SPACE

[openyoureyes]

Hi all

 

I live in Poynton, Cheshire and some months ago along with some friends we set up a parents/carers support group in Macclesfield. As the tragic news unfolded of Alison and Ryan Davies my heart went out to all those parents/carers who suffer the day to day battle to get help and support for not only them but for their children who suffer with ASD, ADHD etc etc etc.

 

Our group meets up on the 3rd Monday of each month at the Boarhound Public house in Macclesfield at 7.30pm for around 2 hours. Just being able to talk to other people about our struggles and get advice from people who experience 24/7 what its like living with an autistic child/adult certainly helps. We occasionally have speakers and the 1st one was a lady who came to talk to the group about "STRESS". Even though we all get stressed about the usual day to day things it did seem that the group on the whole were hiding their feelings until the lady asked us to write down what we really feel like and what brings on the stress.

 

One lady from the group wrote loads, and they all related to a depressive state, ie she felt depressed, stressed, useless, out of control, etc etc. This lady attends the group regularly and up until then I had no idea she had these feelings and in the past we all sit around the table smiling and chatting. Its not till you really ask the right questions that people really open up.

 

I think that Social Services try to give help to some lucky people but they never ask that vital question, not just how are you coping? because your answer will always mostly be "OK" but the question needs to worded better. I went to the doctors last year with a thoat infection and felt really down. When the doctor sorted out the throat infection diagnosis, she then asked was everything else OK, I of course replied "yes", but then she asked me, are you sure as you seem a bit down. This opened the flood gates, I sat a cried my eyes out as this question made me immediatly think, NO, I'M NOT ALRIGHT. She was great and we talked about all sorts and that the underlying problem was that I felt so alone and needed just someone to talk too who really understood how I felt about the whole Autism thing and how to try and cope.

 

Its ok to cry but sometimes you need someone to cry with. I came out of the doctors determined to help other people who felt the same way.

 

This site is excellent to have a good old moan and the more people who know its hear the better. I have already picked up some great ideas from the site and will now be visiting every day - thanks Suze

 

Should any of you live in East Cheshire please try and attend our group as its a great place to meet people in the same boat and chat, we also arrange days out for the whole family, the next one being on Sunday 15th May at Tatton Park if you are interested email me at info.space@hotmail.com we would love to see more members.

 

thanks for all your time in reading this and lets hope that the death of Alison and Ryan does not just fade away, we must be positive and think of anything that will highlight our plight as parents to do the best by our children and get the help they need without having to fight all the time with schools, social services etc

 

if we all pull together life can and will get better.

 

When I heard about this tradgerdy I got onto Radio 5 Live, then the BBC rang me up, then our local newspaper wanted to write a piece, so if we all got intouch with the media I am sure we could get more publicity about the appauling help we receive - go on get out there and SHOUT

[Suze]

what a dumbo Iam completely missed this ........well done Cheryl super/mum/woman/wife/mate

[rainbow queen]

hello cheryl[its marie ]

saw your article in the paper -well done for highlighting everything. <'>