1-2-1

[welshmum]

Hi everyone,

This is my first post sounds silly but i am rather nervous. Forgive me if this topic been written before. I was told my daughter got asd but not been diag. She attend's main stream school with a 1-2-1. This might sounds so petty but i feel the 1-2-1 sometimes over step's her role. i was told my daughter needs her 1.2.1 for help during play times and dinner, diagnosed with slight cebral palsey. Also global develop delay.

X got problems with her eating got to be on her terms and everything is repetative e.g smilies with lashings of red sauce. Tried x with lunch box but refused to eat anything, so now trying school dinners. X came home upset because 1-2-1 stopped her eating any bread she even told the dinner ladies no bread for x at any time. To me if x just eats bread she at least ate something. I am also getting notes home saying x needs to practice reading at home or she will be furious with her. This i took offence to because i sit and make x read all the time. x told me that all the other children read to their teacher but she only reads with her 1-2-1. I feel that x is being made to feel different from the other children. I am not sure what the 1-2-1 role is. But when i ask her how x is she tells me the difference about x and her own asd child. She even asked x to keep a secret from the head which i am not happy about.

I am not confrontational in any respect and i am not sure if i do have cause to say anything at parents evening which is this week.

I dont want to speak up if i am being petty.

thank you.

[pearl]

Welcome to the forum welshmum.

 

As a start, you could copy & paste what you have written here into a document & give it to the teacher to read ahead of parents evening, with a view to discussing your concerns. I think you are right to have them, especially the keeping a secret from the head, even if it might have been misinterpreted & be something quite innocent. And the "furious" bit - well that is clearly inappropriate.

 

Do you have a home/school diary so you & the 1-2-1 can communicate with each other, or can you email each other regularly? That way problems can be dealt with & misunderstandings avoided before they become major, like the bread thing for instance.

 

Is your daughter statemented? Is the 1-2-1's role set out in the statement or the IEP? If so, is she diverging from what is expected of her?

 

Just a few ideas - I'm sure others will be along with more <'>

[Karen A]

Hi Welshmum. Welcome to the forum.We have found a couple of things helpful in improving how the TA works with Ben.The ASD outreach teacher provided whole school training in ASD.We also have a clear and agreed IEP now so that we are in agreement with the support the TA is providing.

It is worth talking to the teacher at parents evening.In my experience it is good to show early that you are interested and concerned otherwise things continue as they are.

There are lots of others here how have experience of negotiating re 1:2:1 so you are not alone.Karen.

[Bard]

As a teacher, I don't think you're being petty at all. There are things beginning to go wrong, so you need to raise the issues and fix them, or understand the reasons behind the actions.

It sounds as if the 1:1 is blurring the role that she has as a parent of an ASD child with her role as an assistant, which is not appropriate. So banning your daughter from eating bread is inappropriate without discussion and input from you. It's not her decision to make, even though she might think she's being helpful.

Being furious if your child doesn't read at home is an unprofessional comment to make, the fact that she wrote it down would indicate to me that she's unaware of how wrong a response it is. She needs to know that as well. It sounds ignorance rather than malice is the issue.

You not only need to know the role of your daughter's support, but you should have a say in what sort of support that she needs or doesn't need as well. The assistant needs clear guidelines, so that she knows her limits and boundaries as well as her responsibilities. How much training does she have?

As for the reading. I have 30 in my class, 5 of whom are supported readers. My TA hears them read daily, so I hear the other 25 as often as I can. At least once a week, sometimes twice. I do keep a check on my 5, but their main ' hearing them read' support is from my TA.

Talk to the teacher, I'd write a list before the meeting so that you don't get flustered or forget something. You certainly have grounds for a proper discussion, and if there's not enough time, I'd book another slot to really work out what you all want and need to be happening in school.

Edited November 12, 2007 by Bard

[Karen A]

Hi welshmum.I read Bards last post re booking another slot.I thought I would mention that if your DD is new to the school or to support the SENCO should have organised a seperate appointment for yourself and other professionals to sort out arrangements for support and plan an IEP and longer term reviews.

If your DD has a Statement then there should be a date set for the Annual Review.If these have not been organised then have a word with the SENCO.

In my experience the slots for parent's evening are too brief to talk in detail and you probably need to have the Senco there too.Karen.

[welshmum]

Wow!! I am so glad i came across this site your all so knowlegable. I hope you all dont mind but i have printed your replies off, you all have good advice. I have never had a meeting with anyone except the teacher. My daughter dont have a statement and never had a meeting where the 1-2-1 attended. Tomorrow is parent evening, and i am so so grateful for your advice. I will let you know how it goes.

 

Thanks

[pearl]

Good luck

Hope it goes well.

[Bard]

We're all in the same boat really, and we tend to pool our experiences and opinions.

And when things go wrong, or right, there are people who understand how important certain things are, and will sympathise or celebrate with you accordingly.

Good luck, don't be shy about asking uncomfortable questions.

[Kathryn]

Welcome to the forum Welshmum.

 

I hope the parents' evening goes OK and you have a chance to voice your concerns. Good luck!

 

K x

[sesley]

I'm concerend with the 1-2-1 encouraging a secret from the head teacher, what secrets is she trying to encourage, and what if the secret is harmful, sorry to sound a bit alarmist, but i went to safe,strong and free talks when he was in Nursery and they said that a child should not have any secrets from parents especially,because secrets might mean hiding something wrong and dangerous.

[Clare63]

Hi Welshmum and a very warm welcome to the forum, I am so glad you found us.

Good luck with the parents evening and please don't let the school fob you off, you know your child better than anyone else.

<'> Clare x x x

Edited November 14, 2007 by Clare63

[Karen A]

<'> I hope it goes well and the teacher is helpful.Karen.