Sounds & Music Affecting My Life! Help!!

[blueoryion]

Hello all, I'm 24 and was diagnosed with Aspergers a few months ago. I've always been particularly sensitive to sounds and some music; when I was smaller I would cover my ears and scream as a reaction. Now I'm older, I realise this is incredibly anti-social and have stopped doing it. However, whenever I hear certain sounds and music I get very anxious and often upset. People around me brush it off, saying I'm being childish and should just 'block' the sounds out, but it is not as simple as that. I can't explain why it makes me feel so uncomfortable and anxious, I honestly don't know. All I know is I have to get away from it as quickly as possible.

More specifically, the issue here is that where I work, my boss keeps playing the same CD over and over again. Unfortunately, the CD he's fallen so much in love with is one that is seriously affecting me. For some reason I'm over-sensitive to it. I can't wear earplugs because I have to speak to people and I've tried explaining how I feel and all he says is, 'It's for the customers, we have to give them what they want.' He doesn't care that this is making me so upset.

On one hand I feel really stupid, because I know 'normal' people aren't affected in the same way I am by these things, but on the other hand I feel that my boss should respect my feelings.

Here's the twist - my boss is also my father.

Am I the only one who's affected so much by music and sounds? Does anyone have an idea as to how I can combat this? I've tried breathing exercises to help with the anxiety but they never work. Please help!

Amy x

[Mumble]

Here's the twist - my boss is also my father.

Nice twist...

 

I'm affected in a very similar way to that which you describe. I have a major difficulty on the bus/train sometimes in the street when people play music out loud, not just because of the volume but of what they play. There are a number of genres of music I simply cannot listen to as they 'hurt' but that's difficult to explain. Someone sent me a you tube clip and asked me to listen to the words - but it was set to a dance track that I simply couldn't cope with - very difficult to explain, and I can't as you say, block it out.

 

What helps? Well for me, something that might sound strange - having a psych who, after attempting things like breathing exercises, blocking out, concentrating on other things etc. finally gave up (in a good way) and accepted that things were different for me - and so the focus became work with, rather than fix. I've also learnt to say to myself that what's annoying to me is someone else's normal (and I'm sure I have 'normals' that are annoying to others).

 

You don't say where you work (fair enough) but some things that might work - MP3 player with music you can cope with, ear plugs at some times (you can still hear through them so would know when to take them out), ear muffs/woolly hat over ears if outside, suggesting other music to be played that you would like and so would customers.

 

And if that doesn't work, I think a well timed 'accidental' stamp on the CD should work...

 

[bikemad]

No advice but know my lad is like it...certain music he loves kinda clubland beat but then other stuff drives him mad bigtime.

[Kazzen161]

I don't have any issues with over sensitivity to noise (as far as I know), but I was in a shop the other day and the music was so loud I could not think straight. I asked if they could turn it down and they said no. I avoid going in that shop if at all possible. There is a card shop that that has the same effect too.

 

You would hope that your father would be a bit more understanding, perhaps playing his preferred CD when you are on lunch break.

 

I don't know if this is covered by disability discrimination at work - you could get advice from the CAB or NAS.

 

I am sure the customers must get fed up with hearing the same CD every time they come in.