I need advice please

[got the tshirt]

Because Dd3 has never been tested for impaired theory of mind, I asked one of her friends mums who is a SALT if she would test her. Well she did yesterday and it did show that Dd3 is lacking theory of mind. I asked this Salt if there could be any reason other than an ASD that would cause this lack of theory of mind and she said no.

OK heres the problem. I don't know what to do with this information. Should I write to the pead and tell her I have had an independent test, should I tell the school. Should I ask the SALT who saw her before to repeat the test [ which she neglected to do at the asessment]. Should I get the Other SALT to write a report and send it to all involved with a covering letter.

I feel like I should do something with this information because it answers so many questions about Dd3 and the difficulties she is facing everyday.

Hope someone has some advice for me.

[call me jaded]

Could your friend write you a letter saying what she did and what she recommends you do?

[justine1]

Hi

I think it would be best to get the SALT,that you have just seen,to write to all those concerned,it will be easier for you and probably more accepted.Providing it was a formal test/done professionally,not just because your friend knows SALT.My sister in law is a pysio I cant even ask her advice about simple things like exercises for back ache because she will be in breach of her oath,not sure how it works for SALT's though.

[got the tshirt]

Yes i see what you mean, I don't know if she would do this based on what she saw yesterday but she is self employed so I suppose I could ask her to repeat the tests in a more professional environment and maybe offer to pay her for her time. She is not exactly a friend she is the parent of my Dd's friend. That way it would just be an independent assessment. I have to say it was so glaringly obvious that my Dd3 had no idea that I wouldn't know that things had been moved that I think anybdy could have performend the test.

Thanks for the replies.

[Sally44]

Does your daughter not have a diagnosis of an ASD??

Theory of mind if only one part of a much bigger picture.

I agree that if you asked for this same SALT to write something up that you can use that it would be helpful. But there are also so many other skills that are going to be affected due to this or associated skills. If this SALT is experienced in ASDs could she do a full assessment of expressive/receptive speech, narrative, inference, comprehension, sentence formulation, verbal reasoning, phonics, auditory processing and auditory delays, social communication, tone of voice, prosody, semantics, pragmatics etc etc the list is probably much longer than that.

And also test her ability to manipulate information and deliver it in a different way eg. my son was asked to look at some pictures and tell the SALT what was happening. Then the SALT asked my son to tell her in a sentence what was happening using the word 'because'. He could not do it at all. Most of learning depends on being able to understand something and then manipulate that information into a new situation or deliver it in a different way.

For example you might learn all about Heny VIII in school and then be asked to write an essay about how one of his wives might have felt. My son could not do that. He could regurgitate all the information, but not deliver it in a different format to how it had been delivered. That is what most learning demands.

[got the tshirt]

Hi Sally, thanx for your detailed reply. No my daughter doesn't have a diagnosis but has been seen several times by a comunity pead who is experienced in dx ing asd's, she sent Dd3 for a speech and language assessment which was interesting in that it picked up that she has difficulty with emotional language and speaks and answers questions in a very precise manner. among other things. She also could not tell the SALT why things were happening in a picture and can definatley not say why another person feels in a certain way. If you say to her why do you think the boy in the picture is sad, she would just say " How do I know" and look at you as if you have gone mad. She also has loads of other difficulties associated with ASD's such as sensory problems, controlling behaviour, rigid routines etc. The problem is I think, that she is already very skilled at covering up when she doen't understand something, she is very bright and doing well academically at school especially in maths but story writing causes her great distress and she often doesn't want to go to school if she knows she has to write a story. The theory of mind thing has been bothering me for sometime because her inability to see anyone elses point of view is beginning to cause problems and I needed to know if she was being awkward or if she genuinly doesnt understand that everyone thinks differently. Of course her completly not being able to do the theory of mind test has opened up a whole new set of issues for us, even though I kind of knew she wouldn't get it it still came as a shock to see how completly unaware she is. Sorry for a really long post but I can't decide what to do now that I am armed with new information.

I know you guys can't tell me what to do but reading your advice[even to other people] has really helped to get me this far.

One last thing, last time we saw the pead she said she felt Dd3 who is 7 was too young to diagnsoe with aspergers and that she wanted to sit on the fence for another 6 months and see what happens!!

[justine1]

Hi Sally, thanx for your detailed reply. No my daughter doesn't have a diagnosis but has been seen several times by a comunity pead who is experienced in dx ing asd's, she sent Dd3 for a speech and language assessment which was interesting in that it picked up that she has difficulty with emotional language and speaks and answers questions in a very precise manner. among other things. She also could not tell the SALT why things were happening in a picture and can definatley not say why another person feels in a certain way. If you say to her why do you think the boy in the picture is sad, she would just say " How do I know" and look at you as if you have gone mad. She also has loads of other difficulties associated with ASD's such as sensory problems, controlling behaviour, rigid routines etc. The problem is I think, that she is already very skilled at covering up when she doen't understand something, she is very bright and doing well academically at school especially in maths but story writing causes her great distress and she often doesn't want to go to school if she knows she has to write a story. The theory of mind thing has been bothering me for sometime because her inability to see anyone elses point of view is beginning to cause problems and I needed to know if she was being awkward or if she genuinly doesnt understand that everyone thinks differently. Of course her completly not being able to do the theory of mind test has opened up a whole new set of issues for us, even though I kind of knew she wouldn't get it it still came as a shock to see how completly unaware she is. Sorry for a really long post but I can't decide what to do now that I am armed with new information.

I know you guys can't tell me what to do but reading your advice[even to other people] has really helped to get me this far.

One last thing, last time we saw the pead she said she felt Dd3 who is 7 was too young to diagnsoe with aspergers and that she wanted to sit on the fence for another 6 months and see what happens!!

So is the paed seeing her again,if so when?I would say if you not happy with the paed go to the GP and see if you can see another paed,it is possible but may take a while.My son was diagnosed last year and was 6 years 3mths at the time.He probably could have been dx'd at 5 if I had taken him to ther GP the previous year,but I was reluctant as I thought his problems were down to other changes going on at the time.So I dont see the logic in waiting.I have a four year old presenting some problems and can understand why they wouldnt dx him,he is on the waiting list,because many four year olds cant speak 100% or are very active.hOWEVER i THINK 7 is a different story and she can get a dx if she has indeed got AS.

[julie1]

slightly off topic but how young should a child be to have theory of mind. My youngest is 5 in 2 weeks and failed the test at her development test, however at her age it seemed to me to be to tasking. She ruined the test and wouldnt even listen to how the doctor wanted to do it, she just kept moving the item around the dolls house she just couldnt make up her mind where to hide the object. even though the doc had already placed the item under the stairs, the Doctor just wasnt amused.

[got the tshirt]

So is the paed seeing her again,if so when?I would say if you not happy with the paed go to the GP and see if you can see another paed,it is possible but may take a while.My son was diagnosed last year and was 6 years 3mths at the time.He probably could have been dx'd at 5 if I had taken him to ther GP the previous year,but I was reluctant as I thought his problems were down to other changes going on at the time.So I dont see the logic in waiting.I have a four year old presenting some problems and can understand why they wouldnt dx him,he is on the waiting list,because many four year olds cant speak 100% or are very active.hOWEVER i THINK 7 is a different story and she can get a dx if she has indeed got AS.

 

 

Yes the paed is seeing her again but not for 6 months, well that was in feb so I suppose about 4 now.

I did think abbout going back to GP cos get on quite well with him. Thought he might have a bit more weight than just me. The trouble is that the school said they don't have any issues and that stopped everything moving forward. Since I found out, I have been telling school about all the things I deal with at home that are related to school. So hopefullly this will make them see that things are not perfect but that Dd3 takes her problems home rather than venting them in the clasroom/playground.

I just think that now we know that she doesnt understand what other people are thinking we should do more to support her.

I agree that they could DX her at 7 but I had been warned that it would be a long process. I have done as much reading as I can about Dx'ing girls but the trouble is I can't make the pead/headteacher read it too.

Thanx to you all for reading my posts and for the advice so far. It really helps to know that you're not alone!!!