A dilemma

[mina]

Hi all,

I have a dilemma regarding my son who is 23 years old and has a high functioning autism. He likes girls and would desperately want to have a relationship. He fantasising of getting married, having children. However, so far the society keeps rejecting him. He has no friends and his experiences with people are generally bad. He was being bullied in the past and has been often excluded, even from the groups he interacts online, although he is desperately trying to fit in.

My son and I are very close and he often talks to me about his feelings and desires. He says that I am the only friend he has and who accept him for who he is.

He is a beautiful, gentle , romantic and caring soul and pains me when I think what he has been through. He definitely deserves better.

My dilemma is: Should I encourage him in his belief that he will one day have a girlfriend and wife, not to loose hope, or tell him to accept the fact that this will probably never happen, just to be polite with people but to keep a low profile and get used to the idea that he will be alone all his life?

Any thoughts grately appreciated.

[Gold MD]

Is there a place he can go to where there are other autistic people? That may help in a lot of ways. Usually people with the same condition understand each other better.

[Aut_Scot]

Did you watch the Channel four tv series called "The Undateables" which follows a range of people on dates who have long term conditions, including: disabilities, developmental disorders (including autism), and learning difficulties. The series worked in conjunction with a dating agency.

Link to "The Undateables" website:

https://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-undateables

The series featured quite a few singles on the autistic spectrum, some of which found partners.  I am not show whether the show is still running but, perhaps a dating agency such the one featured in the programme would be helpful.

Edited October 7, 2022 by Aut_Scot
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