pixie Report post Posted November 21, 2007 My son is being bullied at his special school. It is an Autistic specific school and the bullying has been going on for around 3 years. We have him at home for a few days to chill and he's off to the GP tomorrow so that the stress is recorded in his notes. I'm not sure what we are going to do long term as my son wants to go back to school despite the bullying. He is almost 16 and was planning on moving up into the FE department of the same school. Now we don't know what will happen to him or where he will go. We have a meeting with the head next week so maybe we will have a better idea of a direction to follow then. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pumpkinpie Report post Posted November 21, 2007 You say this has been going on sometime, what has the school done? Have you looked at the school bullying policy? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pixie Report post Posted November 21, 2007 We have little idea what the school has done apart from we know they have spoken to the pupil/s involved. At one time the parents were informed. Every time it gets bad it's reported and appears to be sorted but then it starts up again a few weeks later. It has even come into our home with online bullying from the pupil/s involved. We downloaded the abuse our son received and it was shown to the pupil's parents via the head. The head won't tell us what he does as he says it's confidential how he deals with it. I am not sure if they have an anti bullying policy as we have never been offered any information about it. I might as well put a sticker on my son to invite the bullies as it doesn't seem to matter what we do it just won't stop. I am sick of it all, literally. It is also affecting our health as well as our son's. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted November 22, 2007 Pixie, I really sympathise, we are going through the exact same thing. My lad is in an ASD unit and a lad there is constantly intimidating him and frightening him, to the extent that he is constantly on edge and anxious when he is there and is coming home exhausted. It's been going on for nearly ten months and I've had numerous meetings and exchanged many emails about the problem. Even today, I spoke to the teacher again about how down my lad had been last night after coming home from school. It's got to the point now where I feel they are shrugging their shoulders and telling me that, in an environment like he's in, there are children with challenging behaviours and this lad targets my son more because he over-reacts and it is up to my lad to learn to deal with it better as there is little more they can do about it. I'm at a loss and so is my son, I really feel powerless and I feel the staff are feeling powerless to make to stop too. They insist they take it seriously and are trying to stop it and are on top of this lad, but it's still happening. So sorry, I know that didn't help you, but you're not alone, if that's any consolation at all. Probably not, is it. <'> ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
witsend Report post Posted November 23, 2007 Hi your situation sounds awful <'> to you. My son was bullied at a special school and the staff couldn't deal with it and tried to cover it up - it was a dreadful time and my son was only there 6 months! Eventually he refused to go anymore and we got him moved to a different school. It's really difficult if your son wants to saty there but if he's coming up to 6th form age is there not another school with a 6th form he could go to and make a fresh start. he does not deserve to be treated like this and the school sounds like they are useless to be honest. It sounds like it's been going on so long your son just accepts it as inevitable and that's so unfair and sad. Would it be better to meet with the education authority now not the head and see what their take is on it? Good luck - Luv Witsend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pixie Report post Posted November 23, 2007 (edited) Thank you, it does help to know my son is not alone especially in a special school or unit. The GP has said that our son's symptoms are caused by the stress of the bullying and that we are right to keep him home a few days. It's always a worry with breathing problems and chest pains so we wanted to make sure it was the stress and not his Asthma getting worse. We are all feeling a little less stress now but not looking forward to our son going back to school next week. I hope you manage to get something resolved for your lad and the bullying will stop or at least become manageable if that's the best that can be hoped for given the situation. Edited November 23, 2007 by pixie Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pixie Report post Posted November 23, 2007 Hi your situation sounds awful <'> to you. My son was bullied at a special school and the staff couldn't deal with it and tried to cover it up - it was a dreadful time and my son was only there 6 months! Eventually he refused to go anymore and we got him moved to a different school. It's really difficult if your son wants to saty there but if he's coming up to 6th form age is there not another school with a 6th form he could go to and make a fresh start. he does not deserve to be treated like this and the school sounds like they are useless to be honest. It sounds like it's been going on so long your son just accepts it as inevitable and that's so unfair and sad. Would it be better to meet with the education authority now not the head and see what their take is on it? Good luck - Luv Witsend. The staff have already tried to cover it up but we keep going straight to the head. I don't think the teacher is best pleased about that but I'm not pleased when my son comes home and tells us the staff tell him it must stay "in class". I don't think he will stand to go to another school. He has a friend at the school so it will be too difficult for him to move. The only other option would be a special needs college and as my daughter went there my son most certainly will not be!! They have no understanding of Autism at all. We have now decided that every phone call and every meeting will be recorded and letters of confirmation sent so that all this is then recorded properly and hope it makes a difference. I hope your son is now settled and happy in his new school. xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pixie Report post Posted December 12, 2007 A little update on the bullying situation at my son's school. He has left as he, nor we can take any more. Even the staff are bullying him, including the head and deputy head. It has been a terrible time for him and for us. An animal would have been treated better than he has. I don't know why they all singled my son out but he is not a bad lad, he's HFA. He is the kindest and most thoughtful young person that I know. He would give anyone something to make them feel better and go without himself. He works hard and shows great promise accademically. We don't know why all this has happened but it snowballed so much that there is no way now that it will stop. So he did his last painful day today, thank goodness. We just have to hope now that we are in time for him to have not suffered too much long term damage. When he has rested up a while we will give him all he needs in the way of education and life skills that he needs. We will also start to write our letters of complaint as this school needs to be brought to book. -------------------- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted December 13, 2007 <'> <'> I am really sorry that your son has been let down so badly.I hope you are all able to take a breather and to have a bit of a rest from the stress.If you are home educating for a while or long term there are several others who home ed already.Don't be frightened to ask for moral support or information.Karen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted December 13, 2007 So sorry, Pixie, that it has had to come to this. It's terrible that your lad has suffered and hasn't been protected from this bullying. We often question why we are putting our lad through the stress of school as well and consider taking him out quite regularly. Very best of luck to you all with your home edding, we did it for two years and it generally worked really well for us. Hope you can all find some peace now. <'> ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
witsend Report post Posted December 13, 2007 Sorry you've all been going through so much stress <'> I hope now you've made a decision things will start to get better for all of you - take care Luv Witsend. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
