Oh My god!

[SuzyQ]

Hi,

 

As some people on here will recall, after 10 months in a psychiatric hospital we finally found my DD a 52 week placement, even though it was in cumbria a 6 hour drive from us it seemed ideal....... now after 12 months social services have served notice on the placement!!

My DD was home for a knee op ( ruptured cruciate ligament) and they have done it whilst she is home .... the op got cancelled as she had infection one in her lung, but the other to self harm cuts on her legs... new op date she was due to return to school for a week, but got a call from the school the day before taking her back saying she wasn't allowed back, that was last tues... also my nt DD 18th birthday and exactly a year to the date my DD started the placement!!

They have found a placement in gravesend... KENT but not really home area!!!! and also it is just a semi indepentant house..... not a whole package in one area!!!

NO ONE is listeneing to me, I viewed the property and it is totally not safe for my DD she is not ready for this step yet, not sure she ever will be she was in a complex care unit at school... you know locks on cupboards etc....

 

She is distraught, it ruined NT DD 18th...... on the sunday the 3rd my DD superficially harmed herself but on thursday 7th she had to go to hospital and have stitches in her arm we also saw crisis team.

Yeasterday the Social worker came.... she is useless..... and my DD hates her she doesn't know my DD only had the case since April...ha ha ha ha and she is deciding what is best for DD ha ha ha ha(hysterical laughter) with a setional worker...hmmm DD didn't like this we are all very angry. when they left DD cried and was distraught, went to her room and in the two minutes it took for me and my other daughter to get upstairs she had cut her arm again... deeper than thursdays..... we went to hospital and spent 6 hours there.... try entertaining sonme one for 6 hours!!! she was so anxious it was awful and angry and hates me as she wants to be at school not with me!!! We got her stitched and a referral being made to her old team at CAMHS but when home....12.30 the agression came straight back, she verbally was abusive, then was trying to cut herself with a lovelt global knife...luckily one we dont use often so rarely gets sharpenned then lunged at me!! then the steel which sharpens it she grabbed it and lunged at me again hitting my arm, then she spat full in my face,then it was a glass herb jar from the cupboard and tried to lock herself out of the house...shutting me in the door kicked me slapped me shouted at me etc...think you all get the idea..... this kind of thing including trying to burn herself and threatening me and hiting me and pushing me and citting her arm went on until just after 3 am, she then calmed...... and with my NT DD who is great at calming her but shouldn't have to be going through this she settled into bed and said sorry to me and that she can't help it...etc....

I know she cant help it but she was in that placement for a reason and one of them is that she isn't safe at home and neither am i!!!!

I was signed off of work last November with severe deppression as it all caused me to have a complete breakdown, I have weekely therapy for it, and have also just managed to start a college course, but this is now suffering , i feel that I was just maybe making a little progress but feel like I am back to how I was in November!

My husband doesn't know how to deal with her, and never has got his head around it.

My NT DD has just started to settle into trying to have a little bit of life, as she hasn't really been able to with DD home, and now she is on the verge of a breakdown and isn't coping as she has me and my other DD to deal with.

HELP...... we have no support network and I feel she has just been dumped here until they can sort things out... the school are worried that she will harmherself ifc she goes back i think....

I must add she tried to strangle herself with a scart lead last night but I managed eventually to get it loose, and she has never cut herself like that at home.

she is also becoming more paranoid, and I have slept with her for a whole week she won't go upstairs at night on her own!!!

 

Sorry about long post just needed to share it...... i don't have anyone else to share with.

 

a very frazzled Suzy

[Karen A]

<'> <'>

 

I am very sorry.I have read your post and have no idea what to say that might help.

But wanted you to know you are not alone with this.

Karen.

[Beebee]

Hi,

 

As some people on here will recall, after 10 months in a psychiatric hospital we finally found my DD a 52 week placement, even though it was in cumbria a 6 hour drive from us it seemed ideal....... now after 12 months social services have served notice on the placement!!

My DD was home for a knee op ( ruptured cruciate ligament) and they have done it whilst she is home .... the op got cancelled as she had infection one in her lung, but the other to self harm cuts on her legs... new op date she was due to return to school for a week, but got a call from the school the day before taking her back saying she wasn't allowed back, that was last tues... also my nt DD 18th birthday and exactly a year to the date my DD started the placement!!

They have found a placement in gravesend... KENT but not really home area!!!! and also it is just a semi indepentant house..... not a whole package in one area!!!

NO ONE is listeneing to me, I viewed the property and it is totally not safe for my DD she is not ready for this step yet, not sure she ever will be she was in a complex care unit at school... you know locks on cupboards etc....

 

She is distraught, it ruined NT DD 18th...... on the sunday the 3rd my DD superficially harmed herself but on thursday 7th she had to go to hospital and have stitches in her arm we also saw crisis team.

Yeasterday the Social worker came.... she is useless..... and my DD hates her she doesn't know my DD only had the case since April...ha ha ha ha and she is deciding what is best for DD ha ha ha ha(hysterical laughter) with a setional worker...hmmm DD didn't like this we are all very angry. when they left DD cried and was distraught, went to her room and in the two minutes it took for me and my other daughter to get upstairs she had cut her arm again... deeper than thursdays..... we went to hospital and spent 6 hours there.... try entertaining sonme one for 6 hours!!! she was so anxious it was awful and angry and hates me as she wants to be at school not with me!!! We got her stitched and a referral being made to her old team at CAMHS but when home....12.30 the agression came straight back, she verbally was abusive, then was trying to cut herself with a lovelt global knife...luckily one we dont use often so rarely gets sharpenned then lunged at me!! then the steel which sharpens it she grabbed it and lunged at me again hitting my arm, then she spat full in my face,then it was a glass herb jar from the cupboard and tried to lock herself out of the house...shutting me in the door kicked me slapped me shouted at me etc...think you all get the idea..... this kind of thing including trying to burn herself and threatening me and hiting me and pushing me and citting her arm went on until just after 3 am, she then calmed...... and with my NT DD who is great at calming her but shouldn't have to be going through this she settled into bed and said sorry to me and that she can't help it...etc....

I know she cant help it but she was in that placement for a reason and one of them is that she isn't safe at home and neither am i!!!!

I was signed off of work last November with severe deppression as it all caused me to have a complete breakdown, I have weekely therapy for it, and have also just managed to start a college course, but this is now suffering , i feel that I was just maybe making a little progress but feel like I am back to how I was in November!

My husband doesn't know how to deal with her, and never has got his head around it.

My NT DD has just started to settle into trying to have a little bit of life, as she hasn't really been able to with DD home, and now she is on the verge of a breakdown and isn't coping as she has me and my other DD to deal with.

HELP...... we have no support network and I feel she has just been dumped here until they can sort things out... the school are worried that she will harmherself ifc she goes back i think....

I must add she tried to strangle herself with a scart lead last night but I managed eventually to get it loose, and she has never cut herself like that at home.

she is also becoming more paranoid, and I have slept with her for a whole week she won't go upstairs at night on her own!!!

 

Sorry about long post just needed to share it...... i don't have anyone else to share with.

 

a very frazzled Suzy

 

 

What can you say to that....i really feel for you. Just remember your'e not alone. Sending you a big 'hug'.

Bee

[Suze]

That referral back to CAMHS needs to be urgent ASAP, I,d seem my Gp today and make sure he phones the physch while your there...........are these suicide attempts, the cuts to her arm and the scarf around her neck or is it superficial, I think your at the point where you have to make someone listen she is obviously deteriorating, with the paranoia , violence etc.Is she on any meds at all?? I wish you the best of luck , suzex <'> ><

[SuzyQ]

Hi Guys.....

Yes she is on meds..... risperdone 6mg lorezapam (was 4mg ) now back to two strattera 120mg...... it's a ngihtmare.

Yes the neck is because she is so unhappy, the cuts are not superficial but also not suicide attemps, she just finds it the best way to cope and I have to say likes seeing blood dripping out!!!

We had emergency app with old psych, he reduced the lorazepam and we gotta go back next week!! I have to sleep wit her she wont go upstairs unless I am with her and now won't go into the kitchen unless I go ..she is ok during the day but as soon as it gets dark forget it it's a nightmare!!!

Social services want to move her to a placement I dont feel will keep her safe, the psych said not to let her go if I think it that unsafe, but I cannot go on any longer, I want her admitted for psych assessment again.... and this time get to bottom of paranioa... last time they blamed drugs and ignored it.... I think in my heart of hearts she is a paranoid schizophrenic and has AS and maybe ADHD.... she is the sort of person you hear about on the news who goes mad and kills people!!!

I am scared for her safety but also the safety of society around her!!!!!

Social services just think I am being an awkward mum!!!

[Karen A]

Hi Guys.....

Yes she is on meds..... risperdone 6mg lorezapam (was 4mg ) now back to two strattera 120mg...... it's a ngihtmare.

Yes the neck is because she is so unhappy, the cuts are not superficial but also not suicide attemps, she just finds it the best way to cope and I have to say likes seeing blood dripping out!!!

We had emergency app with old psych, he reduced the lorazepam and we gotta go back next week!! I have to sleep wit her she wont go upstairs unless I am with her and now won't go into the kitchen unless I go ..she is ok during the day but as soon as it gets dark forget it it's a nightmare!!!

Social services want to move her to a placement I dont feel will keep her safe, the psych said not to let her go if I think it that unsafe, but I cannot go on any longer, I want her admitted for psych assessment again.... and this time get to bottom of paranioa... last time they blamed drugs and ignored it.... I think in my heart of hearts she is a paranoid schizophrenic and has AS and maybe ADHD.... she is the sort of person you hear about on the news who goes mad and kills people!!!

I am scared for her safety but also the safety of society around her!!!!!

Social services just think I am being an awkward mum!!!

 

 

Please do ask the psychiatrists to take some responsibility and document their conserns rather than leaving you to say you don't want her to go.

 

I am sure this has nothing to do with your daughter and everything to do with the cost of various options and who pays.

 

Excuse me.I am not often so outspoken but think there is a time to be cross.

Karen.

[call me jaded]

I think you need to get to the bottom of why the placement has been withdrawn - is the school saying she is too big a risk? What age is she? Was the placement named in a statement or accessed some other way?

 

Recommend you get some legal advice as it doesn't sound as if the SW team are following correct procedures.

[Enid]

OMG Suzy, how terrible, My lad was simialr but calm ish at mo, same meds as yours with exception of lorazepan. You absolutely cannot go on like this that is definate, the semi independant is not going to work because of her fears, have you tried MP? my heart goes out to you. xx

[smiley1590]

i can personally relate to your daughter in lots of different ways and situations you've explained i've been there too .... i'm self harmer cutting knives scissors more on than off for 7 years since i was 14 years old .... i tried to commit suicide several times now by ODing on tabs and ending up in A& E with my mum until early hours of the morning as had to be assessed by emergency crisis pych team ... what makes you come to the specific mental illness paranoid schizophrenia for? is she hearing voices seeing things aren't there? as that what pysch's assessment while in hosp come up with? is the meds helping your daughter? the 24 hour care is helping both you and your daughter get some well earnt rest as both worn out tired of fighting etc such hard battle and as her mum bet feel so helpless useless watching but no being able to take it away the hurt and pain in her head!? does she trying put into words what going on? or just cut? does your daughter seems more relaxed and calm now in hosp? what age she first self harm and when you first noticing 'something wasn't right' signs i suppose if any...??? when you so desperate and frustrated annoyed with yourself and your life you'll do anything make it go awawy run away from what going on as don't really know how you feeling depressed but how going to get out this 'mess' awakard complicated.... etc you feel so misunderstood lost ... self harm seems do trick numb you make escape to place where all 'rushing' thoughts become quitter for abit to think abit clearer without black clouds dark bad dangerous thoughts chasing around in your head with no where to go you become scared afraid trapped ..... and think if you tell anyone everyone think you 'mad' 'nuts' 'loopy' or stop being 'stupid' 'silly' or it get 'better' so hard to hear and then cope and deal with it .... you become so dragged down in everything so overwhelmed struggling you want any way out possible .... it's difficult when feel so alone isolated all time .... everything builds up until becomes unbearable pressure let out even through self harm next step suicide attempts ..... the cuts make feel like 'punishing' yourself being depressed getting this bad having A.S all stuff adds up with it MH bits you feel let down failure burden .....

[smiley1590]

i get paranoid can be part of A.S can go further than just that alot deeper so every possibility needs to be closely into before conclusion is made is this MH placement for education treatment i've been on anti-pyschotic risperdone (risperdal) did naff all for me i know different meds work different types of peeps with range MH probs get fed up as feel so empty .... like there's no hope no future in the end as everything's been tried support services like C.A.M.H.S i know my local one have NO experience of A.S and M.H together so spoke from MH POV always dished out meds and therapy which was pants pathetic excuses .....

 

alot of people who self harm like to see the blood dripping out however wrong and freaky disgusting hideous replusive that sounds can make feel more 'alive' and more in touch with 'reality' bring you back from feeling deattached and zoned out .... can be opposite way can swap and change around! social services can make rash quick judgements about families parents when they havn't personally experienced in highly stressful situations unpredictable dangerous ....

 

does your daughter tell you why she started self harming? gave any clues reasons? does she know? do you know why she O.k during the day with you around and not at night when gets dark makes her fear anxious scared etc? is it like me she knows once you in bed she has opportunity readily to cut self harm much more sneaky covered up then when you're around her keep check on her as much possible! i can understand why this lead you being mentally unwell /unstable for a while coping with all this!