Peer education in ASD

[Flora]

Has anyone had experience of their child's year group being educated about a child with an ASD?

 

William's outreach teacher wants to go into the secondary school in the first week of term to educate William's year group about his specific difficulties. He told me that he's done this many times and often the kids that WOULD normally bully a child like William become very protective of them.

 

Lauren

[Tez]

Lauren

 

I think that the reaction depends upon the school and the children. The EP wrote in A's report that this should happen in A's school if he was ever to return. It was incorporated into his draft statement. I was uneasy about this and spoke to A's Deputy Head about it. He too was uncomfortable. A's school has a very bad bullying problem and A himself was very badly bullied. The Deputy Head said that they had tried this with other vulnerable pupils and it had just made the problem worse.

 

However, I also know of cases in other schools where it has been tried and worked well. It was also suggested to me that if the other children were aware of the difficulties and still bullied then, the school could come down hard on them because there could be no excuse. However, the school is very limited in what actions they can take and to an ASD child subtle teasing can be construed as bullying. Sorry, I know that doesn't really help, but I think that you need to go with your instincts on this one. How would William feel about others knowing? A made a few friends at school who he trusted and told about his difficulties. They were very supportive and were actually very protective of him.

Edited June 18, 2006 by Tez

[Flora]

Tez,

 

I have exactly the same reservations about this as you have expressed.

 

I really am in two minds about it.

 

On the one hand it may make things easier for him in may ways, but then I think it will draw attention to him in a negative way, although the way he is just now he's going to be so lost and the fact that he will have a dedicated LSA and will be wearing glasses with red lenses will draw attention anyway.

 

The school does have a reputation for bullies. Something of great concern to me is that there is a boy who will by in year 8 who was almost expelled from the primary school for bullying William. Last year this same boy nearly got a friend of mines daughter expelled from 6th form! She is a goth and although he was only in year 7 and she was was in the lower 6th he mercillesly bullied her, for the way she dressed, on the bus for weeks; in the end she walloped him and was almost expelled until a group of kids from the bus went en masse to the HT to tell them about the bullying. Also, my daughter goes to an all girls school in another town and some of her friends have come there from the other school because they were being bullied and the school were unable (?) to prevent it.

 

I will discuss the question on whether to tell the other kids at my next meeting with the SENCO.

 

I will be watching things like a hawk when William goes to this school.

 

Thanks for your response Tez.

 

Lauren X

Edited June 18, 2006 by Lauren

[Zemanski]

com's class had general disability education and I think it covered stuff relevant to AS but I don't thnk it was directly focused on him.

Some of the kids did respond well, a group of girls was particularly good for a while, but others were going to bully him no matter what. It was OK while he had his full 1-1 support but as soon as that broke down the bullies saw their opening. They even bullied other kids to stop them talking to him. They learned very quickly how to push his buttons in ways that seemed invisible to staff (a quick brush of a hand across his back, a whisper of nonsense as they passed, etc) it took a long time and a lot of distress before the school would accept that Com couldn't tolerate the constant harrassment. These kids knew Com couldn't identify them and played on it.

 

There are pros and cons with telling, I'm sure most of the group were fine with it but I do wonder if it exposed Com to these kids, giving them a better understanding of just how to get at him and emphasising his differences which, given purple glasses and a wacky hair cut, were pretty obvious from day one. I do think a general education about disability is important though

 

Zemanski

[Tez]

There are pros and cons with telling, I'm sure most of the group were fine with it but I do wonder if it exposed Com to these kids, giving them a better understanding of just how to get at him and emphasising his differences which, given purple glasses and a wacky hair cut, were pretty obvious from day one. I do think a general education about disability is important though

 

This was exactly my fear and A's Deputy Head confirmed that this was what had happened when they'd tried this in the past. I agree though that general education about disability, acceptance and tolerance is important though.

[phasmid]

However, the school is very limited in what actions they can take and to an ASD child subtle teasing can be construed as bullying.

 

Maybe not...if a child knows that one of their peers has a disability and still persists in bullying them as a result of this then the school must act. Failing to do so is not making 'reasonable adjustments' under the terms of the DDA 2005 as a disabled child, particularly those with the 'hidden disabilities' are known to be vulnerable and should, therefore, be better protected (for want of a better term). This could leave the school wide open to prosecution.

[Zemanski]

the trouble is getting the school to understand that what constitutes bullying for an AS kid is so often stuff that is pretty normal for other kids - the subtlety of the bullies and the inability to express his feelings or describe what was really happening to him made it very difficult to even work out what was going on until it had reached desperate heights. Once it was recognised they understood that it needed to be dealt with.

 

comes down to lack of awareness again

 

Zemanski

[oracle]

I have to agree with Phasmid here and by the way failing to do peer awareness could be seen as a school not giving a child with a disability every chance to 'enjoy and achieve' which is one of the five aims in Every Child Matters. With regard to bullying I think that it can be a double edge sword but if the peer group are aware and then bully the school need kicking into touch if they fail to act. Many schools do not do peer awareness training because they are lazy and don't want to pick up the fall out should it happen. We have a parent in our group who wants peer awareness as they are calling her son a freak and a spaca. The school have ask the parents if they want a beacon attached to the child's head. But what if the child was in a wheel chair? I would think that bullying then would be stamped on really hard. Why should it be different with our children? I know that the Disability Discrimination People are now very active and coming down on schools like a ton of bricks where they fail in their duties and it's about time too.

 

I do however think that there is another angle in this particular case. What does William think about this? he is not a baby anymore and I think he deserves a say in this. I personally feel that peer awareness should begin in Nursery and it should cover multi disabilities just as we look at different religions and cultures. Then there would be no need to single a child out. When a child is young then it is the parents choice for the peer group to be educated by in my opinion when a child reaches a certain age then they deserve a say in the matter. I have chosen for Matthew and his friends to be aware and that means that Matthew will be unable to put the clock back should he ever change his mind. But if he meets new friends then even at 9 I think it's up to him to decided. As it stands at the moment he has no problems with people knowing probably because we are so laid back about ASD in our house. He may change his mind as he gets older and realises that not everyone has the same attitude as we do.

 

In some respects we can't have it all ways. We fight for our kids to be accepted and included but how can that ever be is we then use a blind fold and a gag?

 

Oracle

[Zemanski]

good point - I ask Com periodically how he feels about people knowing, or me discussing his problems with people, he says he doesn't mind adults and close friends knowing but is very wary of letting peers know these days. (I asked him before using him as a case study for my last assignment and he was fine with that)I don't think school considered asking him, they didn't ask me either but then most was general information as far as I'm aware.

 

To be honest, I don't know exactly what his class were told about him but I think his reluctance for peers to know has a lot to do with the bullying.

 

One thing I did ask for from the beginning was a buddying set up as Com arrived in the school with no social connections whatsoever (it never happened). I wonder if it might be best to set up such a group of children who can be trusted to look out for a child and support them and give them the information rather than a whole class indiscriminately?

 

Z

[Flora]

I do however think that there is another angle in this particular case. What does William think about this? he is not a baby anymore and I think he deserves a say in this.Oracle

 

Oracle

 

There is no way that anything will be done without William's agreement. First of all I would never allow it to happen if he didn't agree, but also the outreach teacher has already said that it can't be done without William's permission.

 

It's such a hard decision though; he's quite willing to discuss his AS and various difficulties with me but I feel very sad to have to approach him about putting all his peers in the picture. It's a tragedy that we have to live with the fact that many people young and old alike look upon autism as something to either ridicule or to be ashamed of.

 

I have to do some long hard thinking and value the thoughts and opinions of everyone here.

 

Lauren

[Flora]

One thing I did ask for from the beginning was a buddying set up as Com arrived in the school with no social connections whatsoever (it never happened). I wonder if it might be best to set up such a group of children who can be trusted to look out for a child and support them and give them the information rather than a whole class indiscriminately?

 

Z

 

Zemanski

 

The secondary run this thing called 'circle of friends'. I'm not sure how succesful it is though.

 

Lauren

[LizK]

One thing I did ask for from the beginning was a buddying set up as Com arrived in the school with no social connections whatsoever (it never happened). I wonder if it might be best to set up such a group of children who can be trusted to look out for a child and support them and give them the information rather than a whole class indiscriminately?

 

Adam is only four and just starting out at school but one thing his teacher (SENCO) has organised is for him to have a 'helper' each day. This child will pair up with Adam at PE or singing, does some of his special activities and if Adam is taken out for a jog or to the obstacle course will often go with him. It's a different child each day but the children who have taken to this role tend to be chosen more often and are starting to now look after him. The school have employed this successfully with an older boy with ASD and his peers are fighting to be chosen each day! For Adam it has helped him feel like he has friends which has been important to him and hopefully will encourage the other children to accept him especially if buddying up with him means a treat like going on the obstacle course!

 

Reading posts like this does make me worry about the future for Adam. At the moment he is cocooned in a protective environment with kids who don't really seem to bother that he's different (though they've figured out he is) and whom are remarkably tolerant of him pushing and poking them. Hopefully these kids will continue to be tolerant but he will be mixing with other children as he gets older and kids can be so cruel

 

Lx

[Zemanski]

if peer support is established early it tends to stick, I think - Com made (with a lot of input from me and nursery) 3 good friends who pretty much saw him through primary and still remain loyal and supportive. The sad thing for Com was that he had to leave them to go to high school (several reasons, unavoidable). things may have worked out differently if the LEA had recognised their needs properly.

 

starting to build relationships at nursery age may well save a lot of heartache for your son later

 

Zemanski

[Suze]

<'> hi lauren, we ,ve had experience of this .In sept j was having a bad time with several boys, to cut a long story short our autism advisor went in to school and spent over an hour with my sons class.I was really worried about this, but felt that as things at the time were so bad it could,nt possibly get worse .The advisors were really happy at the responses the kids gave them.........they all knew j was a bit "weird" and could be angry and moody and a bit silly at times (their perceptions).The advisors went through ASD and the problems etc that our kids can have socially etc.Anyway the up shot was it did,nt stop these lads picking on him and name calling.Basically these kids are nasty and they just pick on any easy target.Butone good thing that did arise was the nice understanding kids ( most were are girls )now look out for j they stick up for him, help him and tell on the other kids when they are nasty and name calling.best of luck loz suzex <'>