Flapping

[SjB1]

Hi all

 

Wondered whether anyone or their children have received any kind of therapy to reduce flapping when in public.

 

My son does it a lot and I don't want the other kids to tease him when he starts school so was wondering whether anything could be done to help?

 

Thanks.

[sesley]

I don't know of any therapy to stop it,its a sign i guess from of anxiety feelings and excitement.He does it a lot less now he is 11 mine jumps up and down an flaps when he is of the both i mentioned. The more mine became more confident and able to excel excitement energy some other way like playing in the park or going for a walk the less it seems to get.

[baddad]

Hi SJB -

 

If you can, I think you need to try to relax a bit on this... Give him occassional gentle reminders if he's flapping in really inappropriate situations, and you could try redirecting his attention in other ways, but at 3.5 (which I think you said in your last post is his age) some 'flapping' is pretty much par for the course in very exciting (and/or possibly stressful) situations. Younger kids, in reception and primary classes, don't generally get judgemental about that kind of this so you've probably got a couple of years for him to calm down before it starts to attract negative comments. Even then you're likely to find that the kids who are friendly won't be bothered by it, and the ones that aren't will just find something else to be judgemental about anyway

If he is flapping for 'autistic' reasons (again, from your last post I seem to remember that's pretty speculative at this point) then chances are that any attempt to 'fix' flapping will produce an alternative behaviour, and the problem with that is you don't know what you're going to get. Actually, I don't know whether that would just be an 'autistic' liklihood or whether it would apply to most kids of his age who had developed a behaviour that was a 'comfort' or stress-reduction strategy(?)

You may find the flapping just sort of evolves into something else anyway - hair twiddling, sleeve chewing, leg tapping, nose picking (ewww), face pulling... there's all sorts of variations, and kids will often 'cycle' through all of them.

 

A couple of things that might help as 'alternatives' or distractions: He could carry a small piece of blu-tack around for 'squishing', or wear cheap lovebead bracelets or wrist bands or elastic bands for 'twiddling' (dunno if there's any 'charidee' bands doing the rounds, but my son wore a 'stop poverty now' wristband for a year or so, and at a pahnd a shot and going to a good cause it was a cheap and positive alternative too!).

Hope that's helpful

 

L&P

 

BD

[bid]

With such a little kid, I think you need to be very careful not to draw attention to things like flapping, because you risk either making him feel self-conscious about himself, or inadvertantly encouraging the behaviour as it gains lots of attention.

 

In the grand scheme of things does it really matter at 3 1/2? Probably not really, and as BD says, you may end up suppressing the flapping only to have it replaced with something far worse, such as hand-biting.

 

ETA: I am an adult with a dx of AS, and I still flap if I'm excited or very stressed...and I've managed to have a perfectly regular life with a family and a full-time job

 

Bid

Edited May 3, 2011 by bid

[SjB1]

Hi thank you all so much for your replies! Very helpful.

 

I love hearing people diagnosed with AS have families and are successful.

 

Yeah youre right i am very conscious of making him feel bad about it. I mainly only point it out if he is very near people as he could hit them.

 

I was just projecting into the future and imagining his teachers just thinking he couldnt keep still - that is if we didn't get a diagnosis, if we did then theyd understand.

 

Useful tips about the twisting beads etc. He already twusts his hair lol! We call it him making little dreadlocks, you cant brush it after!

 

While im on here, instead of putting new thread up......

Wanted to ask if you had any feedback on boys being behind physically due to AS?

Its just my sons being taking part in a class involving very basic ball skills. Its just meant to be fun and the teacher is very kind and encouraging but my son struggles with this type of thing. Especially following instructions. E.g if he was to just kick a ball hed do it ok but when asked to do it in a certain way he doesnt seem to get it.

Anyway just wondered if this is something in children with AS that they grow out of and catch up or whether it continues into adulthood?

So would more fun physical types of play help him improve?

 

Thanks again!

[baddad]

 

While im on here, instead of putting new thread up......

Wanted to ask if you had any feedback on boys being behind physically due to AS?

Its just my sons being taking part in a class involving very basic ball skills. Its just meant to be fun and the teacher is very kind and encouraging but my son struggles with this type of thing. Especially following instructions. E.g if he was to just kick a ball hed do it ok but when asked to do it in a certain way he doesnt seem to get it.

Anyway just wondered if this is something in children with AS that they grow out of and catch up or whether it continues into adulthood?

So would more fun physical types of play help him improve?

 

Thanks again!

 

Don't worry about starting new threads - the more the better! The downside of bunging your new Q in this thread is that anyone looking for info on Gross Motor Skills will miss it, iyswim...

 

Anyhoo - There's a big 'crossover' in autism and dyspraxia, with many AS kids having dyspraxia as a co-morbid. I don't know what statistics are like on dyspraxia, but I wouldn't be at all surprised to hear that dx figures for it were falling as more kids who previously would have been placed under that umbrella (term) find themselves under the autism umbrella instead (or possibly as well as). Not sure if that's a good or bad thing, TBH, but as it's all speculative anyway I guess it's something of a moot point!

 

Anyway - dyspraxia (sometimes known as 'clumsy child syndrome') means compromises in fine and gross motor skills, potentially making anything from stuff like using cutlery/pens/pencils up to kicking or catching a ball, Balance, PE, riding a bike etc difficult. It is defintely worth doing a bit of research on dyspraxia, esp if autism doesn't seem to quite fit the bill for your son, as the mix of 'symptoms' can be very similar and go Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy beyond just the physical stuff I mentioned.

 

here's a link to a wiki article - hardly definitive stuff, but it'll give you some pointers. If you scroll down, you'll see more of the 'AS' symptoms, like memory, sequencing etc.

 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dyspraxia

 

Also - if it's good enough for Harry Potter...

 

L&P

 

BD

Edited May 9, 2011 by baddad

[sesley]

how are the instructions put to your son? does he understand the language? maybe they should give him picture instructions if he can see better in pictures. When you and the teachers speak to him do they keep the language very simple to his comprehension and give time to process. The instrctions should be given for one thing at a time,too much langauge maybe impossible for him to follow.

[mugglemum]

My son (aged 9 and newly diagnosed AS) used to wave his arms around it circles when he was anxious - he paced up and down swinging his arms and was distressed if he couldnt. Now he does a funny thing with his hands instead - we never stopped him swinging his arms it just changed to something else and is so much more manageable.

 

In terms of physical things - he cannot use a knife and fork, cannot skip, cannot ride a bike, was struggling with swimming although with one to one lessons this has improved. We have just got a diagnosis and I am going into school on Friday to speak to SENCO for the first time - all new, scary and challenging but great that people are finally recognising what I have seen for years

[SjB1]

Hi guys

 

Interesting I will look up dyspraxia later.

 

Also I always assumed the riding the bike thing was the pedalling, didn't realise people with aspergers had trouble with the balancing.

 

I was definitely thinking my son would need one to one swimming lessons too.

[SjB1]

My son (aged 9 and newly diagnosed AS) used to wave his arms around it circles when he was anxious - he paced up and down swinging his arms and was distressed if he couldnt. Now he does a funny thing with his hands instead - we never stopped him swinging his arms it just changed to something else and is so much more manageable.

 

In terms of physical things - he cannot use a knife and fork, cannot skip, cannot ride a bike, was struggling with swimming although with one to one lessons this has improved. We have just got a diagnosis and I am going into school on Friday to speak to SENCO for the first time - all new, scary and challenging but great that people are finally recognising what I have seen for years

 

Hi

 

Must of good to finally get a diagnosis.

 

How long did the process take? Did you already know he had aspergers?

 

How did you feel a diagnosis would benefit your son? That was another thread I put on here. Its just I wonder when I should go and see someone about my son if at all. I think he definitely has aspergers but hes getting on fine at nursery so I was wondering in what ways a diagnosis would help him or would it just make him feel different?

 

Thanks. Sorry for so many questions!