Sent home until after Christmas

[Sally44]

We've had a really rough couple of weeks.

This week my son was sick in school and sent home for 2 days.

I'm glad I took him to the GP because he said he was not ill and said I should keep him home for two days and then send him back in.

He wasn't sick again, and was perfectly fine as soon as out of school.

I kept him home for two days as the GP said and he was fine.

He went in on the next day and was okay in school and said he had a good day.

This morning was the school play. He arrived in school and was sick again.

I phoned another doctor who knows his history of vomitting due to anxiety or excitment. She has written a note that says he should stay at home until after the holidays.

It isn't ideal. But it is a relief because. I can't get anything done because I have to stay in incase school phones. Then I have to go to the GPs if he has been ill. And all these upsets are affecting him and we really need some calm.

This note will cover me so no-one can say I am deliberately keeping him off school.

We need to meet with school next year and talk about what we can do.

When I went to get him, he said he still wanted to do the play because he wanted to "impress" me. Bless.

But I admit, we've all had enough and need the break.

[Saneasever]

We've had a really rough couple of weeks.

This week my son was sick in school and sent home for 2 days.

I'm glad I took him to the GP because he said he was not ill and said I should keep him home for two days and then send him back in.

He wasn't sick again, and was perfectly fine as soon as out of school.

I kept him home for two days as the GP said and he was fine.

He went in on the next day and was okay in school and said he had a good day.

This morning was the school play. He arrived in school and was sick again.

I phoned another doctor who knows his history of vomitting due to anxiety or excitment. She has written a note that says he should stay at home until after the holidays.

It isn't ideal. But it is a relief because. I can't get anything done because I have to stay in incase school phones. Then I have to go to the GPs if he has been ill. And all these upsets are affecting him and we really need some calm.

This note will cover me so no-one can say I am deliberately keeping him off school.

We need to meet with school next year and talk about what we can do.

When I went to get him, he said he still wanted to do the play because he wanted to "impress" me. Bless.

But I admit, we've all had enough and need the break.

[Saneasever]

Just wanted to say that I can more than empathise with your situation. I've actually got in place an agreement with one of my daughter's doctors where I don't take her in unless absolutely necessary, but phone for advice instead. My pharmacist is also very good on advice over the phone. Hope you have a more peaceful Christmas...

[jollypig]

My daughter had exactly the same problem at her old school she was diagnosed with stress ,in the end i withdrew her from school ,not as dramatic as it sounds as her statement and move to a special school was almost complete.

[Sally44]

He has been fine at home. No sickness. Relatively eventful free Christmas.

He was sick twice, once going into school and again 4 days later during registration.

He has to go back to the same school after the holidays, and we still have year six infront of us from September 2011 onwards.

The Clinical Psychologist has said he has no emotional literacy and needs input with this. But apparently they cannot tell the school what to do, and the school has just stopped him attending the Social Group which incorporated Emotional Literacy (apparently!!). But we have no evidence of what they actually taught and CP found no real skills at all in that area.

He would not/could not discuss any events at all. He didn't talk except to answer 'maybe' to the questions. He didn't look at or face the CP at all.

CP gave us a book to work through together which is helping to prod him and give him examples. That has been rather enlightening for him to say what upsets him in school and he has given a very detailed and lengthy discourse about how he feels about himself. Basically he says he is rubbish at everything and hates himself.

Edited December 29, 2010 by Sally44

[coolblue]

My son came to exactly the same conclusion at one point. Realised, talking to him, that the only model of achievement he had was school, which, understandably, focussed on his weaknesses but in doing so reinforced his sense of inadequacy and failure, and his only model of social interaction was one which involved a lot of noise, conversation, movement etc, that he couldn't participate in.

 

Introduced him to the idea of the contemplative lifestyle - that throughout history there have been hermits, sages, and entire communities that have deliberately isolated themselves from the rest of the world in order to focus on whatever they wanted to focus on. We looked at a range of communities from self-sufficient communes to monasteries and universities, from the Romans to the present day. By working on his strengths, and ignoring his weaknesses completely in the short-term, we managed to shore up his self-esteem sufficiently for him to start learning stuff, seeing progress, getting an understanding of how the world (as distinct from the education system) worked.

 

He now knows he's not stupid, that he's entitled to a suitable education (suitable to him, that is), that there are some things he's good at and some things he's not good at, and, more importantly, that there are communities of people out there where he would fit right in and could be a valued member.

 

It's been a long, hard slog and something he shouldn't have had to go through. I've promised him when he goes back to school, that we won't let the same thing happen to him again, and I think he's now sure enough of himself to stand his ground and question things he can't cope with. I hope so, at least, though of course everyone has their limits.

 

I just don't understand how any school could allow what's happened to your son to take place, without questioning how it was addressing the issue. I'll be thinking of you and your boy next week.

 

cb