martyn Report post Posted August 6, 2008 Hello every one. I don't think any one will be able to remember me from my last message. Which was nearly two years ago. The content of the message briefly was. I mentioned I'd had anough of the treatment i'd received from my local primary care trust for my 14 year old daughter regarding life skills and inter personal skills. I said I was going to fight the good fight and start legal action against them. Well the legal as now been up and running for all most the same length of time. The good news is i've won that part of my legal action against them with out going to court. My Primary Care Trust are now making home vists on a regular basis to get a accurate picture of my daughters needs.Hopefully strategies will start soon. The biggest decision I have to make now, is do we go through with this help. The reason being my daughter is now 17. She has no clue about what may happen in the forth coming months regarding this help. We have kept everything from her. Putting that to one side , she has made stroung rumblings that she doesn't want help in any shape or form in her personal life. She has hardly any structure in doing chores around the house for example. We try to develope these skills on a slowly slowly basis but over the last 10 months. She doesn't want to listen to reason. God I just don't know what to do for the best.Please give me your views. Perhaps you've beeen in a similar situation.Sorry I failed to mention she as mild to moderate Aspergers Thanks Martyn Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted August 6, 2008 Hi, I have an NT 19yr old so know what teenagers are like, god do I know! but my 12 year old, ADHD/ASD is finaly about to get some support, after months of asking/beggiing etc etc. I too have not told him what has been happening in the background, and now he is horrified that I am going to send him out with strangers, as he puts it!!! he dosnt even want them to come into the house, which puts me in an awkward position, as that is the help I have pleaded for, so similar in some ways, now we are about to get help, the kids say no, and with all the rights they have these days they will probably be allowed too! Good luck. Enid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted August 6, 2008 Similar situation - I fought the LA for my daughter's college transport and involved a solicitor successfully, only to find that she didn't want to use it after all - aargh! But it had to be her decision in the end. She is now 19 and also has strong views about accepting support, so I sympathise. As your daughter is now 17 you will probably have to start involving her in any decisions about her future, and thinking of a way to sell the forthcoming package of help to her. You will probably find that when she is 18 professionals will not want to talk to you on her behalf at all but will treat her as an adult with regard to making decisions. It's tough, especially if in rejecting help, it places a burden on you as a parent to provide it. What I have found, especially when dealing with the college my daughter attends, that I am usually marginalised as a parent and nobody communicates with me or listens to my views. But I am still the backstop when anything goes wrong - suddenly I become the parent with full responsibility again. K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
