son went missing!!!H

[Enid]

Have just about calmed down, after a lovely day swimming with all kids, ds asked if he could play out with the others on the cul-de-sac, he has being doing this lately as he is going through a good patch, He was in and out and I sat on step with a cuppa and littles were playing in back garden. all was well. Then at 7 he said can I go out for a few minutes with the others,they were still out as a lovely evening, I said ok, and went to take the washing in, Looked out 5 mins later and couldnt see him, I said to the others wheres DS, He went in they said, he hadnt, after 15 mins was frantic, after 30 could hardly breathe, Then drove round the block and found him, up a tiny lane, just sitting there!!!! he said he was just about to go in when 18yr came out and told him off, so he ran away and hid!! He has done this twice before but was much younger and was from school. Even though he wasnt far away, if I hadnt spotted him, I think he would have just stayed there for ages, now I wont be able to trust him again, Oh god the joys of being a Mum! Enid

[pearl]

<'> Glad he turned up safely Enid <'>

[JsMum]

Hi Enid so glad you found him, Its not at all a nice feeling to loose our children, with J He now carries an ID card with his disabilites, and details incase he is lost, J doesnt play out unsupervised and wouldnt be able to play independant because if others choose to leave J somewhere unfamiliar he would freek out and be lost.

 

I am saving up for a GPS tracker as I feel that for even half an hour J would be very vulnerable.

 

So glad he his safe at home, it reavaluates our real love for our kids, especially at times where we probably wish they would just disapear for just five mins, all that goes out the window when you have moments like this.

 

Hugs,

 

JsMum

[Enid]

It scared the life out of me, but I cant really stop him playing out, he just goes if I say no, so I let him and watch, he wanted to hide so a card or tracker would have been no good in these circumstances, I think he wanted me to find him though, but I dont know, he is way too big for me to move so I had to talk quietly and calmly to him to get him to get up and get in the car. so blumming wearing. Enid

[Clare63]

Enid,

 

My goodness what a worry, pleased to hear he's home safely.

 

<'> <'> <'>

 

Clare x x x

[Kathryn]

Oh Enid, that must have been scary.

 

<'>

 

K x

[Suze]

<'> .............would he use a mobile phone with a speed dial on it for phoning you , if he got into a fix again

[Enid]

He smashed 3 during those terrible rages he went through from Jan to April, last one was 18th April, The point is that he was hiding from everyone, me included. Enid

[stressedmumto2]

Hi Enid,

 

I remember situations like that so frequent with my son, only he wouldn't hide from others but from me or he would just wander off wih others. I've now got to the stage where I have given him a list of places he can go but he still wanders further, I have provided him with a mobile that on the agreement if he's out he has to take it with him and he has to answer his phone if I call. He has my no' saved on it and other family members so if he's stressed he can at least call one of us or we can call him. I also set the alarms 10minutes apart so he gets a 1st alarm then a second alarm and he know's he has 10 mins extra to make it home from the 2nd alarm, there are consequences if he doesn't get in at the right time, either no bike the next day or no going out unsupervised.

 

I have found so far it's been working quite well, although I still can't keep track off him and his wandering off is the biggest problem but he is in many ways acting responsibly, his friends all remind him too when his alarm starts going off and also tell him to answer his phone when I am calling. I have tried to make sure that his friends can also be responsible for helping him and slowly it is being drummed in.

 

I wander if giving your son a phone but using the same kind of agreement will work with him, in that if he does get stressed he can be in contact if he wants but also know's that by the time the alarm goes off he has to make it home or the next day he can't play out or whatever consequence you give.

 

Good luck and i'm glad you found him safe <'>