seeking-sanity Report post Posted April 11, 2005 Hi all County told us this morning thay have refused to do an assessment on J. I feel so angry, anyway I phoned ed physc who feels in Js state of mind he should not go back to school and they will look into some home tuition. I feel so let down by the system, Js had dx of dyspraxia and in midst of dx for aspergers hes so down at the moment he wont go out of the house on his own hes nearly 11 and used to be so full of life i just dont know whats happened, anyway I was hoping with more support at school he would get over his fears of leaving us, im not quite sure whether home tuition is right or not , scared he'll become a complete recluse, although very relieved I dont have to send him. Sorry to waffle, one of those days. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oracle Report post Posted April 11, 2005 He will become a recluse if he is pushed too hard and can not cope. My son spent two years hiding in his room after a complete breakdown. Go for the Home Tutor and let him have some space in his head. It will do you good to. If he has some space he may just get his head round himself. My son did eventually and yesterday spent the afternoon in a Pub watching the Newcatle Match with his elder brother and his mate. Hoping they would lose of course - we live in Sunderland. David now has an active social life - on his own terms and it works for not only him but us too. Carole Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
seeking-sanity Report post Posted April 11, 2005 Thanks Carole - you always give me hope! I am really relieved as i think this is just what he needs I just worry long term. Did your son have a massive fear that someone he loves mainly me and his dad are going to die? So wont let me out of his sight! Thanks Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oracle Report post Posted April 11, 2005 My son was just totally unable to function if I was not there (his dad and I are divorced) to interpret for him and fill in the blanks for him. Does that make sense? I suppose it was like he could not speak the language, although he has always been very verbal. He felt totally out of his depth in any situation. I realise now that I had been doing this for years without even realising it. Once David was out for good I decided that I was doing him no favours by letting this continue. So slowly over the last five years I have tried to teach David that he must be able to this this for himself. It's taken five years but his level of confidence in himself is now more than I ever hoped for. And just as importantly, I feel, is the fact that he now understands that somethings will always be difficult for him - but that does not mean he can not do it. We have many discussions now about how he feels about doing things. Before he could not tell you how he was feeling at all. He just clung to me like a life raft. I know that it's not funny but my eldest has always called David a clingon (He's Star Trek fanatic) But he was correct David was a clingon. He's much better now - although I am still his anchor and yes that does still worry me. But one step at a time. Carole Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
