The diagnosis was wrong. It doesn't matter that you are self aware, most low dependency people on the spectrum are self aware. There are autistim specialists with autism
At the end of the day, if autistim makes sense to you in regards with your experiences, thoughts and behaviour then you probably are on the spectrum. Nobody else can have your experiences, only you. It sounds like both your mum and the Clinton's you visited only see autism in terms of someone with high dependency. The person who said you don't have it because you are self aware or because you are self diagnosed doesn't really know anything about Autism.
Here's some links to online tests
https://www.additudemag.com/screener-autism-spectrum-disorder-symptoms-test-adults/
https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/autism-quiz/
once you do some tests for yourself then get referred for a formal diagnosis . If they say you can't be coz you are self diagnosed or too self aware you can tell them that half the people on the spectrum are self aware and ask them if they realise it is a spectrum
Get a second or third opinion if you need to, but don't except what you know isn't true.
Good luck
Ps it isn't really a disorder, it's Neurotypical people who call it that