amberzak Report post Posted October 5, 2011 I keep hearing the Aspergers people have issues with romance apparently, but I have heard so many success stories. One of them is my own. I got married 2 months ago after being with my now husband for 4 years. I have aspergers, and while he does sometimes get frustrated with things about me he can't understand, on the whole he is very supportive. I know he must be hard on him sometimes. But then relationships are hard for normal people too. I remember once when talking to a friend, I told her I was appreciated her being my friend dispute aspects of my personality, and she is she is my friend BECAUSE of those aspects. Really made me look at myself differently. Anyone else got nice upbeat stories about success in love. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Suze Report post Posted October 6, 2011 lovely post and so true ....thanks for sharing xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RainbowsButterflies Report post Posted October 6, 2011 I've been married for 6 years and in a relationship with my DH for 14. I have a dx of Aspergers, our 3 year old is under assessment, and it is highly probable that DH and our 2 year old are Aspies as well. I have just been dx with a physical disability which is causing me a lot of issues, and DH is under a lot of stress at work, both of which are contributing to a rocky patch, but I'm sure we'll make it through the other side - battered and bruised maybe, but still intact. There is no reason that Aspies can't have a successful relationship, but communication is key and it's harder for us to find someone we are comfortable enough to talk to (not to say that I don't have my selectively mute moments even now!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Linnet Report post Posted October 6, 2011 I've been married for 7 years and with my husband for 11 years. We have had problems in the past, particularly with communication but he has been very supportive since my dx and has learnt a lot about Asperger's. Our relationship has improved since my dx and my husband says it's because he now knows that I am not being annoying on purpose!!! L x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted October 6, 2011 (edited) Married for 18 years and with DH for nearly 20 here My dad was identified as having HFA/AS at the end of his life when he had various mental health assessments due to failing health...and my parents were married for over 50 years And I think it's great to hear positive stories...I get so fed up reading about how rubbish those of us with AS are at relationships and how we make our OH's lives a misery, etc, etc, etc!! Bid Edited October 6, 2011 by bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lynden Report post Posted October 6, 2011 My husband is probably AS. I'm hesitant to say that often because I don't like self diagnosis, but all the signs are there (according to him and his parents too, not just me). The only reason we haven't gone for a diagnosis is that we don't feel it would make a difference to his, or our lives. The difficulties he does have, he/we cope with and find ways round. We've been together 14 years now, married 12.. We did have some issues, but worked through them, including going for counselling together, and independently (him to a psychotherapist with 20 years ASD experience). I think this is a lovely thread because it is important to realise that all relationships have issues and it's certainly not easy being NT in a relationship either. I didn't understand, for example, that it was just as frustrating for my husband when I was being tactile/affectionate as it was for me when he didn't want to be cuddled. We've both had to compromise and so far, thankfully, it works. We balance one another - I'm probably too emotional, and he's the opposite He also makes it easier for me to understand some of the things my son might be going through. Lynne Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted October 9, 2011 3 years as of last week with The Dude - think it's lovely to hear all these stories Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted October 9, 2011 Great thread Amberzak! Neither I or my husband have AS so I can't really contribute to this thread. We have been married 25 years though, and together for 29. I hope everyone on this thread gets to that stage - and beyond. K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites