Mumble Report post Posted January 22, 2009 There was a joke in the paper today, took me ages to 'get' it but now I can't stop laughing (what's that item on the AQ - "I'm always last to see the point of a joke... ). I thought I'd share it with you to brighten up the night - yes it's 1am and no I can't sleep. Maybe people can add their own awful ones (there must be some left from the Christmas crackers) (and yes, BD, they do need to be clean ) Q: How do you know when your cat's eaten a duckling? A: He looks a bit down in the mouth. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheNeil Report post Posted January 22, 2009 What do you call a man with a wooden head? Ed Wood What do you call a man with two wooden heads? Edward Wood What do you call a man with three wooden heads? Edward Woodward What do you call a judge with no thumbs? Justice Fingers What's an archeologist? Someone whose career's in ruins What happens when two snails fight? They slug it out I also know one about a lapdancing club...but maybe not on a family forum Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
something_different Report post Posted January 22, 2009 Scottish Jokes two cows in a feild, what one is in holiday? the one wi the wee calf (week aff) man goes in to buy a set of antlers. how much are they? �150 thats affa deer! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheNeil Report post Posted January 24, 2009 Poundstretcher have bought Marks and Spencer. The new stores will be called Stretchmarks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KarenT Report post Posted January 25, 2009 Poundstretcher have bought Marks and Spencer. The new stores will be called Stretchmarks Thanks Neil, the Thirlaway menfolk have been hooting at that one all day Karen x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
something_different Report post Posted February 10, 2009 (edited) Wee wummin goes intae a butchershop, where the butcher has just come out of the freezer, and is standing hands behind his back, with his rear end aimed at an electric fire. The wee wumman checks out the display case then asks, "Is that yer Ayrshire bacon?" "Naw," replies the butcher. "It's jist ma haun's Ah'm heatin'." Edited February 10, 2009 by something_different Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
