Hi There,
This is the first time I have written or replied to any posts, but yours mirrors my situation. I have a son who was diagnosed in 2009, (after I was asked by his teacher to take him to a paediatrician as there was something 'not right' about him. He had a major meltdown infront of the Doctor, hitting himself, lining up his toys, rocking, would not look at the doctor, I explained that he has never slept throught he night up on average 5 times, eats specific foods (although we are trying hard to change this), has a very negative self image, (will often just sit and cry for no reason and when asked why he is crying we are told, 'he is sad because he is different'). We received a diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome, and we are also awaiting diagnosis of ADHD and he is on medication for Tourette's although the medication does nothing!
Anyway, I am battling the school, he 'hates school' (his words), we struggle to get him to school (I have taken videos as proof), He has threatened to burn the school down, self harms in class by hitting himself, has threatened to stab 3 pupils (all in the last academic year) and I am told by the school that he 'is fine', I was told last week, 'that if I put my son in a school hall full of children, they would NEVER pick him out as a child with anything wrong with him!' So I am asking myself now, what could have happened between Reception when I was asked to take him somewhere as there was something wrong with him and Yr1 onwards when he became the perfect child in school?
He is no longer invited to parties, as parents have seen him regularly meltdown in the playground after school, which I believe contributes to his self loathing. Due to his increasing agressionand self harmimg we now have a referral to CAMHS, the school were going to refer us, (we never heard anything so I went to my GP), the autisitic advisory service are supposed to have observed him since 2010 in the school, although visits to the school have been made, no visits have been made and no reports produced on my son. He is on School Action Plus, but has no IEP, even for his behaviour, educationally they say he is fine, even though I was called in last year because of his very poor handwritting, (they couldn't read anything he was writing, when asked he said 'holding the pencil hurt'), so I spent many hours this summer helping him despite the meltdowns from being asked to do something he wasn't good at, and I have improved his hand writing. He only does homework if he wants to, maths is usually OK but reading, spellings and Literacy are areas that distress him greatly.
The school have asked if he 'puts it on just for me', so I can fully appreciate how you feel, as I feel like I am an inconvenience to them, my parents and close friends understand how bad it has got at home and are concerned for my safety as he gets older, but I feel with no acknowledgement from the school I can't move forward. We have been offered no support or help and I am feeling the strain as I am the focus for his meltdowns and also the only person he wants at night, so I am sleep deprived as well.
As for the school I am going to try and get an assessment done on my son, as I believe he needs the protection of a statement, if he issues threats against staff and pupils, refuses to do homework and is once again refusing to go, I believe he needs a ring of protection around him. I know the school will not help me, so I am 'going it alone' and trying to do it independantly, I don't know if I will get any where, but at least I feel like I am trying to do something!!
Good luck, I just wanted you to know you are not alone !!!!
