Stephanie Report post Posted October 10, 2006 I know children with ASD's are prone to being bullied. My son isn't being bullied at present but I wondered what is the best stance to take ... is it better to tell your kid that if he gets hit, hit the bully back and not to just take it .... or is it better to say don't hit them back, tell a Teacher etc .. (and be a victim??) My parents always had the "hit them back twice as hard rule" whereas I haven't really adopted that approach with my kids. Anyone had experience? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paula Report post Posted October 10, 2006 I tell my Nt daughter to always boot the ###### back.Take no ###### form them.Shes not allowed to start agro but if someone hits or name calls then i say go back twice has hard.They move on to a softer target then. But my Aspie son is a different kettle of fish.I tell him to tell the teacher not get into agro.Luckily he attends a special school all are in the same aspie boat so bullying although it exsists is small.The teachers always sort it out.Its brill. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canopus Report post Posted October 10, 2006 I tell my Nt daughter to always boot the ###### back.Take no ###### form them.Shes not allowed to start agro but if someone hits or name calls then i say go back twice has hard.They move on to a softer target then. What happens if the bully gets injured and the police are called in and the parents want to prosecute? Do you want your daughter to be declared guilty by a judge in court? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
barefoot wend Report post Posted October 10, 2006 It's a really difficult one but I would go and speak to the school first. At least then they are aware of the situation and if the problem escalates they are at least forewarned. Some schools are very good - some aren't. Certainly keep a diary of events so that you can back up your claims with specific examples. If the problem persists take it to the head and governors - and put it all in writing. Barefoot Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Suze Report post Posted October 11, 2006 Hi steph,I would,nt tell him to hit back , it could lead to loads of problems.You,ll probably find the bully is more savvy and your son would be blamed..............it happened with my boy.Bullies are clever kids, get him to tell someone he trusts such as a teacher.It might help your son to have an older more responsible pupil to look out for him at break times.............year 5/6 girls are good at this,.If they are asked just to be a buddy he can go and tell them if someone is being unkind, and they can tell a teacher if they see other kids teasing and being unkind to him.As he may not even realise if he is being teased or bullied.This type of stratergy has worked well for a friend with a younger child. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loulou Report post Posted October 11, 2006 Hi, I TOTALLY agree with Suze. Bullies are smart and unfortunately our kids are often naive. I had a huge problem with Kai when he was in mainstream. The bullies would pick on him because he was an easy target. If they hit or pushed him, he would retaliate and hit/push them much harder. He never ever cried when he was hurt by another child, but the bullies always ran to the teacher crying. Consequently Kai always ended up in trouble and was labelled as an "aggressive child" . Even some of the parents complained about him to the school, when it was their little "darlings" starting the trouble. It's so unfair on our kids. Suze's idea of a buddy sounds great, definately worth a try. Loulou xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
claire33 Report post Posted November 11, 2006 I have been to my sons school a few times he has adhd poss AS and all they say is they will keep an eye on him. Oh and if k doesnt tell them how are they meant to know. Sorry but k doesnt tell anyone anything he is not the best at starting a conversation, maybe they should spend more time in the playgroung watching the kids instead of sitting in the staff room drinking coffee!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Canopus Report post Posted November 12, 2006 Sorry but k doesnt tell anyone anything he is not the best at starting a conversation, maybe they should spend more time in the playgroung watching the kids instead of sitting in the staff room drinking coffee!!!!!!! Didn't you know this is the whole point of kicking kids out into the playground at breaktime? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
