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Hi guys, something I read yesterday in an information booklet for parents with Autistic spectrum or related conditions, that gave me a different way to look at not only my sons condition but finally be at peace with how our life is unique and special...I wanted to share with anyone who is finding this hard, hope it helps you as it has helped me:)

 

" I thought I was going ot Paris. All my friends were going to Paris and I thought thats were I was going too...But I suddenly found I wasn't in Paris, I was in Amsterdam....I didn't want to go to Amsterdam. That wasn't were I set out to go...But now that I'm in Amsterdam and I'm looking around and Amsterdam is different to Paris...But actually its quite beautiful in it's own right...And why that was very powerful for me was because I stopped comparing...It was about stopping yourself from thinking you wanted to be in Paris and starting to look at Amsterdam and to think about what you can do there".

 

Another short part I totally agree with:

 

"You'll meet people in your life now that you never have met if you weren't setting out on this journey. You will meet the most genuine, the most kind, the most imaginative people, and if you weren't entering into this world, you would never had the opportunity to do that"!...

 

 

I know through my son I have grown to be more tolerant, more patient, my thoughts about what is really important in life has changed, he has made me more giving and being grateful for every little blessing that comes my way...OVERALL HE HAS MADE ME A BETTER PERSON:)!

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Thanks so much for putting that info up on here, it certainly does make you think. I totally agree with you I to through my son have grown to be a more tolerant and patient person. My son to has made me a better person, I used to be quite selfish but I like to think that I'm not selfish anymore, I've changed quite a bit through having Glen.

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Thanks so much for putting that info up on here, it certainly does make you think. I totally agree with you I to through my son have grown to be a more tolerant and patient person. My son to has made me a better person, I used to be quite selfish but I like to think that I'm not selfish anymore, I've changed quite a bit through having Glen.

 

Jeane, as tough as being a parent to a child with disabilities is our lives seem to be far richer in comparison to what our lives may have been without them:)...before there were always more bad days than good for me, but now each morning I wake up with knowing that this day will be unique and I will do my utmost to utilise the time, energy and the experiences in the best possible way...I don't sleep with a heavy heart anymore but with a sound knowledge that I have done my ultimate best...:)

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Amsterdam is beautiful!!!

 

Indeed:)...x

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I first read this a few years ago when I was part of an autism forum, and sooooo many people found it useful. In fact, my Mum mentioned it to me on Saturday when we were talking about my diagnosis, even though I was only diagnosed recently. I think there has to be some mourning for the child you thought you would have, and all the dreams and ambitions you have for that child, when if becomes apparent that you have a child who may not fulfil those things. But they could fulfil so many other things, things you never even contemplated! :) Another oft-used saying on the other forum was "welcome to the club that none of us wanted to join". I'm not sure if I entirely agree with this sentiment, but I certainly understand it. I would love to have a child, with or without ASC, but I wouldn't wish the heartache and pain of living with ASC on anyone. Anyway, Holland's awesome - my favourite flowers are tulips :)

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I first read this a few years ago when I was part of an autism forum, and sooooo many people found it useful. In fact, my Mum mentioned it to me on Saturday when we were talking about my diagnosis, even though I was only diagnosed recently. I think there has to be some mourning for the child you thought you would have, and all the dreams and ambitions you have for that child, when if becomes apparent that you have a child who may not fulfil those things. But they could fulfil so many other things, things you never even contemplated! :) Another oft-used saying on the other forum was "welcome to the club that none of us wanted to join". I'm not sure if I entirely agree with this sentiment, but I certainly understand it. I would love to have a child, with or without ASC, but I wouldn't wish the heartache and pain of living with ASC on anyone. Anyway, Holland's awesome - my favourite flowers are tulips :)

 

Hi rufusrufus:)...Do you know realistically, I don't know if there is anyone out there that is what is classed as "normal"...every single human being is unique in their own rights and yet have personality traits that place them at either one end of the spectrum or the other...Since my son was diagnosed afew years back, Ive noticed similar traits in everyone I meet or know...The challenge now is 'what is normal'?

 

My son is adopted...we were lucky to adopt a 4 month old baby...As far as my sons concernd I am his birth mum and a far as I'm concerned I gave birth to him...People from extended family have said some really hurtful things over the years thinking they were being caring... things like "you poor dear, God has eventually placed a child in your lap that has come with so many problems", she's only got one child and even his not all there'....nod, nod, tutt, tut...already feeling sorry for myself and fearful of what lies in the future and if I could cope, it hurt deep...but the love his showers on me, from endless kisses and cuddles to just sitting across me with love filled eyes studying my every facial curve and telling me that I'm the 'cutest mum in the world' and he wants to place my photo on facebook for eveyone to see...I would never have got that much love from anyone else, this is what makes him unique... his love makes up for everything we go through...

 

P.s Oh, the Tulips of Amsterdam are beautiful:)!!!...x

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Aww! He sounds amazing! I agree, there's no such thing as "normal" really, but people still try to fill our heads with a silly idea of what could be classed as "normal", or "typical". The irony is that if someone fulfilled every possible definition of "normality" they'd probably be considered weird! :)

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Aww! He sounds amazing! I agree, there's no such thing as "normal" really, but people still try to fill our heads with a silly idea of what could be classed as "normal", or "typical". The irony is that if someone fulfilled every possible definition of "normality" they'd probably be considered weird! :)

 

Agree 100%:)....x

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