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  2. Autism story from the BBC website: "Bubble wall helps non-verbal boy with autism to speak A mother has described how a bubble wall in the family kitchen prompted her usually non-verbal five-year-old son to start naming the colours he could see. ... ". https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-derbyshire-57360503
  3. Latest edition of "1800 Seconds on Autism", titled "Neurotypicals are baffling".: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p09jpz1p All episodes of "1800 Seconds on Autism": https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p06sdq0x/episodes/player
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  5. Has there been any recent research into GCSE subjects taken by students with AS? In particular: 1. Which optional subjects they are more inclined to take and which subjects they are more inclined not to take? 2. Which subjects they tend to struggle badly with and which subjects they tend not to struggle with? There have been several changes since the early 2000s, including: 1. Foreign languages are now optional at KS4 / GCSE level. 2. The replacement of ICT by computer science. 3. Coursework has been abolished in many subjects. 4. Schools allow students to choose some options in Y9 (rather than Y10) and it's easier to drop arts and technology subjects before Y10.
  6. Mieczysław Weinberg (1919 - 1996), Clarinet Sonata Op.28
  7. Thank you for your kind reply. I hope to retire next year, but the Access to Work scheme would have been helpful.
  8. " … I wonder if there are any advantages in seeking a diagnosis so late in life? … " - I was in my fifties when I got my diagnosis, I have found it useful to get help at work through the "Access to Work" scheme. It made my working life a lot better, it may even have helped me keep my job. I share a lot of the symptoms which you mentioned. I believe that a tendency towards Asperger's syndrome is hereditary, so it might be useful to know if you had it in order to look out for it in your descendants, so that they can get help.
  9. Should Britain use ICD or DSM when it comes to diagnosing and categorising ASD? Over the past 5 or 6 years, the American DSM-5 has almost completely ousted the international ICD-10 in Britain when it comes to ASD, and Asperger Syndrome has been obliterated as a result. The prevailing attitude is that Asperger Syndrome no longer exists as a diagnosis and is now obsolete, but it can still be diagnosed as it exists in ICD-10 which is a current publication. Asperger Syndrome still technically exists as a distinct category in ICD-11 as ASD is categorised as opposed to a continuous one-dimensional spectrum in DSM-5. It's notable that people diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome in Britain and Europe were diagnosed under ICD-10 whereas people diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome in the US were diagnosed under DSM-IV. ICD exists in the US but it's rarely used for psychological and mental health conditions. Should Britain stick with the international ICD or should Britain adopt the American DSM instead when it comes to ASD? DSM has been referred to as the fahrenheit of diagnostic manuals, and DSM-5 as the grey squirrel of diagnostic manuals.
  10. Hello, I am new to the Forum. I joined because I think I probably have Asperger's. I'm in my 60s, and I wonder if there are any advantages in seeking a diagnosis so late in life? Or could there be disadvantages? My "symptoms"/characteristics are as follows: I find it very difficult and uncomfortable to make eye contact. I scored 32 on an online Asperger's test - I think 28-30 was an indicator of Asperger's. I was a very shy, sensitive child. Fortunately, perhaps because of this, my parents sent me to a very small private school, where I was always top of the class. At grammar school I hardly spoke until I reached the Sixth Form. I did reasonably well academically and went to university, but I think I under achieved. I never felt part of it. I have always felt different, but have never known why. I never feel part of groups - it's not really shyness - I just feel different. I would quite like to feel part of a group. I have quite a few acquaintances, but few real friends. I seem to be attracted to more unusual people. I don't feel many people share my interests (which include Baroque music, history of architecture, the Georgian Period, homoeopathy, etc.). I have always had "special interests," which change over the years. As a child I was obsessed with horses and ponies and reading. I now have various interests, which I like to research in depth - for example I won't just knit a jumper, but will research the history of knitting in the British Isles, etc! I accumulate interior design magazines and find it hard to part with them. I like the information in books and magazines. I can't cope with office politics and I can't stand injustice - I get very upset by it. At present I work from home on a freelance basis. I only really have e-mail contact for my work and am much happier with that. I am an anxious person, but have learned to deal with it to a certain extent. As a child, I was terrified of going to the dentist and hairdresser. I am no good at small talk - I don't know what to say. Over the years I have learned what to say to a certain extent, but am not comfortable with it. I have very little spatial awareness. It took me ages to learn to drive. I only like comfortable clothes; however, they can be stylish and comfortable. When they wear out, I like to buy something similar if possible. I am happily married to an equally shy person! I would like to be tidy, with everything in order, but in fact I'm quite untidy. I enjoyed the "hippy" era, because I could identify with it and feel part of something. I still like "alternative" ideas. I am a serious person, but I have a sense of humour ... On the other hand, I am not good at maths (I think I have dyscalculia - I can't seem to read numbers) and I am not interested in technology, although I enjoy connecting with people via Instagram etc. I don't think I am particularly over sensitive to noise, although I can't stand the noise of electric hand dryers in public loos. As a child I was terrified of the Hoover and the noise of steam trains (that shows my age!). My father was a scientist, my son is a scientist and my granddaughter is going to study physics. I think I was put off science and maths at school because I disliked the teacher, who was very boring. Does any of that sound familiar to anyone? Is there any help for people with undiagnosed Asperger's? I would be interested to hear your views.
  11. My name is Julia Font and I am a final year student taking of the MSc Child and Adolescent Psychology at the University of Greenwich. For my final master's project, I am exploring the experiences of parents of children on the autism spectrum during the COVID-19 pandemic. Social distancing restrictions and lockdowns presented families with both unique stressors and unique opportunities. Many families developed new coping strategies and we are interested in hearing your experience of this. The study is being supervised by Dr Charlotte R. Stoner (lecturer in Psychology at the School of Human Sciences) and has been approved by the Research Ethics Committee of the Department of Psychology & Counselling at the University of Greenwich. It is my pleasure to invite you to take part in this research, so that you can share with me your thoughts surrounding this topic. If you are a parent of an autistic child or a child on the autism spectrum, live in England, and would like to take part, please click here. The whole task will take around 10 minutes. Your participation will be completely voluntary and will not involve any payment, as the study is done during 6 months as part of the final project of the master's degree. I would appreciate your participation in my study, as I believe the findings may be useful in designing better parental support and rapid response initiatives to fully respond to parents’ and children’s needs in case another public crisis like the current pandemic takes place. Although I offer no incentive/payment for your participation, your responses will serve as useful resources to better develop future programes aimed at supporting parents. If you decide to take part, you will be asked questions around your daily experiences with your child during the COVID19 pandemic including both positive and negative experiences. Thank you very much!
  12. I'm currently reading Sacred Economics: Money, gift & society in the age of transition by Charles Eisenstein.
  13. Link with more information: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-57045770
  14. World-famous American engineering entrepreneur Elon Musk reveals he has Asperger's: https://www.dw.com/en/elon-musk-reveals-he-has-aspergers-syndrome/a-57473708
  15. I'm having a hard time not being mad, because well, it has been a huge part of my lonely life for what has been years by now. But RE as a franchise, is like, so very stupid by this point. Basically, all the old RE games before RE4, featured zombies. OK, they came back (kind of) for RE5, and they were definitely in Leon's campaign in RE6. But hell - RE6 just totally sucks. But since Capcom built their RE Engine, they've churned out two bad remakes, with a lot of missing (OG) content. Not to mention RE7 was just mediocre at best, and now this. THIS! #NotMyRE If you know the franchise and what the games generally concern, you'll know that vampires and lycanthropes have zilch to do with RE as a whole. And take a look at this doll thing as well. Oh, Capcom.
  16. Also check out this thread: Book prize winner tells how autism helped her succeed
  17. (Not written by me) Greta Thunberg: ‘It just spiralled out of control’ Three years after bursting on to the global stage, what’s next for the most famous climate activist of her generation? Leslie Hook March 31 2021 Greta Thunberg turned 18 a few months ago but occasionally she forgets that. “I actually can vote now,” she grins. But the words “we children” still sometimes slip into her sentences, out of habit. She is sanguine about the change, but it is a bigger shift than she lets on: that phrase has been a core part of her message. Thunberg became the world’s most celebrated climate activist on the back of this idea: that children have to wake the world up to the reality of climate change. She was just 15 when she started the “school strike for climate”, for which she skipped classes and sat outside the Swedish parliament — at first alone and later with dozens, then hundreds of others every Friday. As the movement grew, aided by Thunberg’s speeches, millions of students joined in. She took a year off school, led protests all over the world and has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize three times. But today, the world is very different. When we speak in mid-March, most of Europe is under some form of lockdown. Thunberg is at her family home in Stockholm — her dad’s exercise bike and some houseplants form the backdrop of our Zoom call. She’s also back at school, and isn’t cutting classes on Fridays any more: protests during the pandemic have been mostly virtual. Searching for an upside to the current situation, I ask whether she sees any silver linings from the crisis, which caused global emissions to drop by 6 per cent last year. “The corona pandemic brought nothing positive,” she says bluntly. “The emissions reductions we could see were temporary and accidental . . . They didn’t occur due to us actually trying to reduce emissions. So this has got nothing to do with climate action.” But the pandemic does contain a lesson, she says: “It proves that the climate crisis has never once been treated as a crisis. It just puts it in a different light.” Thunberg became the face of the climate movement when it was enjoying a great deal of success. In the past two years, dozens of countries have announced targets of “net zero” emissions by 2050, which would mean virtually stripping fossil fuels from their economies. China and the US, the world’s two largest emitters, have both made climate change a diplomatic priority. Many of the world’s dirtiest companies have pledged to cut emissions. And images of thousands of children marching through streets in protests inspired by Thunberg have galvanised a political focus on climate change that would have been unimaginable a few years ago. "We need to stop focusing on dates and numbers and acknowledge that we need to reduce our emissions right now" “The Greta Effect” has become a phenomenon with a life of its own. It has also become the subject of study and debate, not all uncritical, by activists, academics and executives. They are asking how much of Thunberg’s impact is personal and how much is due to timing; where she goes next; and how long-lasting, in slow-changing economies and industries, her impact will prove to be. And these are questions that Thunberg is also asking herself. Why does she think she became famous? “I don’t know,” she says. “I guess it was just the right thing at the right timing . . . People were ready for this kind of thing, and then it just sort of [took] off. And one thing led to another and, yeah, it just ­spiralled out of control . . . or at least, out of what was reasonable.” The last time we met was two years ago, when we had lunch together in Stockholm. Although Thunberg is outwardly similar, over the course of our conversation it becomes clear how much she has grown up. She is much more confident and relaxed, and gives long and complicated answers when it comes to her favourite topics, such as the pitfalls of net-zero targets. She still struggles a bit to make small talk, common among people who have Asperger syndrome, a form of autism. What is it like being back at school? Very different from before, she says. What does she think of the recent climate targets set by major economies? “[My views are] completely irrelevant . . . We shouldn’t be focusing on whether individuals think it is enough or whether I think it is good.” But after a slightly prickly start we settle in. Thunberg begins to work on some embroidery as she talks — a piece she has designed for a friend who is a climate activist in the Netherlands. “I can do these things during online classes,” she explains, as a red thread slides across the video screen. “I concentrate better when I do something at the same time.” I ask how her message has evolved in the past few years. Thunberg has long avoided detailed discussion of what the solutions for climate change might be — she insists that is for other people to figure out. But is it time to start thinking more about the solutions now? “If I would start talking about, like, taxes, or things like that, since I have such a big reach, that would send a signal that the climate crisis is an issue that can come down to party politics. And that really minimises this crisis,” she says. “We need to stop focusing on dates and numbers and actually accept and acknowledge the fact that we need to reduce our emissions right now. We can talk about 2030 or 2040 as much as we want. But it is what we are doing now that really matters.” The Paris agreement of December 2015 prompted countries to gradually set more ambitious targets, and the rise of social media meant that a new type of protest movement could spread among a younger generation. But there was also something special about Thunberg herself. In one of her most famous moments on stage, she addressed the UN Climate Action Summit in New York in September 2019. “How dare you?” she asked the audience of assembled grandees, with what looked like tears of rage in her eyes. “You have stolen my dreams and my childhood with your empty words.” Thunberg’s speech went viral, dominating headlines about the summit. Did she really feel that angry or was she putting on a bit of a show? “Well, I mean — both,” she says. “I knew that this was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, so I better make the most out of it. So I allowed myself to let the emotions take over.” She seems bemused, though, that the popular image of her as an angry teenager has persisted. “I never get angry,” she says with a small chuckle. “If you ask anyone who is in my close environment, they would probably laugh at that statement.” Online, Thunberg’s wry humour comes through in her tweets, and she has taken down her critics, including former US president Donald Trump, who accused her of having an “anger management problem” in 2019 and told her to go and see a film to relax. After the US election she turned his own words against him: “Donald must work on his Anger Management problem, then go to a good old fashioned movie with a friend! Chill Donald, chill!” Her sense of humour seems to be thriving under lockdown. Other young activists inspired by Thunberg say that her voice was one they identified with. “What she did was just monumental, it really kickstarted the youth movement,” says Dominique Palmer, a British student and climate justice activist who joined the Fridays for Future demonstrations. “In the speeches that she gives, she says everything very clear-cut and exactly like it is. That was very refreshing for a lot of people.” The effect that Thunberg has on her audience is one of the things that is unique about her, according to a study published this year in the Journal of Applied Social Psychology. “There are a lot of people who think she has done nothing,” says Anandita Sabherwal, lead author of the paper, "The Greta Thunberg Effect", and a doctoral student at the London School of Economics. “Our research shows that is not true, that she has changed [people’s] mindset.” Sabherwal’s paper found that people who had heard of Thunberg were likely to feel a stronger sense of “collective efficacy”, the belief that they could make a difference by acting together. The sample size was small — about 1,300 US adults — but Sabherwal thinks the effect may be even more pronounced in young people, who were not included in the survey. The surge of youth activism has already had some real-world impacts, including court cases over climate change brought by children. A recent legal challenge in Australia seeks to stop fossil-fuel extraction in the country on the grounds that the government is violating its “duty of care” to protect young people from climate change. (A similar case in the US was dismissed last year.) In the corporate world, too, Thunberg’s name has been ubiquitous. “A year ago, I could not have gone into a boardroom without someone referring to her, to Greta specifically, or to the movement,” says Peter Bakker, president of the World Business Council for Sustainable Development. “Greta and her movement have played an incredibly important role in raising awareness.” A search through transcripts of corporate presentations shows that Thunberg’s name pops up in unlikely places. The chief executive of Deutsche Börse, the German stock exchange group, cited her when introducing its work on sustainable finance. The head of a large uranium mining company pointed to Thunberg when giving his prognosis for the future of the nuclear industry. A tractor manufacturer referred to her as it outlined its plans for low-emissions farm vehicles. The list goes on. “She is a presence — sometimes explicit, always implicit — in the debates that are taking place, about the societal concern over climate change and the need for companies to be seen as good actors,” says Mark Lewis, chief sustainability strategist at BNP Paribas Asset Management. Some think Thunberg gets a bit too much credit. Mike Hulme, a professor of human geography at Cambridge university, likens Thunberg to the polar bear as the latest climate icon. “Fifteen years ago, wherever you looked, the polar bear popped up . . . And for a period, wherever you looked, Greta Thunberg seemed to be on stage.” But Kingsmill Bond, energy strategist at Carbon Tracker, a climate change think-tank, says: “The big thing that is different now to any other time in the last 50 years, in attempts to take climate more seriously, is that the economics now work. And that is the big shift that has happened. So instead of pushing water uphill, we are now pushing water downhill.” In many parts of the world, renewable energy is now cheaper than its fossil fuel equivalent. The cost of solar panels has fallen more than 80 per cent over the past decade, while the cost of batteries is one-seventh of what it was 10 years ago. The affordability of renewable energy has in turn prompted many governments to promise to cut their emissions; by one count, around two-thirds of the global economy is covered by some form of zero emissions pledge. “She seized the moment,” Bond says. “It could have taken a very long time. You could say the same about any leader — that change would have happened regardless — but you do actually need people to do it.” Thunberg doesn’t expect her fame to last. “I’m surprised that it has stayed so long,” she says. “I’ve not really still grasped it, in a way . . . You have to keep yourself distant from these kinds of things, you can’t let this occupy your personal life. Because when all this focus [on me] disappears, which it will very soon . . . then that could be a hard thing to handle.” One thing she is grateful for is that she can still go about her daily life in Stockholm undisturbed. “I’m very lucky in Sweden, we have this thing called Jantelagen . . . no one comes up to you,” she says. “If I go to another country, even if it’s just Denmark or Norway . . . then I can’t walk down the street without people stopping me. But here in Sweden no one even looks at me. I can see in their eyes that they know it’s me, and that they recognise me, but they don’t stop me. Which is quite nice, actually.” She is unsure what the next steps will be for the climate youth movement. “We have learnt during this last year that nothing can be taken for granted, that we can’t plan things in advance.” Even though she is not a child any longer, she says her primary tool has not changed — using the moral high ground to ask the adults to do the right thing. “People say that we shouldn’t be using morals, or like, shaming people, or using guilt or whatever. But since we don’t have any globally binding agreements, that’s all we have . . . It’s the only resource we have available at hand.” In many ways Thunberg’s platform shows the great power that protest can have — but also its limitations. Making demands can go a long way. But the child activists will grow up. And the next steps in the climate movement are likely to fall to scientists, policymakers or engineers. With the UN climate summit, COP26, coming up later this year in Glasgow, I ask if she thinks it can make a difference. Thunberg has attended several recent climate summits, first as a little-known activist in Katowice, Poland, in 2018, and the following year as a celebrity in Madrid and New York. She says she will probably go to Glasgow, “if it doesn’t get cancelled again, and if I get invited”. But she thinks the previous summits all failed — and Glasgow won’t be any different. “We can hold these conferences and meetings for eternity, over and over again, as many as we want. That still won’t lead to any change. Unless we . . . actually start acknowledging this crisis and admit that we have failed thus far.” Her dogs, Roxy and Moses, are barking at the door, and her embroidery has paused. I ask if she knows what is next and whether she thinks she’ll keep working in the field of climate change. “Unfortunately, yes,” she tells me. “The wish would be that everything would just be all right. And that there wouldn’t be a need for climate activists. But to be realistic, that’s probably not going to be the case . . . One thing is for sure, we are still going to do everything we can, based on the circumstances. And continue to communicate the science, and to be a pain in the ass for people in power,” she says with a little laugh. Leslie Hook is the FT’s environment and clean energy correspondent Source: Financial Times
  18. Hi there, my name is Jade and I am a Child Development Masters student at University College London. For my dissertation project I am investigating the usage of Melatonin in order to treat sleep disorders/problems in children with an Autism Spectrum Condition. The study will be recruiting parents who have a child diagnosed with ASD, who also use melatonin to treat their sleep disorder. The study will be carried out via online focus groups where I aim to gain understanding of your personal experiences of using melatonin, such as how efficient you've found it and how you were guided to use it. If you are interested and would like to take part please email me (jadehorsnell@hotmail.com) and I can send you some more information about what the study entails. Thank you in advance and best wishes. Jade.
  19. Interestingly, the Israeli army has a specialist autistic unit: The Israeli Army's Roim Rachok Program Is Bigger Than the Military
  20. Camilla Pang is on Radio 3's Private Passions next month. Diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder at the age of eight, Camilla Pang struggled to understand the world around her; in fact, she asked her mother if there was an instruction manual for humans that could help. Twenty years on – after taking her PhD in biochemistry and embarking on a career as a scientist – Camilla has herself has written that manual. She’s called it “Explaining Humans” and it won the Royal Society Prize in 2020 for the best science book . A highly original blend of scientific theory and personal memoir, it gives a real insight into what it’s like to live with autism. In a fascinating conversation with Michael Berkeley, Camilla Pang talks about how she’s learned to thrive in a world which can seem very overwhelming. One of the issues for her is the sensory overload that people with autism spectrum disorder can experience. She’s very sensitive to certain sounds, and the morning commute to work can jangle her senses to such an extent that it takes much of the morning to recover. Music, on the other hand, restores mental calm. Camilla sings and plays the piano; although she has never learned to read music, she can “catch” a tune after hearing it only once. She did this first as a very young child, hearing her mother’s favourite Michael Nyman track and reproducing it straight away on her toy xylophone. Camilla shares the music that has sustained her over the years; we hear Hubert Parry’s great coronation anthem “I was glad”; Michael Nyman’s music for The Piano; William Byrd’s “Ave Verum Corpus”; Debussy’s “Clair de Lune”, and Teardrop by Massive Attack. On BBC Radio 3 at 12:00 BST on Sunday 2 May, and thereafter available to listen again on BBC Sounds.
  21. I would like to invite all parents to give your insights on how do you cope with daily situations during lockdown. If you have a child on the autism spectrum, please consider completing this survey as part of my MSc project to help understand which coping strategies are more helpful for you and your child. I will be happy to share the final results with you, if you would like it. The survey takes place on the online platform Qualtrics and your participation is free, voluntary and anonymous. The project is being supervised by Dr. Charlotte R. Stoner and has been approved by the Ethics Committee of the University of Greenwich. Your participation will be very appreciated as it will be usedful to build evidence on how to deliver a better support to parents of children with autism in case another pandemic takes place. You can complete the survey here: https://greenwichuniversity.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_cC8fin0EPkhIfR4 Thank you very much and, if you have further questions or concerns, feel free to send me a message!
  22. Apparently, Naughty Dog wants to remake it too. I hope Naughty Dog isn't becoming like Capcom. As for Silent Hill. Well, stay tuned for E3.
  23. Hi parents!! My name is Julia and I'm a psychologist at the University of Greenwich (London). How are you? and how are you coping with this lockdown? I know restrictions might have affected some of you and that is why I would like to invite you all to take part in my study. I would consider your personal experiences regarding which coping strategies did you use when dealing with stressful situations. If you are a parent of a child on the autistic spectrum living in the UK and would like to contribute to this short research, please feel free to participate by accessing this survey link. It will only take up to 12 minutes to complete! https://greenwichuniversity.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_cC8fin0EPkhIfR4 Your help will contribute to this field by providing evidence to better design parental coping strategies which professionals can use in case a similar pandemic takes place. If you have any comments or questions about the study, please feel free to contact me (the researcher) at jf2248j@greenwich.ac.uk.
  24. Hi there, deep down I hope that nobody ever reads this, it's mostly just a bit of self therapy. About a month ago I met a girl (very stressful but exciting) and quickly developed an extremely intimate emotional and physical bond. We were both extremely attracted to each other she liked my strange personality, unique views and behaviours, deep and contemplative demeanour, I like her because she is smart independent and successful and we have great craic together, we each have 1 kid divorced, house and career and in a lot of ways very well suited and a strong physical attraction, so all good. Early on I had told her about my aspergers situation, and tried to explain the problems that it had caused me in previous relationships etc and the issues which I need to circumnavigate to function, which obviously she listened and tried to understand, but I knew that it's all good in theory however a different story when the rubber hits the road, So anyway, long story short, 5 weeks later we had hit our first speed wobble, in a nutshell I was trying to look up something on the internet which she had asked me to look up, and then she interrupted me reading to ask me a relatively pointless question on the side, I responded in an agitated way because of the overstimulation, and she freaked out, Quite fair up until this point, but I was not able to respond straight away, and removed myself from the situation and went to have a bath, while in the bath thinking and reflecting about the incident, when she came into the bathroom and asked me "are you alright?" I started to try and explain how I had been overloaded and that this was a normal kind of side-effect of the aspergers and she just rolled her eyes and huffed out the bathroom, When I went back to the bedroom she said to me "I don't believe that is because of your aspergers, because you have never spoken to me in that tone before" at which point my world crumbled, the relationship which we had been building on full trust and openness (the reason she was so attracted to me in the first place) was being thrown back in my face, and I was being accused of using self-victimisation, which is a very strong trait of my personality to not do that at any cost. (I have never claimed a benefit, asked for any special allowances, never even used a disabled bay, I even wear masks to the shop even though I could claim exemption, simply because I don't want to make other shoppers feel uncomfortable) Through the jigs and the reels, when I told her that it had hurt me she kept throwing red herrings into the argument rather than just admit, that it was an unacceptable thing to say. I totally get that my tone may have been off, and I totally get that this would upset somebody, because I have been through similar situations in every single romantic relationship in my life, and I'm totally ready to accept and admit that, but I can not apologise for who I am and how I am. When I tried to explain this she somehow thought that I was just trying to win the argument and kept raising objections, and complained that I did not apologise straight away. When I explained that itself is a very struggle for me that I need some time to process emotional situations, she thought somehow that was also me just trying to win the argument and raised more objections. After seemingly hours of circular debate she took the position that I need to "try harder to understand how something makes her feel" which really hurt me because again to me that means "try harder to not be disabled" which is impossible and would be obviously unreasonable to ask of a guy in a wheelchair, or a blind person. When I told her I could simply not do it, she called me selfish and said that I am just making everything about me. Now I have given her the ultimatum, to accept me as is or simply end the relationship., to which she does not seem to want to do either, but I am willing to give it time, but I can not go through this again as what I have been through with my ex-wife, where somebody is willing to make your life a living hell, to punish you into behaving appropriately. (which is reminiscent of my school days and childhood) (PS: spoiler alert: despite being quite smart I didn't do great at school and also surprise surprise I got bullied atrociously) I really do have a lot of feelings for her, but I'm not going to throw myself under the bus emotionally for her, I have been there done that, and it almost broke me as a person, so I have drawn my line in the sand what else can I say. We have moved on from the incident now however I don't feel that it has been truly resolved, I feel that my request to have some allowance and some time when I cant cope, has simply been viewed as me having an unfair edge in the relationship. This may be due to her own baggage from her own marriage I'm not sure yet, however it's difficult for me to scratch any deeper on the subject because she seems predisposed to fighting every point for fear of ending up on the losing edge of it. I will see how things progress I really like her, however I can not let somebody else use me as a whipping post in a relationship and a scapegoat for their own psychological issues as I have been through that with my ex-wife and it was a horrible experience. If you read this, thanks a lot, it helped me a lot.
  25. Has anyone seen "Drive Me to the End"? It is a dark comedy film (made in 2020) in which a twenty something man is persuaded to give a lift to an autistic young woman who is a distant relative, to a funeral in the North of Scotland ( a two day journey away). I believe the film can be watched free online for subscribers to Amazon Prime at the time that this post was written. Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/3Wb2V_eOJbE
  26. The Many Faces of Science: An Introduction to Scientists, Values and Society by Leslie Stevenson & Henry Byerly
  27. I am currently listening to foo fighters medicine to midnight and kings of Leon new album new offspring album is coming out later this month
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