Head Upset with us

[Suze]

I,ve posted a few threads regarding my sons problems at school.He has a statement for 10hrs.He has been finding the playground difficult with games and teasing.On occassion he has hit and kicked other children and they have done the same to him.Parents wrote (one letter ) and complained about him in sept via a letter.We had a meeting with the school and autism support at the time and hoped things would improve.Situations have continued to occur and our worry was that these would worsen and our son would either seriously harm someone or they would really hurt him.His ten hours support is quantified as 10 HOURS PER WEEK ADDITIONAL CLASSROOM ASSISTANCE TO HELP/FOCUS ORGANISE STRUCTURED PLAYGROUND ACTIVITIES AND SUPPORT PROGRAMMES. His support is in on tues, wed and thurs.We wrote to the school today and also copied a letter to the sen teacher.(senco). I also put a note on the senco,s letter for her to phone me as I wanted to the discuss the letter . The Head called back this afternoon and her reaction to the letter ...............well she,s not happy.I took advice from parent partnership when writing the letter as I wanted it to be objective and did,nt want to aggravate the situation..........some hope.The head was upset that I had copied a letter to the senco and expected her(the senco ) to phone me to discuss it.She felt the school have supported my son to the best of their ability, that there has been a marked improvement in the playground.She felt her staff had been doing everythig they could (implying she,s spoken to them about it )........we never mentioned in the letter we felt the staff had not done the best they could.The letter simply states he has insufficient support on the playground and we requested an interim review with autism support and lea present to discuss funding prior to his annual review.The head said she spoke to the lea today and they won,t be attending his yr6 review as they don,t normally attend these.I was so upset this afternoon the head is really scary and all we want to do is work with them to sort this out , I don,t want my boy in trouble .They are telling us there is no problem and seemed disgusted that we could write such a letter.

[Hectorshouse]

Oh dear poor old HT just a bit defensive then!!!!

 

You can ask for an interim review when a child is at serious risk of disaffection or exclusion, although LEA's don't like doing them early neither do SENCO's. We have been down this route, and found to our dismay that it was very much a blind alley.

 

If you feel that your son needs more support and that his needs are not currently being met, the best way to change this is to ask for a re-assessment, because even if you get an early review or wait till the review meeting the LEA do not have to amend the statement. So you could be waiting all this time and still not get any improved provision, neither do you have recourse to appeal. If however you go for reassessment you can jump start the process and get secondary school placement considered as well, if however the LEA refuse to reassess then you can appeal against their decision.

 

I've been through this with T and all the stuff written for reassessment is on my bloggy.

 

Also with regard to the review the HT or responsible person (maybe the SENCO) is meant to invite a representative from the LEA as part of the process, I'd be tempted to ask whom this person is?

 

HHxx

[LKS]

Hi Suze <'> So on Monday and Friday is your son not ASD anymore I think HH is quite right the HT is a bit defensive me thinks. I have written a letter to the school before with help from PP who have assured me that it was fine and the school's reaction was unbelievable. I was also surprised that no one from the LEA attended my son's yr. 6 annual review. They were invited but didn't attend. There was a lot of minor things I wanted to ask to be changed on the statement that I thought were no longer relevant and other things that needed to be added. Hope you get some answers

[pumpkinpie]

I am really surprised that no one attended the yr 6 review I thought they were supposed to attend as this was a transision meeting into secondary school?

I t mamazes me that heads take our questions as parents as a personal insult rather than a genuine attempt to participate in our kids education, there is so much in the news about disinterested paretns not supporting behaviour and when we try and resolve this we are treated like the enermy.

I just think you need to speak to ipsea and go for what you want and dont let the head bully you or make you feel guilty. It sounds like your sons statemeent needs amending to provide more support and they are running for the hills!!!!!!!!

[gromit]

Hi suze, your only acting in your sons best interests and are not responsible for the head or anyone else taking it personally. Stick to your guns, sounds like you're going about this as constructively as you possibly can. I'm just at the start of this whole process with my own son and have realised that I cannot afford to take on board other people's adverse reactions, in, particular the HT.

 

Good luck with this.

[witsend]

Hi Suze - sounds like the head is perhaps not too confident in herself and so is on the defensive here. This is not your fault and I think she is acting really unprofessionally taking it all so personally.

Could you get whoever helped you from parentpartnership to step in a bit here? It's sometimes amazing how much more professionally people act when they are aware they are dealing with more then just us mere parents!!

I was also told the LEA guy would not be coming to my sons year 6 review despite the head asking him too (she is v supportive) but when I phoned him and stressed how important it I felt it was that he did attend he backed down and came and thank goodness he did because it was largely on his say so we got sons statement increased. (He did point out that someone from LEA does not have to be there though). Trouble is if LEA person doesn't come then it what you are saying looses its impact in the translation and it all takes longer for a descsion to be made.

Hang on in there - Good Luck.

Luv Witsend.

[Flora]

Suze <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> Don't know what else to say. Just lots of these for you and your son <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

Lauren

[Guest hallyscomet]

Hi <'> <'>

 

Phasmid is usually really good with advise here, perhaps you could PM him

 

Take care, hope you get all the help and support your childs deserves, his must be really upsetting for you and your child.

 

Regards

Hailey <'>

[Suze]

spoke to parent partnership lady today, she was surprised the letter gleaned such a reaction, we can only think that it sounded too business like.She offered to talk to the head, to smooth things over...is this a good idea?

[phasmid]

Smoothing things over is a good idea but I'd be wary of letting someone else handle it for you completely. Perhaps the PP can arrange a 'clear the air' meeting between you and the head. You could then raise your points in person and the head can judge from you manner etc that you want to work with them. What was in the letter that you can think of that upset her so much? I find it hard to believe it was simply because you cc'd it to the SENCO and wanted to talk to her about it.

 

Breaktimes are the cause of so much hassle for our kids. I wish this was the very first thing that was looked at when a dx is given. If breaks are handled well it can take off so much pressure right from the start.

[Suze]

Hi phas I,ve pm,d you the letter.The head believes that the school have fulfilled their obligations.My son was teased last week and he grabbed the offending girl round the neck causing a red mark.This is my worry that our son is being allowed to get to this stage.We don,t want him to hurt other children.The school seem to think this isn,t a problem .........................

[phasmid]

The school seem to think this isn,t a problem ...

 

You have a pm back. As for the above - the school have 'ostrich syndrome' then! The main symptom of which is; Head firmly buried in a bucket of sand so they cannot see what is happening. This is not acceptable AT ALL. The fact that they have been told this and have failed to address it is nothing less than disgusting. I'd still go for that meeting as being the best option to try first and see what happens from there.