Parly Report post Posted April 8, 2011 (edited) Sure he has some difficulties, but by Jove my Son doesn’t half come up / out with some diamond comments, many of which defy a response. Here are a few of his best - “How do you make the Tardis look so much bigger on the inside?” (To a BBC designer who had invited a packed out audience to ask questions about special effects on Dr Who) The head teacher was outside school asking parents who owned the silver Hyundai that was blocking an entrance outside the church - “Does anyone know whom this car belongs to?” “It’s God’s car - isn’t it?” Whilst discussing the topic of epitaphs in class, the teacher asked everyone to give an example of what sort of they think should go on a person’s gravestone. “Waaaahh!!! it’s dark – I don’t like it!!” Bossy teacher told everyone to find something in the class, predict how long they thought it would be, then measure it, record it and compare with their prediction. Sam hadn’t quite grasped everything and asked if he could measure anything Bossy huffed and said “Yes Sam! I’ve already said – ANYTHING” “OK” Ten minutes later – bossy asked everyone to read out what they’d measured and when it was Sam’s turn, he stood up and said. “I chose a 30cm ruler. I predicted it would measure 30cm. I measured the ruler and it was 30cm long. My prediction was very accurate” Touché Sam... play on. Edited April 8, 2011 by Parly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GaryS Report post Posted April 8, 2011 DS had his first opticians appointment this week. While he was still covering the first eye, the optician said "Now please cover the other eye"........ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Parly Report post Posted April 8, 2011 (edited) DS had his first opticians appointment this week. While he was still covering the first eye, the optician said "Now please cover the other eye"........ :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: First thing that came into my head when I read that was - "Aaaahhh see - now when I do that I can't see anything. Does that mean I'll need glasses?" Edited April 8, 2011 by Parly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted April 8, 2011 Bossy teacher told everyone to find something in the class, predict how long they thought it would be, then measure it, record it and compare with their prediction. Sam hadn’t quite grasped everything and asked if he could measure anything Bossy huffed and said “Yes Sam! I’ve already said – ANYTHING” “OK” Ten minutes later – bossy asked everyone to read out what they’d measured and when it was Sam’s turn, he stood up and said. “I chose a 30cm ruler. I predicted it would measure 30cm. I measured the ruler and it was 30cm long. My prediction was very accurate” Touché Sam... play on. I love that!! Just the sort of kid I love teaching as it totally appeals to my sense of humour (also known as my unwavering knack of annoying people). However, unless he had one of the old wooden rulers, I would actually be bringing him up on his answer, because most rulers extend beyond the 0 and the 30 a little way to allow for damage and accurate line drawing... "Aaaahhh see ... or not see, as the case may be... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Parly Report post Posted April 8, 2011 I love that!! Just the sort of kid I love teaching as it totally appeals to my sense of humour (also known as my unwavering knack of annoying people). However, unless he had one of the old wooden rulers, I would actually be bringing him up on his answer, because most rulers extend beyond the 0 and the 30 a little way to allow for damage and accurate line drawing... I wish all teachers would give that sort of response! Mrs Bossy isn’t that type though I’m afraid. I think she half thought I’d turn crimson and apologise for Sam’s insolence etc but before she could even finish quoting Sam’s little speech, I fell about laughing. :lol: I remember we had an ace conversation once in the car when he was about six. He was sat in the front seat and I pulled over to the side of the road to let a fire engine go past, which had lights and sirens on full go. Sam said, “I wonder if they’re going to a cat stuck up a tree?” “No bud. I don’t think they’ll be going to a cat stuck up a tree” “They might be. How do you know they’re not?” “Because they have sirens and lights on. That means they are on an emergency call” “Well why wouldn’t it be an emergency to help a cat stuck up a tree? That could still be an emergency” “If there has been a bad car accident and people are trapped in the cars, that’s an emergency. They need to get there quickly. If a building is on fire, that is an emergency and they have to get there quickly. A cat stuck up a tree isn’t exactly an emergency is it?” (Long pause) “Well... what if the cat’s on fire? Would that be an emergency?” Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted April 8, 2011 (Long pause) “Well... what if the cat’s on fire? Would that be an emergency?” :clap: He should be script writing for the Simpsons! I can just imagine Bart on the phone to the Fire-Department whilst holding up a magnifying glass to the cat's fur to catch the sun-light... But a question ... why does it only apply to cats with long paws... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted April 12, 2011 Words a mother dreads hearing on the phone from her adult off-spring: 'I need assistance!!' ...'How do you make a red wine sauce??' Bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
