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About newbie101

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  1. Hello, I'm a graduate engineer in the UK, and, having being interested in energy and utilities; working in the oil and gas as an engineer seems like a good idea. Clearly the salary is a factor too but not the driving one. I'm interested to know of how other people with asperger's syndrome have found working in the oil and gas industry have found it. Is it welcoming to people with aspie traits? Are there allowances made for personality differences?
  2. Hi, My post is about gingerism (not really about Asberger's so bear with me) The UK is infamous for gingerism (prejudice against gingers). People assume that ginger men are feminine and are pushovers I myself am slightly ginger, and when I dyed my hair brown/black for a month people's attitudes towards me changed considerably. I was exactly the same person I was before just with a different hair colour. Now because people can't openly insult you in the workplace, I think that gingerism comes in more subtle forms. I myself have not been bullied in the workplace. Is it worth dying my hair brown in the long term to avoid potential problems? There's a reason why men at the top all look the same!
  3. Hello, I posted about using chlorella awhile back and got a few replies. The chlorella I am using is a mercury detox agent and I am hoping that it will remove mercury from my body and in doing do lessen my asberger traits. There is the website listed below http://www.mandimart.co.uk/detoxification-support-41-c.asp That sells detox agents and detox supplements. If someone uses this website could they please let me know the most appropriate mercury detox agent to use? Thanks
  4. Hello, I am moving to Bristol in 2 weeks and am there for around 6 months. I think it would be really good for any Aspie (or aspie) who lives in Bristol to let me know (message back) so that we could meet up. I have never actually met anyone else with Asberger's. Let me know!!
  5. robert7111a My communication problems are not expressing emotion when talking, hard to look someone in the eye for more than a few seconds, and not understanding lingo or office speak. I have gotten around the lingo speak by learning it all before starting a job, and have had to train myself to look people in the eye when talking to them.
  6. I should make several points clearer: I swallow garlic clovers whole and do not chew them, so there is no smell of garlic on me I stated that the MMR jab increases the Asberger traits, not 'causes' Asberger's; the mercury preservative within the MMR is thought to be the cause of increased Asberger traits I am interested and not 'hell bent' in legal action; if there is little chance of winning of course I will not bother
  7. Hello, I am a 23 year old male with Asberger's syndrome and am about to start a graduate job in September. Although my Asberger's is not so severe that it prevents me working it does cause lots of communication problems. I am working on this and have made some success. I did get the MMR jab when I was young and this was when the MMR jab used mercury as a preservative. I know that there is a debated link between MMR and autism, and my Mum and sister do have traits of Asberger's syndrome. My sister and I both had the MMR jab. I took the debated link between the MMR jab and autism as fact, and found that it was mercury that was suspect in causing autism. As a last ditch attempt to 'lessen' my Asberger traits I have been taking chlorella. This is a substance that is used to detox the body and binds with mercury deposited in the body and removes mercury from the body. I have also been eating raw garlic (which has been proven to prevent mercury accumulation, amongst other things). I am aware that it is very unlikely that taking garlic and chlorella will have any effect in lessening the Asberger traits, but I am reaching the limit in how NT I can appear to be. In addition to these supplements I have a low sugar and fat diet (a high fat and high sugar diet has been suggested to increase Asberger traits), and do not have any toxins (pesticides, lead pipes) near me. Toxins have also been suggested to increase Asberger traits. The only other suggested change is a gluten, casein and candida free diet (all three have been suggested to increase Asberger traits), and I would find this very hard to do. I am interested in possible legal action against the company who gave me the MMR jab. To keep this post short: has any Aspie on this forum who has had the mercury preservative MMR jab considered legal action against the company who gave them the jab?
  8. Hello, I got an Asberger's diagnosis in April 2008 and have been managing it since. I am in my final year at university and am due to graduate. in June. My housemate is a serial player (knows how to 'pull' women in nightclubs) and I had previously not had any success with doing that. He recommended that I get the book called 'The Game' by Neil Strauss. This book is a practical and mission based guide that makes you change yourself to become more confident. At the start I thought 'this can never work' and 'this is just not me' but I applied by Asberger's obsessiveness to it and not I have been successful twice and keep in contact with them. This book, as long as you put it into practice, do not take it too literally, and bear in mind that that there are no rules and only guidelines; is very handy. Also this book enables you to be able to strike up conversation with groups of people you have never met before and who you have nothing in common with, so is also very useful for jobs
  9. Best to assess the extend of your Asbergers and then limit your jobs to ones that involve a well structured routine. My argument (nature versus nuture) is that if you constantly place yourself in a dynamic or fluid situation, despite being constantly stressed out (and hating it) you will adapt and learn how to deal with it. Of course this will only work up to a point and this point is set by nature (your brain wiring is different after all). Each person's limit is different, and my argumet for putting oneself through the 'training' to start with is that, despite being unpleasant, it should result in one being able (not liking or preferring to) to do a wider variety of jobs. It would be very easy to put yourself in a shell and say 'right, no surprises or challenges for the rest of my life' but if you do that you are not going to be prepared for the real world.
  10. Hello, As someone with mild Asbergers, even mild Asbergers effectively bars you from certain jobs due to the characteristics of the job. For example most Aspies cannot cope with a changing situation (where a plan is made but often is not stuck to and the environment is very 'fluid'). Because if this jobs in the military, police, any job which does not have a fairly well structured routine are considerably harder for Aspies. Of course, if every possible scenario is rehearsed this can be compensated for, but this is not realistic; and lets face it, would you want to employ someone who's reaction to a change in the plan was less 'diverse' or 'fluid' compared to the others? Having done the RN AIB, that was the main reason I did not pass it, despite several years doing military activities and being in a 'fluid' environment. I had hoped that I would eventually become more diverse and adaptable. However I now know that I am only able to do this up to a point, and not beyond this. Compared to 4 years ago I have improved considerably but because of by Aspie brain wiring adaptability will never be second nature to me, despite my efforts; and as such it is simply not practical to do. I am able to do jobs which require a fair amount of adaptability, as I have been in this environment for sometime, hoewver before I was unable to do that. The point I am making is that, if you want to increase adaptability one way of improving this is to do an activity which requires this. Although I hated (and I cannot emphasise this enough, for an aspie a military environment is constant adaptation and that part of it is living hell!) it certainly pushed my Aspie boundaries.
  11. hello, I have just taken and failed a royal navy AIB, which is officer selection for the UK royal navy (the guys who control the ships and submarines used). Although on a similar training scheme (one that puts academics as its main emphasis) apparently the psychometric shapes section and the planning exercise was where I went wrong. Has anyone had any similar experiences for going for the armed forces?
  12. Hello, Well the reason I am judgemental is a defence mechanism, I can usually see through people quite easily (as I take people as they are) which normally leads to a negative judgement of people. Yes I do not account for the positives however the negatives can hurt you the positives cannot. It's a defence mechanism, and I evolved it after making a mistake with so called 'friends' at comprehensive. It has not let me down since and although I wrongly pidgeon holed a few people (including a perfectly nice by arrogant and vain girl who I disliked purely because she reminded me of a nasty girl at comprehensive) which I realize now was a mistake. The thing is that I can't help it, I am usually right, rarely wrong, just because I only spot the negatives does not mean that the negatives are not there. Again a lot of my problems stem from a rubbish comprehensive experience, no AS help, bullied a lot in the first 3 years, complete isolation for the next 2 years, the isolation part I learned more about people by shutting up and observing. I should have been home schooled
  13. Well I can give an example of awkwardness around women, at work a few weeks ago a new female co worker (had started halfway through my placement) started wearing expensive perfume to work. I did not like it (I am easily distracted by visual things and smells) and I was a bit of an idiot and told her that the perfume stank. She was ok about it (and yes I know that most women would tell me to get lost) and stopped wearing it. Another time was when she dominated a whole conversation about babies and kids (not a favourite topic of mine) I was awkward about the topic. Unfortunately I cope better in the workplace (where there are set rules and guidelines) that at university where it's anything goes in terms of dress, perfume, people, rather like school, except the sharks (people to avoid) are a lot smarter. I used to do a lot of sports and had interactions with people, what happened was that whilst I was at 6th form I got on with my A-levels and ignored all the 'he's a bit weird' and 'he's a little unusual comments' and was able to get by without much social interaction. At University this was not possible (before I knew I had AS) and I pieced together the last 8 years worth of side comments about how I was 'unusual' and it really depressed me. Especially since I hated night clubs, bars, pubs, anything with large congregations of people without a clear aim. It was at that point I quit everything and focused on my degree. That was a low point, I did not know what was wrong with me and I could not fit in properly anywhere. Now, although I do know my weaknesses and limits, I find that they pretty much mean that I can't cope (or can cope just hate) social gatherings of any people unless I know them well. I feign interest (something I have had to get good at which I hate in itself) in conversations and have gotten good at social nuances although I have to focus it will never be natural so I get tired and have to leave early. Unfortunately at university I have learnt that extroverts thrive and introverts never get anywhere (unless they are super smart, rich, model like good looks) with women. Women do not care that you have AS all women care about is how good you are at charming them and if you can make them laugh. That's not prejudice it's largely true. An example of how much I cannot cope with nightclubs was when I went on a night out with my sister and her 'sexually unsure' friend in Manchester, we saw Jack Whitehall walking down the street. We ended up in Crush (not my choosing but my sister's friend was apparently very good at talking to women). I hated it, far too many people and you could not move for the heaving crowd, actual dancing is not possible. It was at that point that I realized that I am pretty much screwed in terms of relationships because: I have tried internet dating and did not like it - women were either really weird, 'stringing you along' or for money only I have tried the bar/night club pulling and cannot do it - no confidence and hate night clubs I have no interest in societies or hobbies as uni work for Masters really has taken over my life So basically I have little hope, and the most frustrating this is that I have been told that I am quite attractive, good voice, etc. so aesthetically fine, but my problem is all in my head, and I just cannot seem to change it. Frankly I wish I was homosexual as I find men a lot easier to talk to than women, and all the homosexual men I have ever met have been really friendly (not like that!), polite, little vain, but on the whole nice people
  14. Atlantis - yes you got my point completely, in Secondary School there were so many peroxide blonde (my term for idiots) women it was hard to see their personalities as their layers of makeup got in the way
  15. Hello, Well it sounds like you had an unpleasant time with relationships. I do not know much about you but I can safely say that aspie men and aspie women understand each other's thought processes more compared to aspie women and NT men. At the moment I am quite busy but am looking for someone. You think that aspies using forums can get to know each other?
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