Hi am concerned about my 3yr old dd

[shaz71]

Hi i have been on the forum before with concerns for my older daughter who will be 8 in August, she is on the sen register school action plus with iep with 5 targets on, i looked into adhd as she fidgets a lot but then someone mentioned aspergers and i read it and had her looked at by a psychologist at cahms who said me and partner had split up and that was why, but this happened 2yrs ago and when assessed it was a year and half ago, school said she was fine nothing to worry about, although she was pinching things that she liked ie toys shiney objects, at the time she was tapping and repeating me 4 times after sentences said, she is very anxious as well as tummy aches and headaches, she was delayed with speech was 2 and half before coming out with a couple of words together and just over 3 before she could speak but had some unclear speech, well since then she had a speech therapist involved about the same time and they said she was 2yrs behind on speech and language, i then spoke to ass senco about her school work who said nothing to worry about and they are only putting her on the sen register as i am worried, since then she has been diagnosed as having silent reflux. It as really annoyed me that i have felt fobbed off.

 

But sorry for that just wanted to fill the gap about my older daughter and the reason why i want my younger daughter tested, well she is a totally different story. She had proper reflux and didn't sleep much as a baby due to the severe pain she was in, again i was fobbed off by professionals as she couldn't possibley have reflux as she is a big baby and happy. Anyway eventually a gp listened to me and referred her to peadiatrician who diagnosed her with milk intolerance/allergy and sent her for a barium meal just in case she had reflux but he didn't think so as she was big, and lo and behold she had it all along which she is now medicated for, but then she had the controversial mmr and the other injection at 15mths up until then she could speak 10words and was trying to count on her fingers, then she started stopping breathing due to the reflux it went pete tong and had a couple of seizures due to this and ended up in hospital, she then lost all speech and her tantrums went mega severe where she thought nothing of head butting walls doors or whatever even if it meant giving herself an almighty bruise, she would just hit out at kids and hurt them at playgroups i persevered although many a time i just wanted to give upand go home and she is more sociable now, but it is other things like flapping of hands when excited screaming high pitched scream that goes through everyone, putting hands over ears a lot and shouting too loud, she shouts a lot doesn't speak quietly her speech very unclear, tiptoes on certain floorings but looks funny as she is a very big girl the size of a 4-5 yr old she is now 3yrs and 3mths, she is impulsive and is extremely head strong. Her tantrums although have calmed down she still as over 4 a day although some aren't as bad as others but on major ones she will think nothing of throwing chairs pushchairs pulling her own hair out in clumps and not batting an eye lid, biting herself. She can also be a bit on the ocd side likes everything in its place and wants things to be a certain way and carries on if we walk on the wrong side of the road etc. She is also ambidextrous she still swaps pens from one hand to the other although i have noticed she is favouring the left side moreso. The one thing i have noticed from a young age she mirror imaged people so much so that they even noticed she made a point of it and i mean literally did everything that person did, saw a woman smoking a cigarette with leg crossed so she did the same hand movements etc as if she had a cig in her hand. She now copies her sister and acts like animals, Zoes best animal is the horse and she literally becomes one out and about in public and gallops and holds her hands funny and neighs really loudly in the supermarket which only just started taking her back in as couldn't control her she just doesn't listen at all and is very hyper when out she pulls the trolley from the front end as if is a cart and she is the horse drawing it and neighing loudly which makes people laugh, then next minuite she is sat on top of the sugar licking all the sugar up lol, she also does what her older older sister used to do a lot lick everything and people, her older sister is now 15yrs old The nearly 8yr old did it but not for a long time. Sorry for rambling but sometimes i think i am making a mountain out of a mole hill as people keep saying to me that is just her personality but then others i think with 2 depressed teenagers that have been known to self harm i keep thinking yes i am doing the right thing, i do think something is going on but am not sure as a lot of the diagnosis for other things they fit into so not sure, i just want them to do well and not struggle and be depressed like their older brother and sister, the sister 15yr old is extremely artistic and is obsessed with anima and manga, draws it and talks about it most the time even wants to do crossplay and be one of the characters.......Sharon x

[shaz71]

Hi i have been on the forum before with concerns for my older daughter who will be 8 in August, she is on the sen register school action plus with iep with 5 targets on, i looked into adhd as she fidgets a lot but then someone mentioned aspergers and i read it and had her looked at by a psychologist at cahms who said me and partner had split up and that was why, but this happened 2yrs ago and when assessed it was a year and half ago, school said she was fine nothing to worry about, although she was pinching things that she liked ie toys shiney objects, at the time she was tapping and repeating me 4 times after sentences said, she is very anxious as well as tummy aches and headaches, she was delayed with speech was 2 and half before coming out with a couple of words together and just over 3 before she could speak but had some unclear speech, well since then she had a speech therapist involved about the same time and they said she was 2yrs behind on speech and language, i then spoke to ass senco about her school work who said nothing to worry about and they are only putting her on the sen register as i am worried, since then she has been diagnosed as having silent reflux. It as really annoyed me that i have felt fobbed off.

 

But sorry for that just wanted to fill the gap about my older daughter and the reason why i want my younger daughter tested, well she is a totally different story. She had proper reflux and didn't sleep much as a baby due to the severe pain she was in, again i was fobbed off by professionals as she couldn't possibley have reflux as she is a big baby and happy. Anyway eventually a gp listened to me and referred her to peadiatrician who diagnosed her with milk intolerance/allergy and sent her for a barium meal just in case she had reflux but he didn't think so as she was big, and lo and behold she had it all along which she is now medicated for, but then she had the controversial mmr and the other injection at 15mths up until then she could speak 10words and was trying to count on her fingers, then she started stopping breathing due to the reflux it went pete tong and had a couple of seizures due to this and ended up in hospital, she then lost all speech and her tantrums went mega severe where she thought nothing of head butting walls doors or whatever even if it meant giving herself an almighty bruise, she would just hit out at kids and hurt them at playgroups i persevered although many a time i just wanted to give upand go home and she is more sociable now, but it is other things like flapping of hands when excited screaming high pitched scream that goes through everyone, putting hands over ears a lot and shouting too loud, she shouts a lot doesn't speak quietly her speech very unclear, tiptoes on certain floorings but looks funny as she is a very big girl the size of a 4-5 yr old she is now 3yrs and 3mths, she is impulsive and is extremely head strong. Her tantrums although have calmed down she still as over 4 a day although some aren't as bad as others but on major ones she will think nothing of throwing chairs pushchairs pulling her own hair out in clumps and not batting an eye lid, biting herself. She can also be a bit on the ocd side likes everything in its place and wants things to be a certain way and carries on if we walk on the wrong side of the road etc. She is also ambidextrous she still swaps pens from one hand to the other although i have noticed she is favouring the left side moreso. The one thing i have noticed from a young age she mirror imaged people so much so that they even noticed she made a point of it and i mean literally did everything that person did, saw a woman smoking a cigarette with leg crossed so she did the same hand movements etc as if she had a cig in her hand. She now copies her sister and acts like animals, Zoes best animal is the horse and she literally becomes one out and about in public and gallops and holds her hands funny and neighs really loudly in the supermarket which only just started taking her back in as couldn't control her she just doesn't listen at all and is very hyper when out she pulls the trolley from the front end as if is a cart and she is the horse drawing it and neighing loudly which makes people laugh, then next minuite she is sat on top of the sugar licking all the sugar up lol, she also does what her older older sister used to do a lot lick everything and people, her older sister is now 15yrs old The nearly 8yr old did it but not for a long time. Sorry for rambling but sometimes i think i am making a mountain out of a mole hill as people keep saying to me that is just her personality but then others i think with 2 depressed teenagers that have been known to self harm i keep thinking yes i am doing the right thing, i do think something is going on but am not sure as a lot of the diagnosis for other things they fit into so not sure, i just want them to do well and not struggle and be depressed like their older brother and sister, the sister 15yr old is extremely artistic and is obsessed with anima and manga, draws it and talks about it most the time even wants to do crossplay and be one of the characters.......Sharon x

 

[shaz71]

Hi i have been on the forum before with concerns for my older daughter who will be 8 in August, she is on the sen register school action plus with iep with 5 targets on, i looked into adhd as she fidgets a lot but then someone mentioned aspergers and i read it and had her looked at by a psychologist at cahms who said me and partner had split up and that was why, but this happened 2yrs ago and when assessed it was a year and half ago, school said she was fine nothing to worry about, although she was pinching things that she liked ie toys shiney objects, at the time she was tapping and repeating me 4 times after sentences said, she is very anxious as well as tummy aches and headaches, she was delayed with speech was 2 and half before coming out with a couple of words together and just over 3 before she could speak but had some unclear speech, well since then she had a speech therapist involved about the same time and they said she was 2yrs behind on speech and language, i then spoke to ass senco about her school work who said nothing to worry about and they are only putting her on the sen register as i am worried, since then she has been diagnosed as having silent reflux. It as really annoyed me that i have felt fobbed off.

 

But sorry for that just wanted to fill the gap about my older daughter and the reason why i want my younger daughter tested, well she is a totally different story. She had proper reflux and didn't sleep much as a baby due to the severe pain she was in, again i was fobbed off by professionals as she couldn't possibley have reflux as she is a big baby and happy. Anyway eventually a gp listened to me and referred her to peadiatrician who diagnosed her with milk intolerance/allergy and sent her for a barium meal just in case she had reflux but he didn't think so as she was big, and lo and behold she had it all along which she is now medicated for, but then she had the controversial mmr and the other injection at 15mths up until then she could speak 10words and was trying to count on her fingers, then she started stopping breathing due to the reflux it went pete tong and had a couple of seizures due to this and ended up in hospital, she then lost all speech and her tantrums went mega severe where she thought nothing of head butting walls doors or whatever even if it meant giving herself an almighty bruise, she would just hit out at kids and hurt them at playgroups i persevered although many a time i just wanted to give upand go home and she is more sociable now, but it is other things like flapping of hands when excited screaming high pitched scream that goes through everyone, putting hands over ears a lot and shouting too loud, she shouts a lot doesn't speak quietly her speech very unclear, tiptoes on certain floorings but looks funny as she is a very big girl the size of a 4-5 yr old she is now 3yrs and 3mths, she is impulsive and is extremely head strong. Her tantrums although have calmed down she still as over 4 a day although some aren't as bad as others but on major ones she will think nothing of throwing chairs pushchairs pulling her own hair out in clumps and not batting an eye lid, biting herself. She can also be a bit on the ocd side likes everything in its place and wants things to be a certain way and carries on if we walk on the wrong side of the road etc. She is also ambidextrous she still swaps pens from one hand to the other although i have noticed she is favouring the left side moreso. The one thing i have noticed from a young age she mirror imaged people so much so that they even noticed she made a point of it and i mean literally did everything that person did, saw a woman smoking a cigarette with leg crossed so she did the same hand movements etc as if she had a cig in her hand. She now copies her sister and acts like animals, Zoes best animal is the horse and she literally becomes one out and about in public and gallops and holds her hands funny and neighs really loudly in the supermarket which only just started taking her back in as couldn't control her she just doesn't listen at all and is very hyper when out she pulls the trolley from the front end as if is a cart and she is the horse drawing it and neighing loudly which makes people laugh, then next minuite she is sat on top of the sugar licking all the sugar up lol, she also does what her older older sister used to do a lot lick everything and people, her older sister is now 15yrs old The nearly 8yr old did it but not for a long time. Sorry for rambling but sometimes i think i am making a mountain out of a mole hill as people keep saying to me that is just her personality but then others i think with 2 depressed teenagers that have been known to self harm i keep thinking yes i am doing the right thing, i do think something is going on but am not sure as a lot of the diagnosis for other things they fit into so not sure, i just want them to do well and not struggle and be depressed like their older brother and sister, the sister 15yr old is extremely artistic and is obsessed with anima and manga, draws it and talks about it most the time even wants to do crossplay and be one of the characters.......Sharon x

 

 

Sorry also meant to ask is it common to see a lot of the same similarities in siblings, the one thing all of them have done is miss the crawling milestone out totally and be late talkers but lisa the oldest daughter would babble but then came out in strings of sentences before her second birthday whereas rhys and mel didn't speak until they were two and zoe spoke but then lost speech? x

[justine1]

HI

I can see there are some similarities to your 3yr old and my boys,Sam(age 6 with Aspergers) and Dan (undergoing assessment) however some things, like copying other peoples behaviour(woman smoking),is IMO normal behaviour for a 3 yr old.

 

All children are very different so are all those on the spectrum.When I got Sam's diagnosis in Dec 2009 I did look at my eldest and think maybe he also has something, like your older daughter,my 9yr old Josh is very artistic and is on the gifted and talented register,he gets angry easily and is very emotional.But I have come to realise its all down to his personality and many of his problems can be managed easily as he does listen well,he likes lots of quality time and thats worked very well when he gets upset.

 

Before I even got Sam's diagnosis though,I already knew Dan was not 100%,but I wanted to get Sams diagnosis first as he had just turned six and was having massive problems at school.I also thought maybe Dans problems are just age related and again my husband and I separated 2 yrs ago so thought its that too.

 

When Dan turned four and started nursery in a reception/nursery combined class I could see a huge difference,with speech and general behaviour.My nephew is exacTLY one year younger than Dan and can speak much better and much more engaged in the world around him,my neighbours son is two mths older than Dan and again its the same thing.I also asked my mum and brother who both work with kids to give their opinion,my mum had mentioned something before but she again thought maybe its just age,but then she said he seems to have even more problems than Sam.My brother agreed and recently we went to have a picnic where Dan spent nearly 1hr kneeling with his head "buried" in the ground,not talking to anyone and not eating anything,then my brother was even more convinced.

 

Sorry gone off track!!My point is that even though Sam is ASD and Dan maybe they show very different signs,the obvious signs are the same but Dan has some problems like sleeping that Sam does not.I also have my eldest(9) and youngest (almost 2) and I know neither are autistic but they have similar personality's. All four of my boys are excellent at drawing and all like school(even though Sam has had a rocky time) Only my youngest crawled,the other three never did,Dan and Josh not at all,Sam bum shuffled before walking.I dont see there is any reason why any of those things would mean they have autism.

 

I think even though you had a bad experience with your other daughter,maybe it will be worthwhile taking your youngest to the GP anyway.I think if she isnt at preschool yet maybe you can wait until then that way you can get their opinion as well.

[shaz71]

HI

I can see there are some similarities to your 3yr old and my boys,Sam(age 6 with Aspergers) and Dan (undergoing assessment) however some things, like copying other peoples behaviour(woman smoking),is IMO normal behaviour for a 3 yr old.

 

All children are very different so are all those on the spectrum.When I got Sam's diagnosis in Dec 2009 I did look at my eldest and think maybe he also has something, like your older daughter,my 9yr old Josh is very artistic and is on the gifted and talented register,he gets angry easily and is very emotional.But I have come to realise its all down to his personality and many of his problems can be managed easily as he does listen well,he likes lots of quality time and thats worked very well when he gets upset.

 

Before I even got Sam's diagnosis though,I already knew Dan was not 100%,but I wanted to get Sams diagnosis first as he had just turned six and was having massive problems at school.I also thought maybe Dans problems are just age related and again my husband and I separated 2 yrs ago so thought its that too.

 

When Dan turned four and started nursery in a reception/nursery combined class I could see a huge difference,with speech and general behaviour.My nephew is exacTLY one year younger than Dan and can speak much better and much more engaged in the world around him,my neighbours son is two mths older than Dan and again its the same thing.I also asked my mum and brother who both work with kids to give their opinion,my mum had mentioned something before but she again thought maybe its just age,but then she said he seems to have even more problems than Sam.My brother agreed and recently we went to have a picnic where Dan spent nearly 1hr kneeling with his head "buried" in the ground,not talking to anyone and not eating anything,then my brother was even more convinced.

 

Sorry gone off track!!My point is that even though Sam is ASD and Dan maybe they show very different signs,the obvious signs are the same but Dan has some problems like sleeping that Sam does not.I also have my eldest(9) and youngest (almost 2) and I know neither are autistic but they have similar personality's. All four of my boys are excellent at drawing and all like school(even though Sam has had a rocky time) Only my youngest crawled,the other three never did,Dan and Josh not at all,Sam bum shuffled before walking.I dont see there is any reason why any of those things would mean they have autism.

 

I think even though you had a bad experience with your other daughter,maybe it will be worthwhile taking your youngest to the GP anyway.I think if she isnt at preschool yet maybe you can wait until then that way you can get their opinion as well.

 

 

Hi thanks for that justine, the reason why i mentioned the non crawling as this is a early indicator of a learning difficulty like dyslexia my 8yr old i first looked at adhd as she is continuously on the go even in bed she is constantly restless thrashing about, she as even been known to run in her sleep and sleep walk and dyslexia can have a comorbidity she may just have dyslexia but some other things are making me wonder wether something else is going on, ie she repeats things after me but whispers them so it is like she knows it isn't right to do it but can't help herself her older brother as heard her say things also he is 19yr old after the tv. She becomes animals and is highly energetic, she is the opposite to zoe though she is tiny in comparison to her friends has a six pack she is like a little monkey loves wildlife in particular birds, loves aeroplanes can tell which one is flying over, she was extremely interested in dinosaurs when younger never played with dolls she still likes dinosaurs but is now going into animals, she has an autistic friend a boy she plays with as they have the same interests, they are both in the same group as well as another lad who i suspect to have adhd as he loves attention whereas melissa doesn't as she is highly anxious hence why she has tummy aches and headaches a lot. I definately think they all are dyslexic, spelling organization memory poor fine motor skills not too good, but with melissa her speech and language was behind so i want zoe to be looked at as melissa is about 2yr behind in education and i don't want the same to happen to her. My 19yr old son god if i knew then what i know now i would have taken action he wasn't social in the slightest a couple of teachers pointed this out but i was naive and said obviously he likes his own company and funnily enough again he hung around with autistic lad and a few others when older that got diagnosed with some other disorders, Rhys is now quite social but does have some serious anger problems which i think are down to frustration as he as always been slow at everything even down to eating, he tired very easily could have 14hrs sleep and still need more, he was quite a depressive child. They have similarities but then a lot of differences, like lisa my dd doesn't like labels and loves the same clothes, because they are comfortable, she hangs around with what the chavs call geeks but again she as started getting quite depressive will sit hours drawing her friends will call for her but she won't go out not often prefers staying in listening to music and drawing, when younger she was a dog literally she even wanted a lead, would lick people and sniff at bottoms and that was at 7-8yrs it was embarrasing, she collected sticks and shiney stones would get upset if i chucked them out as under her pillow in her pockets she didn't have many friends as she was very nasty to them never got invited to birthdays bless her. Melissa though does seem to have more friends but she misunderstands language for a chat she will look up to the sky or ivade their space and you can see everyone stepping back to make space and her following them, also she interuppts a lot so much so it annoys people she doesn't understand waiting, sharing, time she is very immature, she is impulsive. Zoe i have told you about i know it is normal to copy but zoe just takes it to the extreme i have never seen a child like her, so she is original there lol, i definately think she is going to be an actress she loves attention the one connection i have noticed as well with the girls is when out and about and someone says hello they won't say hello back my eldest and zoe won't even look at them maybe glance out of corner of eye but totally blank them, melissa will look but quickly but will shake her head and walk away, but Lisa at the age of 8 couldn't grasp what one of her teachers were doing in sainsburys and wouldn't say hello again or acknowledge her and then asked me why her teacher was in sainsburys she should be at school lol. I know a lot is normal but some of it isn't and rather than wait until depressed teenagers with no self confidence and self hatred i want to help them now. The two younger ones are very hyper, whereas lisa and rhys the teenagers even when younger tired easily especially rhys. Sorry for rambling Sharon x