came to calm him down, but that became a vicious circle and routine of him screaming, then soothed by a teacher or TA. I personally think, looking back in hindsight, he was kicking off for a predictable reaction and it just became routine. Once he settled in a different routine, which was a very harsh teacher that used to call out "Morning Callum" whilst burried deep in a store cupboard, recognising his screams from the carpark, and clear instructions on what he had to do once in the class, he settled down. Not saying it will be the same for your son though. Good luck, I do sympathise. <'>
  14. We didn't have any experience of CAMHS until the diagnosis. Down here we have a multi disaplinary team, with consultant Paed that makes the dx. We then got refered to CAMHS for advice, but in all honesty it was rubbish! It varies so much!
  15. How horrible. I hope you feel a bit better now. <'> I agree, MP3 player has been a godsend here or something to fiddle with, even my phone or anything else I might have on me, because it's a special treat and spontanious, my girl gets distracted by what she is playing with or listening to, it helps to divert her focus away from things that might make things tricky so she doesn't focus on it. She also likes quizzes and challenges, so for example, on the bus I might say, how many red cars can you see? She loves playing eye spy as well even though it's always random with her I also find the game "it" works wonders
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