Unusual behaviour?

[Clare S.]

I'm new to this forum and also to Asperger Syndrome - my 8 year old son was diagnosed about 3 months ago. I have a ton of questions but will stick to one for the moment. My son, who is in most ways a very gentle and sensitive child, spends a fairly significant part of his day making very loud explosion noises and also pretending to shoot people with imaginary guns, cannons etc. This is okay in the privacy of his bedroom (although it can sound as if WWII is going on in there) but he also makes a pretend gun out of his fingers and shoots at us, or other people, if something happens that he does not like or if he gets annoyed. He seems obsessed with the idea of guns and shooting people / blowing things up although we have never encouraged this. I think the exploding noises are probably a kind of tension release but am concerned about the gun obsession as other people may get the wrong idea about him. Does anyone else have experience with this kind of thing?

[Sally44]

My son does this alot of the time. What he is doing is re-playing a DVD or film he has seen on TV. He repeats the words and the movements. If I ask him 'where is that from' he can identify the film. This used to be the only way he knew how to play. However with alot of input from a speech therapist he has learnt alot of play skills and now plays very well with other children.

 

Does your son also repeat words/phrases from TV or films or what other people have said? If he does this either immediately, or he uses those phrases and puts them into his spontaneous speech. Then he is using delayed echolalia. That is repeating something he has already heard. That demonstrates a speech disorder or a different way of acquiring speech. And if that is the case I would suggest you look at all the reports, especially from the Speech and Language Therapist, as they don't always pick up on this.

 

For a diagnosis of Aspergers your child should have typical acquirement of language at least up to the age of 3.

 

If he has any speech difficulties or social interaction/play skill difficulties then a SALT should be putting together a programme to address this.

 

Also google Semantic Pragmatic Speech Disorder and see if that sounds relevant. If you think it is then you should write to the SALT and ask them their opinion on this. Children with a diagnosis of Aspergers tend to not get much, if any, input from a Speech Therapist because their 'language' is considered age appropriate or even advanced. However if he has something like SPSD then that is a disorder and it is for life and the SALT should be involved and cannot discharge your son from SALT. The SALT should also assess their social interaction/play skills and put together a programme to develop those skills and school should be given advice as to how to meet those difficulties in school because he will find breaktimes and dinner time difficult if he cannot interact and play with the other children.

 

As to whether it is a specific obsession, I'm not sure. I would say talk to him about 'where he has seen it'. This is also an area where his social awareness if obviously going to be poor. You can see that if someone upsets him and he points his finger at them and pretends to shoot them that it is going to be a little disconcerting. He won't get that. You may need to talk to him about 'outcomes' ie. what happens if something is shot with a gun. And you might want to use something like Social Stories. If he is at an age that he just doesn't get what you are telling him, then you may need to just tell him that "its okay to play pretend gun fighting when you are playing, but you cannot pretend to shoot someone if they have upset you or made you angry."

 

Infact this might be a good opportunity to consider his emotional regulation. How does he communicate or show his feelings and emotions. Can he recognise emotions in others. This is an area that the Educational Psychologist gives advice to school about. He may need to be taught more appropriate ways of showing how he is feeling or how to deal with situations he doesn't like.

[Mandapanda]

Hi Clare

 

Welcome to the forum!

 

Boys tend to like guns anyway. They will use a stick, or build one out of Duplo, this is normal!! It is just that your son may be doing this at wholly inappropriate times, due to his not understanding social interaction. Social stories are supposed to help but I have never understood them .

 

My eldest had various 'habits', making noises, putting his hand down his trousers. One habit would disappear and a new one would replace it. CAMHS said that if we tried to stop it he may start doing something even less desirable! Making a big thing of it seemed to make it worse, as we were causing him stress which would make him do it more.

 

My youngest is an anxious, sensitive child, who tries really hard to be evil and is obsessed with swords and shields etc. With him it is just that he doesn't want to be 'wimpish' and is trying to do the opposite.

 

Having AS does not mean they will not learn to consciously understand certain principles of social behaviour as they get older, so I would expect this behaviour to fizzle out.

 

 

 

 

[Clare S.]

Thank you for replying - it's nice to hear from other people with similar issues. I know what you mean about social stories, I haven't quite got my head round them yet either! I think that working on what is correct social behavior is a very good idea as at the moment we tend to get irritated with his behavior rather than calmly pointing out why it is inappropriate and where it is okay for him to do it. Thanks again

 

Hi Clare

 

Welcome to the forum!

 

Boys tend to like guns anyway. They will use a stick, or build one out of Duplo, this is normal!! It is just that your son may be doing this at wholly inappropriate times, due to his not understanding social interaction. Social stories are supposed to help but I have never understood them .

 

My eldest had various 'habits', making noises, putting his hand down his trousers. One habit would disappear and a new one would replace it. CAMHS said that if we tried to stop it he may start doing something even less desirable! Making a big thing of it seemed to make it worse, as we were causing him stress which would make him do it more.

 

My youngest is an anxious, sensitive child, who tries really hard to be evil and is obsessed with swords and shields etc. With him it is just that he doesn't want to be 'wimpish' and is trying to do the opposite.

 

Having AS does not mean they will not learn to consciously understand certain principles of social behaviour as they get older, so I would expect this behaviour to fizzle out.

 

[bikemad]

My son does this all the time...shoots at people in the street if they do something he dont like eeeeeekkkkk... he is army mad n camo mad n want to join cadets n army etc...but he is super sensitive n cries all the time n gets bullied like mad.

 

edited cos cant spell.

Edited July 13, 2009 by bikemad

[Clare S.]

I know I shouldn't but I get really embarrassed by some of my son's more odd behavior, like when he pretends to shoot at kids he doesn't know riding past the house on their bikes. I feel I want to rush out and launch into a big explanation as to why he is doing this, he's not really mean etc. I wonder if the gun and shooting obsession is to do with them being sensitive and feeling they need something extra to defend themselves with? I know my son thinks he is weak (he's actually said so) which makes me really sad. I'm really sorry your son gets bullied, we had to move ours to a different school for the same reason.

 

My son does this all the time...shoots at people in the street if they do something he dont like eeeeeekkkkk... he is army mad n camo mad n want to join cadets n army etc...but he is super sensitive n cries all the time n gets bullied like mad.

 

edited cos cant spell.

 

[bid]

My NT 8 year old spends his time rolling around on the floor, shooting lego guns, playing with minature soldiers and making machine gun noises, etc...and he is actually a very quiet, dear little boy Oh, and he drove us up the wall at Christmas shooting foam thingys at us from his new Star Wars storm trooper gun thing

 

To be honest, I think it's pretty standard 'boy' behaviour!

 

I wouldn't worry too much...I think sometimes we can over-analyse every little thing our kids do, especially when the dx is very recent <'>

 

Bid

Edited July 13, 2009 by bid

[bikemad]

I know I shouldn't but I get really embarrassed by some of my son's more odd behavior, like when he pretends to shoot at kids he doesn't know riding past the house on their bikes. I feel I want to rush out and launch into a big explanation as to why he is doing this, he's not really mean etc. I wonder if the gun and shooting obsession is to do with them being sensitive and feeling they need something extra to defend themselves with? I know my son thinks he is weak (he's actually said so) which makes me really sad. I'm really sorry your son gets bullied, we had to move ours to a different school for the same reason.

 

Yea my lad thinks he is weak, stupid, a nothing. odd etc etc.........last thing he is is mean lol he is scared of his own shadow which is why its funny he is so army mad.....we had to change his school cos the bullying got so bad he was suicidal at age 9.

[Sally44]

He's not necessarily being mean. He's just playing as he knows how. And as I mentioned before he might be re-enacting something he has seen on TV or DVD. My son knows many fighting scenes eg. from Star Wars, I Robot etc and he re-enacts them. Those on the spectrum can sometimes find it harder to play spontaneously or have imagination or flexibility to play as other children do. For them they play by re-enacting something they have already seen. That doesn't mean that they won't develop an imagination. My own son has progressed from only re-enacting things exactly as they happened ie. the exact words and movements. Then he began to use things he had seen eg. Star Wars and mix it with something else he had seen eg. I Robot. Then he began to make up his own stories and dialogue using those same characters etc. You could always join in with your son and play these war games with him. You will quickly get an idea of how he is playing ie. he may try to control and direct you and tell you what to say and do. Or he maybe more flexible and may let you introduce new storylines or ideas into the play. I wouldn't try to stop him, because that is where he is at. I would join in with him. It doesn't have to be a long session. Sometimes I just join in with my son for 5-10 mins.

And I think you will feel less embarrassed the more you understand what he is doing and why. You can't explain his whole developmental history to every stranger you meet.

It is really good that he is playing as there are many children that cannot do what your child is doing. So I would try to build on it and improve his skills through the things he likes to do. He is far more likely to pay attention and actually understand and learn if you use a subject he is interested in.