leeds_demon

What constitutes a meltdown? How is a meltdown different from aggressive behaviour? For example, when my computer lost sound, I started to cry and panic. Could this behaviour be considered a meltdown. Likewise, when my former housemate lost my debit card, which I lent her, I verbally ripped into her, to the extent that she had a panic attack. Could my behaviour in this instance be considered a meltdown? I will admit that whenI couldn't get my travel costs from the Sheffield Asperger's Service, on my first visit, due to the relevant member of staff being on holiday, I started to cry and get upset. Likewise, when I was told that I would have to pay back overpaid tax credits, I panicked and cried. The thing is, my meltdowns are very infrequent and I get the impression that Aspies have meltdowns all the time. Ergo, I can't be an Aspie.

So anyway I contacted Sheffield Asperger's Syndrome Service. I spoke to one of the admin staff, who spoke to the clinical psychologist who assessed me. I made it very clear to Carly, that I may have over-exaggerated my ability to say things which might offend people. The next day, I spoke to Carly, who told me that Dr. Telford didn't just give the dx of Asperger's because of that little bit of information. But the thing which I don't understand is this: there are lots of people who have strong aversions to certain foods/smells/tastes, but they're not given a label. There are people who can be quite aggressive, but they're no labelled as being 'autistic'. There are people who have really good long-term memories, but they're not told that they have Asperger's. There are plenty of people who don't like socialising, but they're not advised to see a clinical psychologist. Likewise, there are plenty of adults who have temper tantrums, but they're not told that they are autistic.

@darkshine. I'm applying for DLA and I don't want to apply for a benefot that I might not be entitled to, assuming that I did win the appeal and/or the policy person from the DWP decides that people with Asperger's is a disability that should merit DLA.

I was assessed in 2010.

The thing is, I have only said some, (what could be be seen to be), offensive, such as that I told my Mother I don't want to be like her, (this was whilst I was living at home). The second example was when I asked my lecturer why she didn't wear make up. These are the only two examples where I have said something that could be deemed 'offensive'. I sometimes say things that get me wondering as to whether the person I have spoken to will take things the wrong way. Maybe that's what I meant. I don't know. As follows, this is what my parents reported: I was delayed in using and calculating numbers; I was delayed in playing with other children; I seemed to be unusually passive, (I'm now fairly aggressive when people annoy me. In fact, when I was sharing with my former housemate, she would have panic attacks because of my aggressive behaviour. If you want to get rid of a girlfriend/boyfriend/friend, just display behaviour that will make them have a panic attack); I was unusually attached to a particular object, (although obviously this is now stopped); I was frequently upset by particular sounds; I had, (and still have), food fads; I had, (and still have), difficulty in getting things in order when doing a task requiring organisation, and; when I had a task that required a lot of thought, I tended to avoid or delay getting started. So all you amateur clinical psychologists, have I Asperger's, or not, given that I don't say things to offend people, even though I cited one example and the assessor said that I frequently say things that might cause offence?

If I don't hardly make comments that offend people, then I must have lied. However, the second psychologist, who I saw for follow up interviews, said it's impossible to lie, with regards to getting a diagnosis.

@Special_talent123. Well don't read the thread. I was just pointing out that something in the report was incorrect; that I might have over empahasised. In the past I might have said things to some people, which might have offended them - but not on a frequent basis and I don't now make remarks that may offend people.

Accordign to the report, the Asperger questionnaire, which my parents filled in, lends some support to a diagnosis of AS. The second psychologist who saw me for a couple of follow-up sessions said that's impossible to lie regarding Asperger's and that due to my lack of abstract thinking and central coherence, I do have the condition. But the initial report said I frequently say things that might cause offence, but I just gave one example. I do know that I can be aggressive towards people who annoy me. I don't know whether I find eye contact disconcerting - but I do know that sometimes I can look at people and at other times, not look at people.

@ trekster. I have no interests whatsoever. I don't have any collections, (say of toby jugs, football cards, etc). Ergo, I can't be an Aspie. Re: social life. I don't have any friends and I can't leave my dog by himself. Also, because I have a very low wage, I don't have any spare money.

p.s. I did the AQ Test, (yet again) and my scores were 35, 29 and 40. Go figure.

I was re-reading my assessment report compiled by the psychologist who assessed me at Sheffield Asperger's Unit. At the time of my assessment, I said that I don't do social chit-chat and yet, when I go to the shops, I do talk to the shop assistants. I also said that I'm not a good conversationalist, but I can be. OK, so I don't have any friends, but there are lots of NTs who don't. It says in the report that I frequently find myself saying things that cause offence to other people, but I only mentioned one occasion, when I asked one of my university tutors why she didn't wear make up. I can socialise, if I so wished to, it's just that I don't have any money and I don't want to leave my dog for too long. So when I asked the second psychologist, who saw me for a couple of follow-up interviews, if it was possible to lie in an assessment, (so as to get a diagnosis), I was correct. And I can look people in the eye, when I talk to them, even though I told the psychologist, who assessed me, that I find it disconcerting. Based on the above, I know I'm not an Aspie. I guess I lied!!

I just had a two hour assessment at the Sheffield Asperger's Unit and during that time my parents were interviewed. The consultant psycholigist, even though there wasn't much to go in the questionnaire that my parents completed, (they mostly answered N/A and No), still said I was autistic. Given that the unit at Sheffield is supposed to be one of some repute, I am surprised that the assessment was only brief - hey ho.

If you want to receive DLA then the only thing you can do is lie. I have no mobility issues and do not need care and yet, I can only work for 10 hours a week, due to my lack of slef-motivation. If the agency, for which I do telemarketing, decides to dispense with my services, (I am a self-employed telemarketer), then I have no income, unless I apply for JSA. Today, I learnt that I will receive £97.20 a week in Housing Benefit, instead of the £103 -odd I was getting, due to the fact that I earn £320 a month. My landlord has asked me to contribute an extra £10 a month, maybe a bit more. If I did claim DLA, then I would lose more HB, so I'm in a quandry. But what I do know is that Aspies are one group of disabled people who are being denied DLA, even though they are disabled. Asperger's Syndrome is deemed to be a disability and yet most of us are denied DLA in the first instance. And the NAs does faff all.

I found out today that I have been turned down for DLA. The NAS is useless, inasmuch as they don't give you any information as to what to write for each question. I was led to believe that if a person can't cook a meal from scratch, then they might get help. I get easily stressed when cooking a meal & I usually end up eating say around 8pm, because I end up surfing the net and forget to put the oven on. I don't socialise as I don't have any friends - in fact I don't like socialising. I don't like strange people, such as plumbers, etc, coming into my house and I don't like people using my bathroom. Can someone explain how I, someone with Asperger's is able to get some help? I am also wondering if the new Personal Independence Payment will actually take into account the various traits experienced by those of us with Asperger's.

I'm applying for DLA and I'm not being looked after by anyone. People with AS can apply for DLA as we are disabled. There is also the 'meal test', whereby if yoy can't prepare a meal from scratch, then you might get help. I mainly eat ready meals as I get stressed out cooking a meal from scratch. Also, it takes me ages to get round to put a meal in the oven to be cooked. I think to myself that I should eat before 6pm/7pm, but I end up eating around the 8pm mark.

Hi Gutcruncher. Don't panic too much, even though right now you might be thinking, 'how am I going to cope?' First of all apply for either ESA or DLA. ESA is for people who are too ill to work and it would appear that you might be too 'ill' to work. Apply for DLA - this takes time and the form is rather long to say the least. Provide a supporting statement, outlining your difficulties. Unfortunately, the DLA application form doesn't take into account the particular problems associated with Aspies. Contact your local Social Services and ask them what they are doing with regards to the National Autism Strategy, if they reply that they don't know what it is, suggest to them that they should. If you get no joy, then contact your local MP explaining your situation and that your local Social Services department is useless. However, I don't think that Social Services might be able to help; you might need to speak to someone in your local Adult Sevices - the department that is responsible for the care of vulnerable adults. With regards to self-employment, it can be a bit stressful, but if you have certain skills - i.e research skills, then you can put these to good use. I do telemarketing and although it is boring and I don't get paid a lot, I am in charge of myself - I am not beholden to work colleagues or bosses. Have you thought about becoming a researcher, or maybe becoming a consultant - offering advise to companies, with regards to the Disability Discrimination Act. By the way, employers are required to make reasonable adjustments for employees who are disabled. Are you able to learn new skills, which you can then utilise - for example, learning how to design websites, or how to design jewellery. Have you been to your local CAB? If not, you should, they may even help you fill out the DLA and ESA forms. As for the NAS, they're not much cop, to be honest.

As far as employment is concerned, if you want to go down the self-employment route, the NAS Prospects Service is worse than useless - they just want to get Aspies, who use their service, into any job, no matter how menial. As for support for adult Aspies, ask your council what they are doing, re: the Autism Strategy.

Re: my assessment. I did all the legwork in trying to find where in Leeds there was a psychiatrist/psychologist who could refer me to Sheffield Asperger's Service.

As a youngster in primary school I was hopeless at maths and at secondary school I was helpless. Apparently, having poor maths skills is something associated with Aspergers. However, Aspies are some to have good reading/writing skills. I was reading newspapers, at around the age of 10 and I an always remember the yearly reading tests at primary school and always wanting to beat one of my classmates, who seemed to do a bit better than me.

But I hevan't been taught/learnt how to look people in the eye, that's what I am saying.

No I am not poor with money!! I am obsessed with making sure that I have money in my bank accounts, whuich is due to the fact that I was on JSA for around 12 years, (after finishing my Master's), and because I didn't have lots of money then,I don't like spending it now. I don't make much money as it is, bit it's more than what JSA pays. I like the thought of having money in my accounts - even if I won the Lottery, I would hardly spend any money. When my Grandfather left me some money in his Will, I bought a watch and then I used the rest to help pay the bills and my parents criticised me for doing that, so maybe my not spending money is a reaction to their criticism? Likewise, when my Ex asked for a loan, I dreaded the thought of lending it to her. I haven't bought new clothes for ages, as I hate spending money. I'll spend money on Christmas presents for my family, but this year, I will have to buy a present for my niece, who will be born in December - one more expense!! At least I don't have to buy my brother's Ex anything. Tally: are you saying that I don't have Asperger's, because I monitor my spending?

What coping strategies. I've never been taught to hold my gaze when talking to someone - no-one, apart from one of my tutors at college - has said that I don't look people in the eye. I mentioned to the psychologist at Sheffield that I say things that cause offence to people, but I only did this once when I was at university & I asked a lecturer if she thought about wearing make-up, so I wasn't being totally truthful, when I told her that I say things that cause offence; although in the past, I did tell my mum that I didn't want to end up being like her. Re: my diagnosis. The assessment took two hours - some of the time Dr. Telford was chatting to my Mum and Dad. The dx was based on the questionnaire, that my parents filled out out, but when I saw the questionnaire in a follow up session,. most of the answers my parents gave, were 'can't remember' or N/A. My parents did point out that I lack socials skills due to not socialising and that I am tunnel-visioned. I also read that Aspies are not good with money, whereas I am. When I've been out shopping, I come home and write down everything I spent, making sure that what i have left in my purse corresponds with what amount of money I should have leftover. I also check my bank accounts online at least once a day and write down what I have in my bank accounts maybe every other day, especially if I have withdrawn money, or a direct debit has been paid. I have about 100, maybe more A4 pieces of paper, detailing my daily spending and how much I have in my accounts. Re: wearing night clothes. Gary McKinnon would just stay in his underwear.

Yes, I have a formal dx of Asperger's. Re: the nighwear thing. I prefer wearing nightclothes, as I can find dayclothes, such as skirts and blouses a bit too restrictive, if that makes sense. If you look up the various AS traits, then poor hygiene is one of them. I have been formally assessed by one psychologist at the Sheffield Asperger Syndrome Service and the second psychologist, who was being supervised by a senior colleague, as she was undergoing training, also said that I have Asperger's. The second psychologist noted: 'I am in no doubt that Emma meets the criteria for Asperger Syndrome and in fact, it is due to her difficulties in abstract thinking and central coherence that I feel she struggles to see the wider picture as to why she meets the criteria and instead, focuses on specific details, which may or may not, be consistent with diagnosis.'

Sometimes I do have to have a reason to talk to people. My Dad, in the car back, from visiting my Mum in hospital, said that he thought I wasn't good at making conversation. I've re-read the report from the assessment and I have been thinking to myself about what I said. I suppose I could socialise with people, if I so wished to, but I just can't be bothered to; also, it would mean me having to spend moeny and I hate spending money. I suppose I could make small-talk with people, if I so wished to, but sometimes, I find it difficult as to what I should say. For example, if I see my neighbour, Betty, I'll go and talk to her and might not need an excuse to say hello. Which is what I told the pyschologist. But then again, I find it easy to talk to Betty. I can't say that I've 'learnt' how to laugh at funny jokes/programmes, or how to look people in the eye. It just comes naturally to me. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. Maybe I got the idea into my head that I can't look at people, from when I did a presentation at college and i didn't look at my fellow students - ergo maybe I was lying about not looking people in the eye? And yet, I have other Aspie traits, such as spending most of my day in my nightwear - I work from home. I get easily stressed out about things. When I was sharing with someone, I induced a couple of panic attacks in her, because I verbally laid into her - once when I lost a pen and the n the second time, when she lost my debit card, I had lent to her. I'm not keen on people, whom I don't really know, such as workmen, using the toilet in my house. I'm not keen on the idea of staying overnight in a B&B, as I might have to sue the loo, given that's it's been used previously. I do have a good long-term memory and good personal hygiene - I've been told that Aspies have poor hygiene standards. It takes me ages to get round to washing dirty dishes, sometimes days go by, without me washing them, then all of a sudden, I will do the dishes, hoover upstairs, etc. I still have to clean the fridge/freezer top, which is covered in dust from cat/dog biscutits, etc and I still haven't changed the kitchen towel that lines the shelves in my food cupboard. But I can't remember someone telling me to look people in the eye, how to make small-talk, etc. The thing is, anyone can lie to a psychologist; all you have to do is look up the symptoms of Asperger's, put on a monotone voice and not the psychologist in the eye. Simple!! Plenty of people don't look other people in the eye when talking to them. Plenty of people hate certain foods. Plenty of people have poor hygeine standards, but do all these behaviours make them Aspies. There are lots of people, who don;t have friends, are they Aspies? The second psychologist I saw, who was still in training to work with Aspies, saw me for a couple of follow-up appointments, (the psychologist, who assessed me was on maternity leave). I asked the second psychologist, if it was possible to lie about having AS and she said no. In her discharge letter, the psychologist writes that she is in no doubt that I meet the criteria for AS. So why do I feel a fraud?

I've looked at various posts in General Discussion and have come to the conclusion that maybe I don't have Asperger's. I can laugh at funny tv/radio programmes. Sometimes I can look people in the eye. I don't have a monotone voice. I will admit to havin meltdowns, but they're very few and far between. It's not as if I don't want to go out, it's just that I can't be bothered. I don't have the facial charactersitics that the research team, led by Professor Kritina Aldridge, at the University of Missouri, suggest that people with Autism have. I can make small talk with people, if I have to - I don't find making small talk really difficult, a such. I might have told the clinical psychologist, who assessed me, a little white lie re: making small talk. I can talk to people and once I get started, sometimes I can't stop. I may not need a reason to talk to someone, which I told the psychologist I did, but I might have trouble keeping the conversation going, unless me and the other person are talking about a subject that I'm interested in. I've been led to believe that Aspies don't bother to ask people how they are, what they do for jobs - that they don't show much interest in other people. But I do. Ergo, how can I be an Aspie?