dobbie

We are taking our son dx DCD (aspergers almost) to see the clinical pysch. tomorrow, has anyone got any advice to get her on our side in order to get Mats statemented as from previous replies from you good people it looks like that may help us with the school problems. Also did anyone see the article in the papers yesterday about online schooling from home ?

Further to the Senco saying she only raised her voice, one of the lads from Mat's circle of friends came back to our house on Friday and on taking him home and without promptng he said he went to the Learnig Support room with Mat's at dinner time on Friday and a Learning Support person said to Mat's that the pc's were not available on any Friday, he had been told that the previous Friday and that is why "Mrs senco shouted at you on Tuesday". We now don't know whether to forget it or report her (the Senco) to the Head or Chair of Governors, I don't want to cause problems for my lads friend particularly as he's the only one he's got. Its a bad day when you lose confidence in a Senco.

Thank you all for your advice, I think we may well be heading towards a Statement. The School Welfare (Attendance) lady is coming to see us on Monday and Idon't think she knows half the story but we have been told she is very nice and should be able to help with things in general. We also have issues over a shirt being splashed by another pupil with ink in the art lesson and are trying to get the other pupil to pay for it, but thats another story. Never a day goes by without an incident at school. Thank you all. Dobbie.

Spoke to the Senco by phone today,started off by saying that Mat's had come home very upset on tues because she has shouted at him and i said that somewhere in the conversation the word ignorant had been mentioned. She immediately got very defensive (think I hit a nerve) and said that she had only raised her voice to him and that he had ignored her instructions from the previous day not to go on one particular pc's as they were not for general use (this is in the learning support room), she then went on to say that as a Professional she would never use words like that and how could I think that she would. She clamed down a bit after I said that I had to ask her side of the story or I would be wondering whether she had or had not said these things to my Mat's. I think Mat's probably told me the correct version as when he came home today he told me that he did not see the senco on Monday (therfore she could not have instructed him not to go on that pc !!). I don't think I'm in a position to ask his friends to confirm what was said. Anyway I think I've marked her card and requested that in future she makes sure that she gets his attention by using his name,does not shout and asks that he understands what she has instructed him to do, even repeating if necesaary.

To date we have just assumed profesional's will do the job that they should be doing without having to be pushed, so we have been very civil about it all, but we are learing fast that we have to be more assertive or very little gets done or at their pace only which means Mat's (my lad) is going to school with unresolved issues or threats. The best support service I have found is this site asI'm sure many others have. By the way someone asked me about him not being statemented, this is because our local authority does not like to go down this road (only as a last resort apparently) but I'm beginning to think his school may found its a way out of them keeping him if pushed (our paedietrician, who has been very supportive, thinks he should remain in a mainstream school,so that given time he may learn social strategies). Mat's is on school action plus and today we have just been given an appoinment to see an O.T regards his dyspraxia.

Thank you all for the replies and advice, my son does have sensory problems so a shout may not have been quite as he told us, but fortunately he was with at least two other children (one from his circle of friends) at the time and he does usually tell us word for word what was said. I have left a message with the school to get the senco's side of the story and give her a chance to say sorry but I suspect that will not be very forthcoming. We are rapidly losing confidence in the school about numerous issues and at the end of the day it looks like they just don't want to spend the time trying to deal with his social communication problems, or even him being bullied come to that (one such bully has told the head of year that he does it because he finds my lad annoying !!, this week he's been called a retard), its all just to much for them. Anyway thanks again for your support. Bob & Debs.

My lad age 12 dx with DCD (school told to treat as if he has aspergers) has been shouted at and called ignorant by his own Senco, any ideas where we go from here ??

Our son was born at 25 weeks and was dx with DCD very recently, he's now 12. Its very similar to ASD and we have been told that a lot of really early prems that manage to avoid brain damage, breathing problems or cystic fybrosis are likely to have some form of DCD (developemental co-ordination disorder). the school have been told to treat him with stratergies similar to aspergers/ASD Hope that helps.

Yes please Carole, where do I find your 'paper on autism and socalisation' Thank you all for your suppport.

He has'nt got any friends, he 12 by the way, its the schools idea to trying to help him make friends, the one they set up last year got of to a reasonable start , but they seemed to be just reporting his responses to other childrens name calling etc and that just him even more stressed out. The school seems to thinks he is the problem, as pooosed to a child with problems, as he takes up too much of their time. This by the way is from a Christian based school, that is very highly thought of locally.

My lad has DCD to which his school has been told by the health professional to employ strategies for ASD or Aspergers. Today he has come home with a pictograph of rules to follow for his circle of friends the context of which goes like this:- I will listen to my circle of friends. My circle of friends wants to help me stay out of trouble. My teachers want me to stay out of trouble. My parents want me to stay out of trouble. If I listen to my circle of friends I will stay out of trouble. If I listen to my circle of friends my teachers will be happy. If I listen to my circle of friends my paretns will be happy. Has she missed the point or what ?? we wondered if she was up to the job when we first met her. Comments please

We have been told by the doctor that they don't like to statement children in the Notts area although that is an option that we may have to follow if all else fails. Our next port of call is to an Occupational Therapist to see how ds he is and what they can do to help him, he really struggles to do p.e and we were surprised to learn that at the age of 12 he cannot run backwards without falling over and as a lot of p.e at school involves football he is on a loser from the start and gets called a lot by the other kids becuase he can't play football (scores home goals which they don't like).

Thanks for the tips, we have already joined a dyspraxic help group locally and when the school asked the doctors about whether he should be in a mainstream school the unanimous reply was yes most certainly, where else should he be !! The look on the heads face was enough to tell me what she was thinking and after furhter discussions it was very apparent that they had no idea how to handle a child with ASD traits. Its a struggle to get our son to school because of the bullying, he got beat up again last week and the school still managed to turn the tables on him saying he was to blame, mainly because whan asked if he hit someone he says he did but does not give them any more information to resolve the issues, the other kids appear to be claiming he has made racists comments which he denies and being very truthfull I believe him but the school obviously does not. the schools problem is that it may take several hours to resolve what happened and that means teachers are missing their free periods (in other words too much trouble). Rather than helping our son I think they will eventuall try to get him excluded.

I'm new to this chat style forum so forgive any errors. We have just been informed that our son age 12 has DCD developemntal co-ordination disorder,along with a whole host of social disorders and other perceptual problems, he was being investigated for aspergers but because has a little bit of imagination they could not agree on that diagnosis, although in a meeting with the school as to what stratgies they should use ther reply was do the same as for ASD. The school cannot manage him or will not as they see him as a naughty boy who takes up a lot of their time to manage and he goes from detention to detention on a daily basis. We told the school when he joined them a year ago that he was a challenge. Has anyone got any advice to help us on our way. Thanks.