Will my son be diagnosed - ever!!

[worried!!]

Hi

First I would like to say thank you to you all who relied to my other post yesterday in the Newbie forum!

 

And thank you Suze, for saying about the behaviour at school, as this seems to be my biggest hurdle with them.

 

When I wrote yesterday I was really annoyed and probably didn't explain myself very well.

I had just come back from the doctors who had said that he possiably may be ASD or have Attachment disorder.

He is now being refered to CAMHS.

 

The ASD - I have suspected he may be since he was very small, because of certain behaviours that he has presented since he was born.

Not sleeping, very obsessive, his liking for routine, hating change, not liking loud/strange noises, talking to people he didn't know, etc.

 

I requested he was tested when he was 4 and after lengthy tests I was told that he wasn't but a very shy child, I wasn't convinced, but because I was made to feel like a paranoid, over anxious mum, I left it. (Was told parenting classes would help me) and all advice I was given in helping him (like charts for routine during day etc, stop/go cards for talking are all ways, apparently, with helping ASD children)

 

I did keep raising it at his school, but because he is very quiet and follows rules, and attentive, and intelligence wise they don't have any concerns ( he is approx 2 yrs above his age in maths, and above average in everything else, except his handwriting is a bit dodgy) again I have been brushed off by teachers and the SENCO there. (Again told to go to parenting classes)

 

I plucked up the courage to go again to the childrens development doctor (same as I saw last time) because my sons behaviour can be very testing at times, especially out and about and when other people are around.

This was when I was told it maybe ASD or Attachment disorder. (Its the Attachement disorder issue I am worried about not ASD)

 

He is still very obsessive about his subject of the time, to the point that he can't talk about anything else or focus on anything else, and if I try to break his talking he will quite often ignore or I will get a one syllubul answer and his chatter will continue. He gets very stressed about very small things, very quickly, and is often tearful with it. His liking of routine and when and what time things are happening, still the noise thing, he will talk to other people depending on who will depend on how he speaks to them. I could go on!!

 

I have absolutley no problem with him being diagnosed with ASD, in fact it would be a relief for me. As myself and others (including parents with ASD kids) believe he has some form.

 

What I was horrifed about was the Attachment Disorder, after reading symptoms and causes, I was really angry, as this is definately not my son and definately not myself. I did speak to my 21 year old son about it who laughed his head off when I said I must be some drug addict, alcoholic mother!!

When all I am is a mum who loves her kids and want whats the best for them.

Edited January 10, 2013 by worried!!

[smileyK]

My mum was "labelled" an "over-protective" mother by juniors school SENCO which caused endless friction between them both as the blame was firmly laid at my mums door and that I didn't display enough classic signs to have official assessment /diagnosis of Clumsy Child Syndrome (Dyspraxia) but in the end it was proven my mums intial findings were correct just shows mothers gut nature instinct is so true shines through everything thrown at you continue to fight! Keep going to fight for your son and yourself waited long enough for the answers! He obviously showing classic ASD pointers heading that direction on the checklist!

[worried!!]

I agree, thank you, I could of gone on about him, but tried to keep it short!

 

I have always tried to keep going with it but do feel that I am being assessed myself!

 

I appreciate your reply, as new to understanding all this and really am interested in what others think. Even if they think I may be wrong!

 

[Sa Skimrande]

My ex wife's experience with her son, she got labelled a neurotic mother because she kept complaining about the same thing to the doctor, things she could see being his mother but was pushed away by the doctors and labelled, (she accessed her medical records), that was up until something did go wrong where her son was rushed to hospital where it turned out to be kidney failure.

 

Similarly I have experienced bad treatment from doctors, where it was suggested recently by an ex NHS hospital manager that I should take legal advice for it is clear doctors have failed in their duty of care.

[Suze]

Hi worried, its good you have been referred to CAMHS.You could try keeping a diary and jotting down triggers and behaviours.The camhs team will probably go back and talk to you about how he was as a baby etc.When is your appt to see them ?.........feel for you stand up for what you feel is right and what you believe is the matter with your son , best wishes x

[Soda]

Don't have experience of this myself, in fact my situation was sort of the opposite with lots of people thinking my daughter hd a problem and me not thinking she did. Actually that's just as hard. But it's hard because you start to doubt yourself and your instincts as a mummy. So no advice really... Just it's hard and hugs!

Soda

[worried!!]

I am now waiting to hear from CAMHS. However long that takes! But have decided that Im not going to let anyone brush me off this off this time, and I will nag until I am satisfied.

 

I just thought my son was being difficult when he was younger, it wasnt until I went into a shop with him when he was 3 that a woman whose daughter had Aspergers saw how my son was behaving and asked if he too had Aspergers. This put two and two together for me! So I had a stranger point it out to me!!!

 

I will also do the diary, as I want to go armed with as much evidence as possible!

[Suze]

Thats the thing........it can be intimidating seeing the experts , sometimes there are 3 of them in a room, nurse therapist and physch and it can be scary and make you forget what you wanted to say.So a diary and evidence is great.Some parents have filmed their kids during difficult moments and shown the experts this also.Please take another adult with you to the appt for support aswell.

[worried!!]

Thank you, I will this time as I have always gone on my own before.

I think his dad is going to come this time too, and I am also getting a letter from his childminder, who although has only recently started looking after him, has known him since he was 3.

I have started diary too, and I have also thought about recording him, so I may do that too, although bit difficult when your in a shop and people are looking and his throwing a paddy, but will try!!!

 

Thanks for the advice.