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  2. Son was diagnosed 4/5 years ago. Its been a very tough time for him and the family....Good news is he's doing OK now. In 6th form doing his A-levels and, after lockdown blips, planning college.Been learning to drive. He's OK to be honest. Bit slow and hesitant and takes things a little too literally (as with everything)Failed his test xmas time because he was too hesitant but nearly.Had another test today. Lasted 9 minutes!!! They got back, Examiner refused to discuss with me. He was so upset, took me a while. They use a sat nav now for the tests. The examiner said to him - "you're not capable of using the sat nav so I'm cancelling the test".All because he got confused as to what turning the sat nav meant and went straight on instead of turning. Only twice. He's flagged as ASD when I booked the test and they're supposed to make allowances. No allowances given here! I don't think the examiner even knew.Absolutely fuming to be honest..... NINE MINUTES (and that includes probably 5 of those driving in and out from the test centre).I know my son - when he passes his test there is 1000% no way he's going to be doing 120mph down the M4 or doing donuts in Tesco car park. All the poor sod wants is to be able to drive to his GFs house.....I can probably appeal. Might get my £62 back but that's not important. Its 6 month waiting list for next test and, at the moment, his confidence is shot to bits because of this. He might decided he doesn't want to bother any more. I know people make mistakes but I'm just mad at this examiner, what a waste of oxygen he is. Honestly, if he was in front of me now... I'm STILL bomping mad.....
  3. Earlier
  4. I've got the feeling I have to make an update here: Now my son has reached age 17 I'm in fact moderating a self-help group of young people on the spectrum (aged 16-25), with (by now) 7 participants (4 male, 3 female). We're meeting every 4 weeks, since fall 2020 (the rules here allow face-2-face meetings of self-help groups for medical reasons for a number of diagnoses, e.g. autism, even during the lockdown phases).
  5. Or, for that matter, Signkid - the UK's first and only Deaf producer, writer and performer to have integrated British Sign Language into live hip-hop music performances.
  6. They keep on finding new variants of the virus. So I hate to say it, but I think it's here to stay.
  7. Do you think that COVID will still be a big problem in a years time? Merry Christmas.
  8. Bah humbug. Nope. We are still here. But COVID is here too.
  9. This is a series of 4 beginners' workshops into live coding music and art skills. These workshops will be run by Antonio Roberts who performs live coding music and art around the world. These workshops are a fun way of learning about coding creatively and on a free outsourced platform. Workshops will be at Birmingham Open Media from 18:00 - 20:00 with specific focus on: Wednesday 5th January – basic music coding Wednesday 12th January – layering music coding Wednesday 19th January – basic art coding Wednesday 26th January – merging music and art coding More information here
  10. There is a BBC1 television programme at 21:00 hrs on Wednesday, 1st December 2021 that might be of interest to members of this site. It is called "Paddy and Christine McGuinness: Our Family and Autism" With his three children diagnosed with autism, Paddy McGuinness explores the condition. Link to programme website: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0b5l3lq Programme should be available on iPlayer shortly after its television broadcast.
  11. Story on the BBC news site: "Melanie Sykes and Christine McGuinness praised for openness about autism diagnosis Autism campaigners and charities have said it is "brilliant that more and more people in the public eye" are talking openly about being diagnosed as adults. ... ": https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-59352983
  12. Story on the BBC news site: "Autistic Hull man goes home after 15 years in hospital A man with autism who has spent nearly half his life detained in a mental health hospital has been released after a long campaign by his mother. … " https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-59225870
  13. Hi I notice your username indicates you're in Bristol? There are a few organisations there that accept self diagnosed adults. One is DiverseUK which run a range of meet up groups in Bristol. The other I'd based in Bath, Bath Autism and Neurodiversity spectrums cic. Feel free to private message me for more details.
  14. Perfectionism in autism can look like symptoms of an eating disorder (or as an updated term is used, 'disordered eating'). Unfortunately the only researcher I've come across that's studied disordered eating in autistics wasn't very open to questions or feedback on her research from autistics. In fact a couple of people (myself included) walked out of her talk in disgrace as she was so dismissive. You might want to look up "selective eating in autism" as that concentrates on textures etc in foods. But when it becomes a problem, would be when your health is adversely affected by what you're eating (and/or not eating). Only a medical professional can tell you that for sure. But there are also helplines for disordered eating if you are concerned. https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/get-information-and-support/get-help-for-myself/i-need-support-now/helplines/
  15. Depends on the diagnosis, who made it and when. Sometimes you can have an updated assessment which can then allow you to add a note to your file stating why this information is inaccurate.
  16. To add to this, any unauthorised research posted on the forum will be deleted without warning. You must have your project approved by moderators and show ethical approval to a moderator beforehand, no exceptions.
  17. There is a book that some of you might find to be of interest called "Autistic Community and the Neurodiversity Movement", information here: https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007/978-981-13-8437-0 The ebook can be downloaded here: https://link.springer.com/content/pdf/10.1007%2F978-981-13-8437-0.pdf
  18. If you take yourself and or your disabled adult/child to none gp medical appointments (including community dental appointments), then you can claim travel refunds via filling in and sending off (I'd do it 2 months before as it takes a while to get to the correct department) a HC5(t) form. https://www.nhsbsa.nhs.uk/nhs-low-income-scheme
  19. Recitative & Song from La vision de la reine by Augusta Holmes, arranged by Stephen Isserlis https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3Hc7HmYXlA
  20. I quite like "Incrowd hangout" by a 1960s group called "The Deejays": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfKB4qMeNQ8
  21. George Gershwin, Variations on I Got Rhythm
  22. Seen on BBC news web page: "Early baby therapy could reduce autism diagnoses Training parents how to respond to babies showing early signs of autism could reduce by two-thirds the number of three-year-olds meeting the criteria for diagnosis, a small study suggests. ... " https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-58626945
  23. (Not written by me) Showman Milly Ayers has become the first student from a travelling family to win a place studying Classics at Oxford, hailing the prestigious place as “a win for the entire fairground community.” A showman from Chertsey has become only the third student from a travelling family to win a place at Oxford, having taught herself Classics after leaving school at 13. Milly Ayers, who has worked on fairgrounds since she was three years old, will join St John’s College this September, and hailed the news as a victory for Showmen. “My success is a win for the entire fairground community, and if any good comes out of that, I’ll be over the moon,” Ayers told the Oxford Mail. “Perhaps while I am there I can show people that showmen and travellers in general aren’t these stupid Neanderthals like the stereotypes suggest.” Ayers was raised as part of a traditional travelling Showmen family, and spent most of her childhood helping both her parents and grandparents operate rides, strikers and food stands. Despite attending primary school, Ayers – who has autism and Asperger’s – found that the secondary school system was not “a good fit,” and left school in order to give herself an education beyond the state syllabus. “It wasn’t a traditional education by any means, it was very flexible, but I suppose because I’d always had that love of education, of learning, I was able – with the help of my parents and everything – to find a way that suited me.” Over the next three years, Ayers taught herself the GCSE syllabus by studying books, watching documentaries, and visiting museums and historical sites, and though she dismisses the grades she achieved as “pretty average,” her studies allowed her to pursue A-Levels in English, History and Classics at college. With higher education a long-time goal, Ayers then looked to Oxford, and found support through mentoring organisation Zero Gravity – which paired Ayers with a Cambridge PhD student during the admissions process. “I’m really excited to be able to go and learn there,” Ayers told Steph McGovern during an interview on Steph’s Packed Lunch. “I think it’s a good opportunity not just for me but for the entire Showmen community, to put our voices out there and show that we do exist, and we are capable.” Milly Ayers made her national TV debut on Channel 4 recently explaining life on the road and her self-education journey to Oxford University. “It’s a good opportunity to put our voices out there,” she explained to a live audience. “We’re a community, now recognised, and I want to try to educate people about who we are.” Well, Milly is an intellect who decided to leave school at 13 due to autism and went on to pursue her ‘love for the ancient world’ by studying classics. From the age of three, she has lived the fairgrounds, travelling the country opening up and down working the markets and fetes. “We’re primarily businessmen,” she explained proudly. But education, and a switch to one of the world’s top five universities, has drawn the fairground teenager. But it hasn’t all been comfortable. That journey, she explained, has included insults and signs daubed outside the yard her family live in. But she’s going to work on that: “That’s what I want to change,” she confirmed. And no doubting she will. An engaging character, Milly has attracted a wave of support from the travelling community and beyond. Her blog Antigine Journal includes a Showman’s Odyssey, and her Channel 4 interview drew widespread plaudits: “So inspiring and a fantastic representation of our community”; “You’re a credit”; “a wonderful advert for showmen and women.” Ayers certainly rocks. Source: Coinslot A more detailed article about Milly Ayers has appeared in the Daily Express, according to PressReader, but I'm unable to access the article directly. Fairground traveller Milly wins a place at Oxford
  24. Your feelings regarding your experiences with your ex wife are totally understandable. I had to leave my last place because of gaslighting myself. I haven't been dating recently myself so am unable to give much advice. Be guided on what your new partner says. Ask your partner what their mother likes to talk about. Then pick 2 or 3 of her hobbies that you both have in common and go from there. My mother likes to talk about serial dramas, my latest embroidery pieces, what I've been doing that week. So I stick to those subjects. I'm currently working on starts and ends to conversations. I'm particularly hard at ending conversations.
  25. It is normal to feel some amount of anxiety even for people without any conditions. Things that could help to deal with anxiety inducing situations depends largely on your individual, but often can include firstly letting others know about your condition(s), things that could make the situation less unpredictable- ie talking through with your partner beforehand whats the general plan, and some things that may likely happen, etc, (keeping in mind that obviously some things may change and its ok-easier said than done, i know), finding something that works for you to reduce stress if things get too much, ie, planning where you can go to have some space and calm down, or some item you can fidget with, etc, and finding something that would help reduce stress before or after the event, ie a comforting ritual, having 5 minutes to chill listening to music, some like yoga or meditation, some like arranging or doubble checking some things etc. If your partner understands your situation, they shoudl be able to accommodate it at least to some extent to make it easier for you, keeping in mind that any relationship is give and take, meaning if she is going out of her way to adjust and accommodate, you should try do so aswell, when you can. There will be some things you cant do as well as expected, but there are certainly things you can do for her, and can do them well. Im sure of it. Relationships tend to fail if the (generally multiple)needs of one or both parties is persistently unmet(ignored)/insufficiently met. Communications is important (unfortunately!). If you find out what she wants or needs and what her visions for the future are and let her know yours, i am sure you two can figure things out:)
  26. Hi. I am 31y old, also with asd. It is a bit of a difficult question in the sense as we do not know him and what is important for him, but i would say it is correct that ritual/like behaviours are usually caused by an attempt to create a predictable environment with specific known actions, in a form of stress management. The choice of action can be changed, obviously, but should come from a decision of his own. personally id suggest to think the topic through and discuss it with him, why is this activity important to him, what is positive about it, and what is not so positive about it, and raise your concern that while you understand this is something he likes and makes him feel better, that you think in long run its not a good thing to be doing continuously as an adult and maybe discuss looking into some other things he may like doing instead that wouldnt be something that would have so much impact on others around him in the future(or any other outcome you may have in mind Keep in mind that unless theres a drastic change in current environment, the need for something ritualised like this wont go away, and is simply likely to be replaced by somehting sort of similar in its basic nature in regarding to the function it fulfills). But definetly give it some time to process and figure it out, rather than cause any abrupt changes. It may help to also ask his opinion(without pushing yours on them) what he would think if the neighbor started doing something similar or one of his peers, if he saw them doing something like this, especially a role play of some other childrens series he doesnt like as much. And what does he think they would think of him if they saw it. And draw a parralel that anyone outside the family may feel the same regarding his behaviour (if his opinion is similar to reality). this approach may cause some self complex and insecurity, while trying to work it through and find something else he would be comfortable with, but can work as a quick catalyst in a change of behaviour regarding it
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