Stephanie

Just to add about the criticisms of Tom's Mum ... we all do our best, I am sure she is doing hers, we only got to see half an hour of his life and she had seen 16 years and I am sure she has had a hard slog at it like we all have. It's a mothers job to protect her children, I am sure that is all she was doing. Surprised no one mentioned about him drinking at 15 .. that is the only thing I would criticise!

Loved it and hated it all at the same time - could see my son in all 3 of them, was a glimpse into our futures, and we both thought "hmmm daunting". Tom, Olly and Alex were all great ... and there was a lot of humour in the programme. Did you notice that they used the words "weird" and "for some reason" a lot - my son always says them too .. and we found that weird for some reason (lol!) It raised a lot of awareness and got some good information in ... but I would have liked the programme to have been on for longer, it made me want to ask a lot of questions at the end of it. Stephanie x

I am having a busy day posting on here today - I don't visit very often but when I do, I go for it Bike riding - my son still can't do it and he's 7. They are having a cycling course at school today and he is reluctantly sitting out as he still has stabilisers on his bike. Can I just add that other NT kids in his class can't ride one yet either so I might be over-reacting. He just has never seemed to be that bothered with riding his bike (until now, when he realises most kids in his class can ride one). He doesn't get "why" he's riding it, and when we suggest he goes out on it around the block etc, he sees it as a chore. I have put his inability to ride a bike down to the fact that he walks on his toes, and his hamstrings are tight, that his co-ordination is poor and his balance is not great. I didn't learn to ride one until I was 7 or so, but I was more committed to learning than he is. (He has learned to swim this year which I'm dead chuffed about!) Has anyone got any tips ...... Does anyone have a child who walks on his toes that can pedal a bike easily ..... Are there any specific bikes that are more suitable to kids with difficulties .... My 3 year old (NT) is not great at pedalling either and he also walks slightly on his toes ... hence why I was wondering if it was relative to toe walking. Thanks,

Having just nearly lost our youngest ... he has been very sick in hospital the past few weeks with pneumonia and various associated problems (he's on the mend!), it highlighted to me the lack of empathy shown by our 7 year old son with High Functioning Autism. Basically he missed his brother but didn't feel sorry for him or anything ... he was more concerned with when I was going to be home to pack his lunchbox properly rather than show concern for his brothers illness. He loves his brother to bits (always talking about him etc and showing him off to the kids at school etc, saying how cute he looks in certain clothes blah blah) Also his lack of sympathy was highlighted in his school report. He knows how he should feel, why people might be sad at certain things but he can't express any empathy of his own - he isn't nonchalant or anything, he just seems to not know how to react properly. If I said "Jenny's cat's died" he would say "oh, that's sad" but wouldn't feel sad like I would. He loves us - his parents and his brother quite openly and I know he has feelings of love for us, but with other people/animals he just doesn't have it. He seems to have a lot of empathy for himself ... he is aware of his own feelings (can't always express them), but not other peoples. How does this move forward in time, is empathy something you can kind of learn, how do autistic adults cope with it and how do they actually "feel". I get him books from the library on feelings and emotions ... is there anything else I could get?? Any book recommendations? Any feedback appreciated.

I posted on here a couple of months back about my son toe walking and I was looking into prism lenses and getting his eyes checked. My son is 7 with HFA and does really well, his sensory problems are becoming less of an issue but he still has problems with walking (walks without heel striking), co-ordination (riding a bike/ball skills/bumps into people accidentally and is generally a bit clumsy. Am I clutching at straws to think Behavioural Optometry might help?? I have been looking into getting his eyes checked out by a specialist Optomotrist, I phoned one yesterday to ask about the service they provide, and basically you get a full functional eye test for �185.00 + the cost of any glasses etc. (Here was me thinking it would be free because he's a child!!) Also, it was 50 miles away from where we live. Obviously I am willing to pay it to get him checked if necessary but I wondered if there was anyway we could get this done on the NHS - or even cheaper!!! I would love to hear anyones experiences with similar. Thanks, Stephanie

With regards to the reading part, sounds like hyperlexia. I would suggest you start there then look into autism taking on board all the other trauma issues.

My son didn't have any sense of smell at all until he was five. Now at 7 his sense of smell is totally the opposite, he can smell things no one else can ....... it is far more heightened than your average person. Some smells really bother him. This is great until someone smelly gets in a lift ... and he starts saying rather loudly "ewwww what's that smell, is it that man - he stinks!" or at Play Centres where he has to go and identify which child it is that needs a fresh nappy and loudly tells the parents "this baby needs it's butt changing!"

.... and after watching the mens one last night, I am glad to be a woman!!! Put me right off my dinner - yes ... it was meat and two veg! Bit of an eye opener those programmes - but very informative and I'm sure they encourage a lot of people to see a Doctor and get themselves fixed.

How about a swim nappy and then just regular swim shorts with the inner net kind of thing?? Or even some tight fitting trunks/rubber pants as a layer between the two - just to bide some extra time to get him out of the pool. How about one of those all in one sun/swim suit type things?

Hi my son is 7 and high functioning. I would like him to join a group/club to give him a new interest and occupy his time (at this point he is not keen but once he starts I know he would like it!). He is very structured and disciplined, not so hot on athletic stuff but he is very intelligent and logical. He has friends at school etc and is able to make friends easily (although I don't know what they think of him! lol). He follows instructions really well, is well behaved and motivated. He would look cute in a uniform! Any advice on:- What groups allow kids with ASD's? Do you have to tell them your child has special needs? What kind of groups would be suitable. Things he might like/might not like. I don't know anything about scouts/cubs etc but I thought something like that would be good for him. If anyone has any experience or advice, I would really appreciate it. Thanks,

Ditto to the above!!! My son is 7, we have just come back from Florida and thank god for the Nintendo DS we bought him a couple of weeks before, he sat there for 10 hours on the plane without moaning, moving or getting bored. My sister said to me "you should get rid of that DS, he's obsessed" but in all honesty it is a godsend. He can keep himself occupied by rotating around doing the same things - time on his PC, his Nintendo DS, his Tamagotchis, watching Tom & Jerry, Drawing. If he's not doing these things he doesn't know what to do with himself and generally gets noisy and starts swinging his 3 year old brother around. I have to suggest some things for him to do like lego or just open up a toybox and find a few things he might have forgotten about. He doesn't watch much TV or do anything else to "chill" or occupy his time. Drives me mad though when he's bored!!! I think this is generic to most kids whether they are on the spectrum or not though.

I just typed up a whole reply to this then retracted it as I didn't want to hurt anyone who has more than one child on the spectrums feelings. I will contact you personally.

My son still rides a bike with stabilisers at 7, he's not interested in learning to ride a bike as he doesn't see the point. My other son who is 3 and NT has trouble pedalling. I wondered if it was related to the fact that they both walk on their toes and have very short ham strings? I think perserverance and patience are needed. As for shoe laces, he doesn't usually wear them but I am just teaching him how to do it.