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  1. In case anyone doesn’t know there’s an Asperger’s hangout centre in Worcester and from it I’ve made lots of new friends so I hope this helps other Aspies in similar positionsSaturdays are a lot quieter so it’s better for a first time visit compared to Wednesday’s which are usually busierhttps://www.aspie.org.ukThey also have an information app in case you need help deciding https://prospero.digital/library/Zc2rin4KtJ2prvbwT/LKr6zrmCygjHQcXvJHope this helps out anyone who may be interested in coming
  2. Hello everyone, I am currently conducting a dissertation project on; Sex Differences in Loneliness and Friendship Style in Adults with High-Functioning Autism. The aim of my dissertation is to investigate whether males and females with ASD display different friendship styles and experience different levels of loneliness as a result of their biological sex. I am hoping to find individuals who meet the following criteria; Are between 18 to 69 years of age Have a valid diagnosis of ASD Are NOT diagnosed with any other learning/developmental conditions/disabilities If you wish to participate in my study, please follow the link below which will take you to an online questionnaire. The questionnaire will take 10-15 mins to complete and is fully anonymous. https://ulsterhealth.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_3CwklGerhu0adYV My dissertation has been approved by the Ulster University Ethics Committee. If you have any queries regarding my study, please feel free to message me here or via my uni email: mccloskey-b6@ulster.ac.uk You can also contact my dissertation supervisor Dr Stephen Gallagher via email: sm.gallagher@ulster.ac.uk
  3. I have heard this said a lot and I have never quite understood it, or how to accomplish it, or whether I should. People say they have learnt how to trick their mind and fake things in order to suit social interaction. I cannot do that. I do not want to lie to myself. I also wish to find genuine friends. I don’t wish to fake my way through life. That sounds like every time I lie to myself by being someone I’m not causes an emotional spear to jab through my heart. I do not wish to inflict emotional pain on myself if that means I have to fit it and try to fake how I am and the way I act. I have always wanted to find friends that can either understand or learn to understand and accept my difficulties and not become frightened by them. That is what I consider a true friend. In faking my mind and trying to push through by acting positively when I know it isn’t. That sounds wrong and it also sounds like it can cause emotional pain. How would that help me? When I was younger I always searched school to try to find someone genuine. I have come across many bullies, but I do not want to lie to myself. School had stabbed me in the back many times, should I have willingly accepted those stabs to try to fit in. If I have to act fake in the ‘outside world’ and act positively when I know life is not. That would be a plain lie, wouldn’t it? I don’t understand that analogy. To trick my mind, I do not understand this concept. I cannot lie and say that life is a bed of roses, when it isn’t. I have never been a positive thinker because I always want to see the truth. I do not want to lie. I hate lying, both to myself and others. Is this the only way to find friends? It sounds wrong to me.
  4. I used to be really bad at this unless a relative introduced me and the other person took most of the initiative. But as I've got older I find it easier having picked up 'tricks' along the way and would place myself at 6.5 maybe 7 initially. But I still have difficulty especially when it comes to developing the relationship to something more meaningful. Most other people I know off line find this next step much easier and will end up talking about things at a rate that I can't reciprocate meaningfully at and end up losing interest and doing something else. I can develop friendships beyond this particularly if I know the person through a club and I've known them for a long time but critically I wouldn't say they become closer necessarily - just that I know them better. Others develop friends but I tend to develop 'acquaintences' apparently with an inability to advance the relationship like others who club together and maybe go for a drink or go for lunch. Does anyone else have difficulty advancing intimacy in a relationship? It has taken me a lot of self-reflection to realise that I do have problems in this area and they are still ongoing even when I employ tricks I've learned along the way. To this day I worry I will never find love because I don't think I can reciprocate at that kind of level. Where others go out and cheer one another up over a good pint I very rarely do this as I find it hard to move to that level of socialisation which also means I'm not meeting my needs for social bonding and intimacy and am finding this is having a negative effect in other areas of my life where it is stifling my development somewhat. So I'm just wondering if anyone else has problems like this?
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