who to invite

[hev]

this party lark is difficult!!k is 5 next week and i booled her party today but i just hate leaving kids out,she has 40 kids in her class but 20 places at the party,shes wrote a list but i feel bad about the ones not going,i know its a trivial worry but its worying me!!

[gothschild]

I'd just ask the ones she gets along with, its the safest option.

I used to ask a few from school and then would make up the numbers with relatives children, my neighbours daughter and son and a friend or two for my older son.

It does feel uncomfotable missing out some of her classmates but I'm pretty sure it will happen to her occasionally.You could try sending some treats into school to lessen the blow to those not going!

 

gothschild x

[hev]

its happened to her a few times and its really not bothered her,i think its that i remember steves face when everyone got an invite and he didnt,i used to feel gutted for him theres 20 in the class not going so its not as if im singling anyone out not to go i spose

[Mumble]

Awful way to divide I know, but I don't suppose there's equal numbers of boys and girls in the class and she can invite all the girls (or boys )?

 

If you go for a mix, I don't think it'll matter as there's lots being left out, not just one or two - I, like your Steve, was the only one not to be invited to classmates' parties and that hurts, but this is an entirely different situation

 

Or don't invite anyone from school and invite 20 off the forum - I'm sure some of us could pretend to be 5 years old - I practise a lot

 

What sort of party are you having? Will there be a bouncy castle :bounce: and balloons :balloon: and funny hats and food ? If so, I'm gatecrashing

[Enid]

Know what you mean though Hev, its a bit political this party business! We have only a very small school in our town, less they 70 kids in whole school, and its soo easy to upset someone, not the kids but the parents, my youngest just turned 6, I worried myself sick over party. Good luck Enid

[baddad]

You invite the twenty Katie picked

 

Personally, I'd also be inclined to ask her 'who are the kids that NEVER get invited?' and invite them + however many of katies chosing to get it to twenty... I also tend to keep Ben's parties small but with 'big' events, but I guess that's different for an NT kid because they're more likely to have larger numbers of mates rather than just one or two and a classroom full of 'classmates' IYKWIM...

Another way of doing it would be to chose kids she socialises with outside of school and do the invites to their home addresses rather than through school...

hope that helps

[pearl]

It was always the party bags that got to me ....

A party could stand or fall by what was in those *&^% bags!

[bid]

I invite particular friends, then anyone else who has asked my child to their party in the school year.

 

How bad am I though, I haven't got round to doing a partay for littlest DS, who was 7 at the beginning of May!!

 

Boho

[hev]

pearl the bowling alley are supplying the party bags ive gone through list with k and thats whose coming,20 kids at a bowling alley,i must be mad

[bjkmummy]

it was bens party today - he is in a mainstream school with an asd unit attached - he invited all the children that never get invited to parties!! his choice not mine - made an interesting party as lots of children there on the spectrum but all with different needs. the parents all enjoyed the party as it wasnt structured just a bouncy castle and a chance for the kids to be themself. some of the children didnt want to sit at the big table to eat and that was fine - everyone had a fab time - only one person didnt show who said they were coming and that ws a 'normal' child from the road where we live

 

joe has been at his nursery for two years and never been invited to a party - that hurts!!!!!

[pearl]

pearl the bowling alley are supplying the party bags

genius

I once made the mistake of not providing party bags & was roundly told off by one little brat girl!

At the same party I gave everyone mini trifles & they all hated them except one boy who ate everyone elses & then It was the same kid who threw a tantrum every time he lost a game, so we were all quietly pleased about that, well it was at the leisure centre so I didnt have to worry about my carpet

[Kathryn]

Parties are a nightmare and I know what you mean hev, about feeling bad when you can't invite everyone. For my son's 5th birthday party we had booked an activity centre: strictly limited numbers. My son was giving out invitations in the playground before school. One boy came up to me and sweetly asked for his invitation and I had to tell him we hadn't got one for him. I hope I haven't scarred him for life!

 

As for party bags - round here it's obligatory to spend almost as much on the party bags as you would on a present - no getting away with a balloon and a piece of cake!

 

I'm just so pleased that my son is nearly 11 and for the first time, will not be having a party this year.

 

K x

[Tally]

I used to have fairly small parties, just a few friends round for tea. On my 8th birthday, a boy got up, stood at the end of the table, and did a party political broadcast for the Conservative Party. Apparently it was rather good.

[Kathryn]

I used to have fairly small parties, just a few friends round for tea. On my 8th birthday, a boy got up, stood at the end of the table, and did a party political broadcast for the Conservative Party. Apparently it was rather good.

 

 

Where is he now?

 

K x

[pearl]

Maybe he just won Crewe & Nantwich!

[Tally]

 

You know what, I've tried to find where he is now, because it would be interesting to know. Someone with his name has rowed for Birmingham University. We did live in the West Midlands, but then people often travel or university anyway, so I'm not sure if it's the same person.

[baddad]

it was bens party today - he is in a mainstream school with an asd unit attached - he invited all the children that never get invited to parties!! his choice not mine - made an interesting party as lots of children there on the spectrum but all with different needs. the parents all enjoyed the party as it wasnt structured just a bouncy castle and a chance for the kids to be themself. some of the children didnt want to sit at the big table to eat and that was fine - everyone had a fab time - only one person didnt show who said they were coming and that ws a 'normal' child from the road where we live

 

joe has been at his nursery for two years and never been invited to a party - that hurts!!!!!

 

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[David Matthew Baker]

Or don't invite anyone from school and invite 20 off the forum - I'm sure some of us could pretend to be 5 years old - I practise a lot

 

I practiced whilst away on the activity camp at the weekend. We were waiting for a meeting to start one night and one of my group (a 13 year old) picked up some large building blocks and started playing with them. The next thing I knew I'd joined in without thinking about it. The lad made comments about him been 13 and acting like a 3-4 year old. I then told them I was 25 and doing the same. That got some laughs from them. Then one of the other lads spelt out something using the phonetic alphabet to which I replied I couldn't remember most of it which set two of the girls off reciting it for us. When the other of our groups leaders arrived we were reciting the phonetic alphabet. I'd just talked about the type of feedback the toy the lad was currently playing with gave and made comments it was a bit lacking on sound apart from the button that popped up the duck which he then started repeatedly pushing with me joining in. I'm not quite sure what she (the other group leader) thought. Especially as we all then fell into fits of laughter for about 10-15 minutes until she gave up and decided to ask her dad (who happened to be sitting in the room and is a head teacher of a school) to help her (she said it in a really pityful voice and was obviously struggling to control herself (I.E. not start laughing along with the rest of us). We were meant to be coming up with a prayer to start the worship that evening. We did manage it but I had to avoid looking at one of the girls for the rest of the evening because everytime I looked at her she creased up and almost set me off again. It took quite a while for me to regain proper composure. It had been a while since that last happened. The time prior to that was in the middle of a staff briefing at school. One of the other members of staff whispered something to me. I could have killed them. Urgh!!! Still at least we were having fun. There was comments at the leaders meeting later on from the other leader that perhaps her group were getting on too well. I made a comment that I hadn't helped much (in the bit earlier) which she agreed with. Sorry at times I just do click with people and get on with them really well. I partially blame it on us all be a bit over tired though and hence hyper. I did like my group though. Going to try and become a volunteer in the group down at the church. The main reason I stopped going was to do with leaders in the older youth group who were a bit extreme for me in anycase. I still do hold with a lot of the ideals in anycase. (If you want to hear more about my time in the Lakes check out the positive thread. I feel a bit deflated now though. Not got much to do. Having kids around does seem to enthuse me. Though the two youngest ones who for some reason kept gravitating towards me were hard work. (About 3 and 5 I think.) They always wanted to be doing different things and I seemed to be somesort of climbing frame to the older one of the two. Still even playing with them was fun. Just more tiring than the older kids. As I've said in the past upper primary and lower secondary are my prefered age ranges.)