llisa32 Report post Posted August 7, 2007 Okay..Paperclips!...and as your theme for tonight is 'mentor' I'll stay with it cos assume it's helping <'> 1. Anti-breathing device for mentor - just clip on end of nose and forget to say 'BREATHE through mouth' 2. Get coloured ones to give to mentor as a 'lovely pair of earings that will match everything' - honest! 3. Secretly wear loads of them about your person - plant a magnet on mentor and wait for the attack 4. Use them with a make shift slingshot and they turn into mini pellets (must use the HUGE ones though for greatest effect Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted August 7, 2007 :clap: :clap: :lol: Excellent - thankyou. It's more about not being able to think about much other than mentor so I may as well put my time to good use and have things to think about in the meeting so I burst in to odd fits of giggles and really freak her out tomorrow. Anything to avoid giving her the satisfaction of making me cry. You do realise I am now going to have to hold the sheets of her letter together with several coloured paperclips!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted August 7, 2007 5. poking devise - tell her I'm practicing for all my friends on Facebook 6. kebab skewer to slowly roast mentor 7. unfloating boat for mentor 8. probe for electric shock therapy on mentor 9. "accio paperclips" - well if it works it should temporarily confuse mentor 10. use am jamming rod to place sock deeper in mentor's mouth Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
llisa32 Report post Posted August 7, 2007 11. Get two HUGE ones, tell her they are ski's and plonk her on a red run somewhere 12. Give her a whole box as a gift - to keep her future 'minutes' tidy! 13. Use a couple to tie a white flag on a stick..give to mentor and tell her she'd better surrender! 14. Retype her CV in invisible ink (nothing worth seeing), hold it together with paper clips and present 15. Attach a whole box of coloured ones together to make a 'lovely necklace' that she must wear else you will be really really offended Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smiley Report post Posted August 7, 2007 Mumble <'> You know when you laugh so much your jaw begins to hurt.......?? I LOVE the 101 uses for an odd sock. Haven't laughed so much in weeks I feel a theme coming along here - can i just swap 'mentor' for 'lea tw*t' or 'housing tw*t' or 'consultant-man tw*t' or, or, or............. Very theraputic! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted August 7, 2007 I feel a theme coming along here - can i just swap 'mentor' for 'lea tw*t' or 'housing tw*t' or 'consultant-man tw*t' or, or, or............. Very theraputic! Absolutely - insert any necessary person in place of mentor. It's just my current version of 'safe' stress relief at present Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted August 8, 2007 16. Alternative to match sticks to keep eyes open tomorrow for mentoring meeting 17. Fold into eye shapes and glue over closed eyes - maybe then she'll get her 'eye contact' Should go to bed before I get too bitter and twisted . . . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mumble Report post Posted August 14, 2007 Well I've got over my 'mentor torture' phase, so no more evil uses for the paperclip However, I'm not done yet. In honour of Pearl and Baggy (and to give me a laugh tonight as I'm about to peal myself away from this forum for today so I actually get some work done ): 101 uses for JD Enjoy!!!! :lol: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bagpuss Report post Posted August 14, 2007 I can't think of anything clean, and I have my virtual halo to think of.........can I PM all 101 answers? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Lya of the Nox Report post Posted August 14, 2007 1. eye candy 2. eye candy 3. eye candy does this show i am sad, or tired Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted August 14, 2007 4. In Jack Sparrow guise, a stand in for Keith Richards when he's been partying too hard. *thinks* I'm with Baggy, most of mine are feelthy too Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites