Aggression problems again

[DaisyProudfoot]

Oh dear we're having some bad days at the moment,

 

AS son seems to be constantly aggressive - screaming, shouting, hitting out at three out of four siblings (eldest almost 6 foot tall - he doesn't bother him).

 

The house is becoming a nightmare and my doors are almost falling off their hinges, his aggression is rubbing off on everyone - it's horrible.

 

This morning he even left the house following a meltdown (9 years old) and I knew where he was by following the trail of destruction left in his wake - wheely bin tipped over, trailer shoved to one side (all in the garden I hasten to add). He was hiding behind the kitchen wall when I found him.

 

I'm scared that as he grows older this is going to continue out into the street - I try to calm him down but he won't listen when he's like that.

 

It's a good job I'm posting this now, this morning it would have been twice as long!

 

Daisy

[Suze]

,Hi Daisy know how you feel, aggression /bad language, and defiance have escalated in our house during the hols, <'> <'> .

[lil_me]

<'> Daisy

 

I think most of us know this one all too well, the holidays have been one meltdown after another for most, luckily not long to go.

 

My son tends to do the most damage at home, kicking doors off hinges, smashed the steel bin I just bought until it looked like a piece of scrap metal. He rarely does this outdoors but when he does he tends to hit and kick my car, and has sometimes hit other peoples His little brother tends to get some of the aggression taken out of him but luckily even tho he's 4 he's taller than and twice the weight of his brother so he tends to get his own back.

 

The only way we can stop it is usually stopping whats causing the meltdowns before they start or watching for his facial movements etc as they can sometimes signal whats going to happen.

 

I'm thinking of buying him a punchbag for his room when he returns to school, save me, my son and my furniture and doors etc

[hev]

hello daisy,my steve had lots of meltdowns lately,really punched me hard twice yesterday,lost my temper and punched him back,not right thing to do i know as it all then gets worse and we both were upset,i just find it all so hard to deal with,i can give no advice just to say you are not alone

[lynyona]

hello daisy you arent alone on this one we ve all been there and no one as come up yet with a easy fix to the situation.Ive lost count of the stuff kieran as destroyed and the times he grabbed his younger brother by the throat,he hasnt actually attacked anyone as such usually the nearest thing gets his anger wall door dog(bless) but i can usually tell when he s got a meltdown brewing and can sometimes diffuse the situation but not often all we can do is keep pulling our hair out and yes many a day ive ended up crying as i sometime s feel i cant go on with his behaviour. thank goodness for forums like this one sometimes it is just a comfort to know thre are people out there going through the same. lynn

[Minxygal]

Isn't it awful when a thread like this can make you feel much better.

 

Mark has been in fine form this holiday, to the extent that on Thursday he hit me so hard he nearly knocked me off my feet. It's a situation I'm not happy about of course and protecting my youngest from him has become almost a full time job, but it relly does help to know I'm not alone with this one xx

[DaisyProudfoot]

Hi All,

 

Thanks for all your support It sounds like we're all having a hard time at the moment. Yesterday he threw another BIG ragie at his sister and I suggested he take it out on me instead as I was physically blocking him from reaching her.

 

I put up my hands to let him hit them and boy he hits hard - I think I'll enrole him in boxing classes, he could beat the top guys anyday! Anyway that diffused the situation thankfully - it's no wonder his sister gets so many bruises.

 

Trouble is his eldest brother in almost six foot, the next one down is over 5ft and M's almost shoulder height with me already - what happens when he reaches 6ft? I'll just have to stand on his feet or something!!!

 

Going on holiday in a few days time - 8 hour drive at least with seven of us in the car - this could be a long one!

 

Ta folks,

Daisy