help with getting dd to wear school uniform?

[emma hirst]

dd begins reception in September and I am dreading it. School have been very supportive while she has been in nursery, and we have made her a pictoral timetable with photos of all the areas, met her teacher etc...

 

but

 

her main obsession is clothing related, she only wears stripes or tinkerbell outfits. We have bought school uniform and I have persuaded her to wear it for 2 minutes, after which time she ripped it off and had to wear a tutu to help herself recover , but while school are understanding, they want her to wear uniform, and have said that if she isn't wearing it she has to take it with her. I can see her refusing to wear it and being really stressed at having it around...generally if you try to interfere with her obsessions they get more and more difficult. We are just going through statementing at the moment, should I mention it and does anyone have any tips on dealing with it? We did buy a tinkerbell badge for the pinafore but she wasn't convinced

 

Emma

[Tez]

Hi we've always had problems getting our son to wear school uniform as well because of sensory issues.

 

I think it really depends how you want to handle this, under the new disability laws schools have to make reasonable adjustments to accomodate disabled pupils special needs. This would include allowing her to go to school in a modified uniform (say a striped sweat shirt) or something that was more acceptable to her senses.

 

If you want to try and conform abit more and don't think it would harm your daughter too much, what about trying adding some strips discretly somewhere such as a sweat band on her wrist.

 

Sorry I can't be more helpful but I know from experience how inflexible our children can be and how forcing them to do certain things can cause behavioural or psychological difficulties.

Edited August 9, 2005 by Tez

[Amanda32]

Hi Emma

 

Hope this helps, if not there are lots of other member's that will give you more advice if it doesn't help.

 

Clothing, Observations

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=2947

Take care

Amanda <'>

[emma hirst]

Thanks for the link..it is brilliant to know we aren't alone..we are still quite new to this and don't know any other autistic children.

 

emma

[Stephanie]

My son is just coming out of his "issues" with clothes. He always liked to be covered .. long sleeves and trousers, no shorts or T shirts and he always has to have socks on. I got sick of him wearing trousers all the time, and decided to try to get him in shorts ... oh my god!!! But I kept on being persistent ... I tried it again week after week, I found some shorts he liked and then made him wear them for 5 minutes, told him the score "you wear them for 5 minutes, then you can wear trousers, then you will get a good boy sticker", once he had them on, I used diversion tactics, getting him to play etc, counting down the minutes (but making 5 minutes actually 20 minutes) and I always made a fuss "wow, tell Daddy when he gets in what a clever boy you are etc" ... it worked, he'll now wear shorts and T shirts without question (and I never thought he would). I think I was scared of his reaction because I knew he hated them so much, and if it wasn't for my perserverance we wouldn't have come this far. I think sometimes we are so much in fear of upsetting them that we avoid it too much. Still can't get him out of socks though! Stephanie.

[BusyLizzie100]

I had this same concern when my son started school last September. He would only wear joggers, so I didn't think he'd wear school shorts/trousers. however, when we tried his whole uniform on (with much encouragement) a few days before school started, I said how smart he looked and he was fascinated with himself in the mirror. On the first day I thought we'd never get him into it - it takes about an hour to convince him to change out of his pyjamas; if I take them off, he has to put them back on and we start all over again. I went on about looking smart, and he let me put on his uniform! I was gobsmacked.

 

I couldn't convince him to wear a polo shirt with buttons (he has a thing about button shirts), but I found some from M&S with zips, which are acceptable. Unfortunately they no longer do them in blue, but Next has started doing them, so hopefully they'll be OK too!

 

What works for one doesn't necessarily work for another, I know. What about your daughter wearing Tinkerbell/stripey pants or vest, or even a Tinkerbell T-shirt under her school shirt?

 

By the way, it still takes ages to get my son dressed in the morning, uniform or not!

 

Lizzie

[Zemanski]

some schools are more flexible than others - if it is still a problem in a week or teo you could discuss it with the senco.

At my daughter's school one of the SEN kids refuses to wear most of the uniform and insists on wearing coloured jumpers - the senco put it to the head that this was a positive advantage to them in this case, she is constantly on the run and if she looks different they can spot her a mile off!

 

wonder how high school will deal with it next year?

 

Zemanski

[smallworld]

Hi,

My son's school actually asked us to keep him in brightly coloured clothes ! it does make him much easier to spot in the playground. he has a bright red anorak and all the other boys seem to be wearing navy/kahki/grey, very dull. I hope bright colours stay out of fashion for small boys or we'll be stuck

The other side of this coin is that one day, our youngest might want to dress like everyone else, and wonder why he's the only one in red.

Has anyone tried playing schools (including the uniform) before starting school ?

Not the grown-ups

 

wac